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As kids growing up in the Kahn household, there were two things we had to endure that no children should be subjected to. The first was my father’s insistence to be what he called a “hip” dad and use every expression known to youth, so he could, as he would try to explain to my mother whenever she told him to stop talking like that, “relate to us better”.
Except when you are 12 years old, “hip” dad is not the version you want your friends to see, especially since it was 1985 and dad was still using words like “groovy” and “dig It”. Of course, the heavy Asian accent did not help matters but looking back, his heart was in the right place and hey, he tried!
The second thing we had to endure in our house was what came to be known as “The Expression of Confusion”. In case anyone out there is wondering what I am talking about, the expression of confusion is one of those outlandish phrases that are supposed to be examples of lessons learned in life but as a kid leave you standing there saying to yourself “huh”?
For example, when I was 10, all I wanted in the entire world was a pair of Adidas Superstars. You know, the ones with the shell on the front? Instead, my mom brings home a pair Converse Chuck Taylors, “Just like they wear on Happy Days,” she states.
Walking away dejected and depressed, what do I get to console me? My Uncle Fred, by marriage I must publicly state, blurting out “Don’t look so ungrateful, a bird in the hand is better then two in the bush”.
EXCUSE ME? WHO ARE YOU AGAIN? I have a pair of sneakers that will most likely have me as the brunt end of every jokester in school for the next three months and you are telling me about a bird in a bush!
But it was my Grandmother who really was “The Master of Adages”. If there was ever some sort of title given out for use of these metaphors, she would, without a doubt, in my mind be pound for pound Queen.
That lady could go an entire day from sun up to sun down using nothing but metaphors, starting out with “Well look who finally woke up? If you were a milkmaid, young man, the world’s coffee would be black” and end with “Have a good night’s sleep and remember, the early bird gets the worm”.
While still just as confusing and utterly annoying to the pre-teen mind, grandma, at least unlike Uncle Fred, would use the appropriate expression at the appropriate times.
As kids, we promise ourselves that if we should ever have children of our own we will NEVER subject them to such punishment, yet as a father of four, on occasion find myself using my grandmother’s words of wisdom in situations without even realizing it, confusing my children just as much as I was at their age I am sure.
Except now as an adult, I understand the meaning behind the phrases so there is an appreciation value to these adages and I also must admit at times there is a bit of amusement to be had watching the expressions on their faces when I hit with one of the classic “Expression of Confusion”.
There is a reason why these words of wisdom have been passed down from generation to generation and contrary to the popular belief of kids across the world, it is not to make their lives miserable. It is because behind them is a hidden meaning, when you can look past the outlandishness of their creation to begin with one genuinely can find words to live by.
While observing the sport of boxing over the last six months or so, I see a few guys out there who could benefit a bit from these expressions, So in tradition of my grandmother who turns 96 next month, and not Uncle Fred who will more then likely be at her party and has yet to learn the appropriate time to use even one of these adages, while continuously after all these years throwing them out like playing cards, I am going to pass a few along with hopes these fighters don’t stand around with the classic “huh?” expression I once did and put the words to good use.
Mind Your P’s and Q’s: This is one adage former middleweight champion Jermain Taylor may want to seriously contemplate. Once considered the heir apparent to Bernard Hopkins, Taylor’s stock has dipped severely.
Sure, he briefly captured the titles from Hopkins, partially fulfilling his destiny but once the straps were around his waist, Taylor lost all focus not realizing it is after you become champion the work really begins. That title makes you the target of every fighter capable of making 160lbs; it is the prestige of being champion others want and will do what ever it takes to get there.
After winning the rematch with Hopkins, Taylor seemed to lose focus from day one. He looked mediocre winning against Kassim Ouma, was given a gift from the judges by receiving a draw in the Winky Wright bout and even in his defense against Corey Spinks, some say Taylor was not worthy of the win.
Three lackluster affairs over opponents that are in actuality, 154 pound fighters, is no way to begin a middleweight title reign, especially when the man who preceded you is considered one of the top three greatest middleweights of all time.
Somewhere between the first Hopkins bout and the Spinks fight, Taylor went from “Bad Intentions” to “Bad Performer” virtually over night. I don’t know if it was the pressure of being champion or that fact that he enjoyed everything outside the ring that goes along with it a bit too much.
Taylor is not the fighter he was two years ago and at not even 30 years of age, with a long career still ahead of him, Jermain must decide if this is what he still wants because that lack of focus he has displayed cost him the title.
Kelly Pavlik is a young, strong and determined fighter; Taylor should have done his homework before the bout and taken Pavlik seriously. If anything, the way Pavlik dismantled Edison Miranda should have given Taylor a hint that this guy was for real, not that Miranda is ever to be confused as a master boxer but he is strong with a relentless style and Pavlik handled him with ease.
If Taylor ever wants to sit on top of the throne again as champion, be it at middleweight or anywhere else, he needs to regain the focus that brought him to his first title reign. He needs to forget being Jermain Taylor “champion in the spotlight” and start minding his P’s and Q’s or else the only thing positive in Jermain’s boxing future will be his memories of the past.
