| | | Off Topic Anything and everything non boxing can be talked about in here. | 
02-25-2008, 06:34 AM
|  | vituperative | |
Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: a local pub near you.
Posts: 6,213
Punch Power: 1967 | |  Re: To all females at Saddo's
I like how this was for the women of saddo's and Canvasback, PrideofMora, and Jules can't wait to post! 
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That bird is mutton-dressed-as-lamb and twice his age man!
|
02-29-2008, 12:58 AM
|  | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's  +101
Things You Learn From Watching Porn
Women wear high heels to bed.
Men are never impotent.
When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he fucks her.
Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with spunk.
Women enjoy having sex with ugly middle-aged men.
Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blow job.
Women always orgasm when men do.
A blow job will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.
All women are noisy fucks.
People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.
Those tits are real.
A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.
Men always groan 'OH YEAH' when they cum.
If there is two of them they 'high five' each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!)
Double penetration makes women smile.
Asian men don't exist.
If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth.
There's a plot.
When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the ass.
Nurses suck patients cocks.
Men always pull out.
When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking both of you.
Women never have headaches.
When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to 'suck it'
Assholes are clean.
A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.
Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's pants and find a cock there.
Men don't have to beg.
When standing during a blow job, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip.
Pigtails = handlebars.
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"Fere libenter homines id quod volunt credent" (Julius Caesar) |
02-29-2008, 01:09 AM
| | Forum Greatest Of All Time | |
Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Posts: 2,160
Punch Power: 781 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Quote:
Originally Posted by X  Things You Learn From Watching Porn
Women wear high heels to bed.
Men are never impotent.
When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he fucks her.
Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with spunk.
Women enjoy having sex with ugly middle-aged men.
Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blow job.
Women always orgasm when men do.
A blow job will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.
All women are noisy fucks.
People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.
Those tits are real.
A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.
Men always groan 'OH YEAH' when they cum.
If there is two of them they 'high five' each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!)
Double penetration makes women smile.
Asian men don't exist.
If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth.
There's a plot.
When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the ass.
Nurses suck patients cocks.
Men always pull out.
When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking both of you.
Women never have headaches.
When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to 'suck it'
Assholes are clean.
A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.
Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's pants and find a cock there.
Men don't have to beg.
When standing during a blow job, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip.
Pigtails = handlebars. | Oh No X - You have single handedly smashed my dreams of ever becoming a "real girl/woman".
I just don't think I can live up to such monumental examples of complete selfishlessness.
Alas I will have to instead just live with comments from my male teammates such as "look at her she's a little dude" and take seriously sparring tips often yelled out mid round such as "Sharla your left nut is hanging out".
I will sit here for a while and contemplate just how messed up I really am! :P   |
02-29-2008, 01:14 AM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Listen and learn just how stupid we really are ...... and then carefully plot how to rule the world in a female wimmin republic !!  |
02-29-2008, 06:52 AM
| | Forum Greatest Of All Time | |
Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Adelaide, South Australia
Posts: 2,160
Punch Power: 781 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Quote:
Originally Posted by X Listen and learn just how stupid we really are ...... and then carefully plot how to rule the world in a female wimmin republic !! | Why X that is a fantastic idea! I shall review your posts and start taking notes Perhaps I shall give you privilidges not afforded to the rest of men-folk once women are in power for coming up with the idea! |
03-11-2008, 08:49 PM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
WOMENS PERSONAL ADS
40-ish - 49
Adventurous - Slept with everyone
Athletic - No tits
Average looking - Ugly
Beautiful - Pathological liar
Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure - On medication
Feminist - Fat
Free spirit - Junkie
Friendship first - Former very *friendly* person
Fun - Annoying
New Age - Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded - Desperate
Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate - Sloppy drunk
Professional - Bitch
Voluptuous - Very Fat
Large frame - Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate - Stalker |
03-11-2008, 08:49 PM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Men's Personal Ads
40-ish - 52 but looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic - Sits on the couch all day and watches sports
Average looking - Ugly
Average weight - Used to weigh 300lb, now weighs 297lb
Educated - Will always correct you and treat you like a retard
Free spirit - Likely to cheat, maybe with a family member
Friendship first - Wants to check your not too ugly first
Fun - Good with a remote and a six pack
Good Looking - Big headed
Honest - A good liar
Huggable - Overweight and enough body hair to resemble a teddy bear
Like to cuddle - Insecure
Polite - Says excuse me when he lets one rip
Open-minded - Will start dating your sister if she's better looking than you
Physically fit - Spends a lot of time admiring himself in the mirror
Religious - Went to church with his grandmother once when he was young
Committed - Occasional stalker, but never arrested
Thoughtful - Says "Please" when demanding a beer
Adventurous - Slept with everyone |
04-02-2008, 09:58 AM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's +1142
Husband and wife.....
BEFORE MARRIAGE:
Husband - Aaah! ...At last! I can hardly wait!
Wife - Do you want me to leave?
Husband - No! Don't even think about it.
Wife - Do you love me?
Husband - Of course! Always have and always will!
Wife - Have you ever cheated on me?
Husband - No! Why are you even asking?
Wife - Will you kiss me?
Husband - Every chance I get!
Wife - Will you hit me?
Husband - Hell no! Are you crazy?!
Wife - Can I trust you?
Husband - Yes.
Wife - Darling!
AFTER MARRIAGE: read from bottom to top. |
06-06-2008, 08:17 AM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's +32767
Her Diary :-
He was a bit quiet and withdrawn this evening, even when we went to bed he said nothing. I cuddled up to him and stroked his hair, after a while we made love before drifting off to sleep.
His Diary :-
Fucking gutted, England lost, got a shag though |
06-06-2008, 05:20 PM
|  | Forum Champ | |
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Manila, Philippines
Posts: 377
Punch Power: 93 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sharla | Haha!
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Baggins Clan
|
06-06-2008, 06:13 PM
|  | Baggins Clan | |
Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Georgia
Posts: 6,345
Punch Power: 802 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Quote:
Originally Posted by X INTERNATIONAL RULES OF MANHOOD 2008
8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the
weakest.
| Good advice.
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06-19-2008, 02:31 AM
|  | Death Metal Fanatic | |
Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: in slum area
Posts: 1,615
Punch Power: 350 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
|
06-25-2008, 05:56 PM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
Women are like squaring numbers.
If they are under 16, just do them in your head. |
01-11-2009, 11:22 AM
| | Old Guard | |
Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: In my own little Universe
Posts: 5,548
Punch Power: 1266 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's
What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A whore sleeps with everybody at the party, and a bitch sleeps with everybody at the party except you. |
01-11-2009, 04:19 PM
| | Forum Greatest Of All Time | |
Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: north-east of england
Posts: 2,620
Punch Power: 1068 | | Re: To all females at Saddo's +32767
Always respect the ladies my male friends.You cant live without a lady in your life.Women should be worshiped for the godness stature their are!!We were all born women you know.The first 6weeks of concievement we all are born as a female,soo just keep that in mind.Respect the ladies 
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Last edited by yvonne : 01-11-2009 at 06:53 PM.
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