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Thread: Any good jokes ????

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  1. #46
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by roberto duran legend View Post
    I didnt beleive my wife at first when she told me Davey Jones had died,
    Then i saw her face
    Is she now a believer

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    I fuck in hate double standards sum bird, get a rampant rabbit an it's seen as'a a bit of naughty fun.
    but when I ordered my 240 volt fistmaster 5000 latex revolving pussy,with elasticated anus and imitation
    shit dribble with breast nipple discharge and seaman collection tray.
    With built in realistic rape cry sound system, I'm known as sum kind of sick pervert.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    2 friends are sitting at a bar drinking and bullshitting, when 1 looks across the bar and sees 2 old guys sitting there drinking. so he says to his friend hey look at the 2 old guys on the other side of the bar, that is going to be us in 20 years. his friend looks at him and says "Thats a Fucking Mirror!"

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by robdux View Post
    2 friends are sitting at a bar drinking and bullshitting, when 1 looks across the bar and sees 2 old guys sitting there drinking. so he says to his friend hey look at the 2 old guys on the other side of the bar, that is going to be us in 20 years. his friend looks at him and says "Thats a Fucking Mirror!"
    2 friends are sitting at a bar drinking and bullshitting, when 1 looks across the bar and sees 2 old guys sitting there drinking. so he says to his friend hey look at the 2 old guys on the other side of the bar, that is going to be us in 20 years. his friend looks at him and says "Thats a Fucking Mirror" And then Charlie comes in and tryies to sucker punch one of the old guys, but the old guy knocks him out with 1 punch!
    God is a concept, By which we can measure, Our pain, I'll say it again, God is a concept, By which we can measure, Our pain, I don't believe in magic, I don't believe in I-ching, I don't believe in bible, I don't believe in tarot, I don't believe in Hitler, I don't believe in Jesus, I don't believe in Kennedy, I don't believe in Buddha, I don't believe in mantra, I don't believe in Gita, I don't believe in yoga, I don't believe in kings, I don't believe in Elvis, I don't believe in Zimmerman, I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me!!


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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    So?

    Where are the good jokes?

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    I wonder what colour a Smurf would go if i was to choke the twat!!

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by BIG H View Post
    2 friends are sitting at a bar drinking and bullshitting, when 1 looks across the bar and sees 2 old guys sitting there drinking. so he says to his friend hey look at the 2 old guys on the other side of the bar, that is going to be us in 20 years. his friend looks at him and says "Thats a Fucking Mirror" And then Charlie comes in and tryies to sucker punch one of the old guys, but the old guy knocks him out with 1 punch!
    damn that is funny, i never thought to add charlie to it. well i guess any joke is funny but its even funnier if it includes methenoff!

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by Ghost View Post
    So?

    Where are the good jokes?
    A man and a woman were driving down the road, arguing about his infidelity when suddenly the woman reached over and sliced the man’s penis off. Angrily, she tossed it out the car window.

    Driving behind the couple was a man and his 6-year-old daughter. The little girl was chatting away at her father when all of a sudden the penis smacked their car windshield, stuck for a moment, and her dad put the wipers on and cleaned it off the screen and drove on like nothing happened.


    After a while, the daughter asked her father, “Daddy, what was that that hit the window?”


    Not wanting to expose his little girl to anything sexual at such a young age, the father replied, “It was only a bug, Honey.”


    The daughter sat with a confused look on her face, and after a moment said.. ”Gee it had a big dick, didn’t it?”
    Hidden Content " border="0" />

    I can explain it.
    But I cant understand it for you.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    A new couple were lying naked in bed and setting some ground rules for sex. The man says to his girlfriend “if I want sex then I will rub your right breast, If I do not want sex then I will rub your left breast”.

    The girlfriend says but what about me. So the boyfriend says “OK if you want sex rub my dick up and down one time but if you do not want sex rub it a thousand times”.
    Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    I went to the shop the other day and said do you have any helicopter flavour crisps, she said nah we only do plane
    Officially the only saddo who has had a girlfriend

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Wife gets home from work to find her husband watching the football
    again. she says, " im leaving you. All you do is talk about football
    and you think about nothing else. Im also seeing someone else.
    He is younger than you, more handsome , tender, understanding,
    treats me like a lady, has a 12inch cock and fucks me everyday."
    " really" replies the husband . " What team does he support ?" .

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Sexiest but Funny
    How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...'
    “Boxing is like jazz. The better it is, the less people appreciate it.”
    - George Foreman

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Told the wife to put her coat on, see said why I'm going to the pub I said I'm I coming as well no
    I'm switching the heating off.

  14. #59
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by Dia bando View Post
    Told the wife to put her coat on, see said why I'm going to the pub I said I'm I coming as well no
    I'm switching the heating off.
    Reading that; I think you just got back from the pub.
    Hidden Content " border="0" />

    I can explain it.
    But I cant understand it for you.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Muamba wakes up to find Torres has scored twice " fuck me, how many years
    was i unconscious "

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