A good big man will always beat a good little man: This adage is something that Winky Wright may want to contemplate. The former 154 pound champion and man that many have considered for years the best defensive fighter in all of boxing, looks to be a bit overzealous as of late by seemingly moving up another division with every bout in search of one more world title.
We all know that Wright is, without a doubt, a great fighter but he is also moving on in years, at 36 years old it is natural for a fighter to lose a step or two in the ring and with Wright never possessing what you would call knockout power to begin with, even in the 154 pound weight class, residing at 175 or even 168 is going to reduce that KO percentage that much more.
The added years are also not helping in the punch output department either and to make matters worse, Wright has looked a bit more hittable recently something a natural 154 pound fighter certainly does not want when stepping in with the young lions at light heavyweight.
I hope Winky rethinks his decision to fight in the upper weight classes soon and stops all this foolishness, because contrary to the belief of some, size does matter especially when being hit repeatedly to the face and body for 36 minutes.
Be careful what you wish for: This adage is for Ricky Hatton to contemplate and contemplate soon because his mouth may get him in trouble before long. I have been a longtime supporter of Hatton and always respected his desire to reach the top of his game, but ever since his post-fight comments directed towards Floyd Mayweather Jr, after the Castillo bout, I must admit questioning his train of thought.
I can understand trash talk and wanting to secure a high profile bout, it is the calling out Mayweather by stating “You just seen more excitement in the ring tonight than in all of Floyd Mayweather’s entire career,” which I cannot agree with.
I guess Hatton’s plan worked just the way he wanted because he has a December showdown with boxing’s number one fighter pound for pound but at what expense will it come?
Mayweather is no Kosta Tszyu nor is he Jose Luis Castillo, both of whom were on the downside of their careers when Hatton defeated them. Also, Hatton had basically zero knockout power during his stay at 147, plus his hit and hold tactics will not be effective against a man who is rarely hit clean and has been able to withstand shots from Oscar De La Hoya at 154 without budging.
I am not making any sort of prediction here, only time will tell if Hatton will or will not be able to defeat Mayweather. All I am saying is it may not be wise to insult the best fighter in the world today and then agree to face him at a weight already proven to be unsuited for you.
It could be a punishing and even embarrassing lesson. If you don’t want to take my advice, just pop in a tape of what Bernard Hopkins did to Felix Trinidad in their middleweight showdown after being insulted.
Work smarter not harder: This adage is for Edison Miranda and it will be kept it short and sweet.
When a man possesses your punching power and desire to win, there are easier ways to go about things than turning up the heat full blast from the opening gate.
The most obvious downfall is if the guy in front of you is still standing after the fifth round, your night just go a whole lot longer. Next is the fact that some guys can take it on the chin all night without falling, assuming they don’t tire out.
Power of your caliber is something great to possess as a fighter, it’s just not the only thing a fighter needs to be successful for the long haul. Develop a jab, increase your accuracy and put punches together without going for the home run on every swing. Add a bit of defense and you just made your job a whole lot easier.
Hopefully, you learned your lesson already in the loss to Pavlik, a lesson you should have learned in the Arthur Abraham bout. When in doubt, if these other attributes really are important to keep succeeding, watch a few of Mike Tyson’s bouts from the mid 1980’s and then watch a few from the late 1990’s; it should all come together.
Too many cooks spoil the pot: This adage is for Oscar De La Hoya and should actually be taken most seriously. While Golden Boy Promotions is a great concept in regard to the goal being to make sure the fighters keep the highest portion of their earnings in the future, I foresee a huge struggle for attention among its stable.
Yes, it is nice to have a larger percentage of your purse and great to have a say in your career in the aspect of who you fight and where…etc, but there is something I believe everyone at Golden Boy is forgetting.
Fighters have big egos, especially once they reach the pinnacle of their careers. Every top level pro wants to be made to feel as if he is priority number one when it comes to his promotion company and when you have a stable full of top tier fighters, someone is not going to be happy no matter what they are making in the dollar department if they feel neglected even for a second.
Go out of your way to please the ego of one guy and you will end up with a chain reaction on your hands quicker than Superman on a caffeine high.
Then, once you think everyone has been satisfied, a whole new series of demands will surface eventually causing the entire operation to crumble from the inside out, leaving you with nothing but what WAS a great concept.
At the moment, GBP seems to be running like a well oiled machine, signing fighter after fighter, and at the pace it is growing, it will be the biggest promotion company in all of boxing history and I truly do hope my instincts are wrong with everything staying smooth as silk.
Just pay close attention to what is going on in your company, or things could boil over with just one bad decision.
So there it is, my attempt of age old wisdom in the classic form of adages. It is the job of those who my advice is directed towards to figure out their true meaning and put them to good use.
Depending on what happens in the future, I will know if I am more suited to hand out these “Expressions of Confusion” like grandma has so many times over the years, or if I am more like Uncle Fred and should just keep my mouth shut.
