Thread: Went to my first pickup seminar..

First of all I hope this doesn't put me up the top of the rankings of the forums most gayest person..
Secondly, quite proud of myself for getting out of the house finally to do something other than go to work or buy groceries..

I'm on a local pickup forum for my city and they had this company coming to do a 3hour talk thing on confidence etc.. Was pretty good, it wasn't just sit and listen.. There were 4 instructors that worked with us in groups to practice shit.. One group showed us techniques to get into a good relaxed happy state.. Another taught us body language and how to touch a girl when you approach her..
Another taught flirting/role playing, and how to get through a girls cold bitch shield.. Last one taught how to actually approach and have the right energy and what to stay to them..

I learnt that i've got a long way to go.. I felt awkward talking to the girls and shit.. touching them was weird.. Not sure if it was the circumstances with everyone watching you do this drill, but I was not comfortable.. I guess being hulled up in a room with my girlfriend for 4 years without socializing will do that to you...
I'm not really learning to pick up chicks, but I want to be comfortable being able to talk to anyone, anytime, anywhere.. And I don't got that yet..

Anyway, everyone clap and say you're proud... I was hesitating going like I do with everything that is stepping out of the comfort zone.. My girlfriend offered to come with me but I wanted to go on my own to get even more out of my comfort zone... So all done..
They got another seminar/talk from a different company next Monday so might go to that as well and hopefully get to know someone of the reguarl guys, or i'll take a friend this time so i'm not a total loner..

Originally Posted by Dizaster

First of all I hope this doesn't put me up the top of the rankings of the forums most gayest person..
Secondly, quite proud of myself for getting out of the house finally to do something other than go to work or buy groceries..

I'm on a local pickup forum for my city and they had this company coming to do a 3hour talk thing on confidence etc.. Was pretty good, it wasn't just sit and listen.. There were 4 instructors that worked with us in groups to practice shit.. One group showed us techniques to get into a good relaxed happy state.. Another taught us body language and how to touch a girl when you approach her..
Another taught flirting/role playing, and how to get through a girls cold bitch shield.. Last one taught how to actually approach and have the right energy and what to stay to them..

I learnt that i've got a long way to go.. I felt awkward talking to the girls and shit.. touching them was weird.. Not sure if it was the circumstances with everyone watching you do this drill, but I was not comfortable.. I guess being hulled up in a room with my girlfriend for 4 years without socializing will do that to you...
I'm not really learning to pick up chicks, but I want to be comfortable being able to talk to anyone, anytime, anywhere.. And I don't got that yet..

Anyway, everyone clap and say you're proud... I was hesitating going like I do with everything that is stepping out of the comfort zone.. My girlfriend offered to come with me but I wanted to go on my own to get even more out of my comfort zone... So all done..
They got another seminar/talk from a different company next Monday so might go to that as well and hopefully get to know someone of the reguarl guys, or i'll take a friend this time so i'm not a total loner..

no but it probably makes you the saddest.

You touch some random female and you're likely to get smacked/arrested or in to bed in the first day depending on what type of woman you're hitting on. It's a matter of percentages

Let me get this straight. Your girlfriend offered to come with you to a seminar on how to pick up women but you said you'd rather go alone.

Also, where you live in your city they have a local "pickup" forum on the subject and you are a member of this city forum? On how to pick up women.

Originally Posted by CGM

Let me get this straight. Your girlfriend offered to come with you to a seminar on how to pick up women but you said you'd rather go alone.

Also, where you live in your city they have a local "pickup" forum on the subject and you are a member of this city forum? On how to pick up women.

Well done Dizaster I'm proud you took this proactive step mate. Was it expensive?

Originally Posted by CGM

Let me get this straight. Your girlfriend offered to come with you to a seminar on how to pick up women but you said you'd rather go alone.

Also, where you live in your city they have a local "pickup" forum on the subject and you are a member of this city forum? On how to pick up women.

Yes to all that.. It's a long story that i'll have a go at explaining tomorrow..

And it was just $20 Bilbo which is like 8 pounds or something... So it really just covered their time and thats it.

overcoming social anxiety isn't easy.. But as i've posted before, my best method is ignoring it. I don't really have the issues you have, but i still have general anxiety and the occasional panic attack.

You have to learn and always remember that you're feeling the way you feel (anxious) because you're allowing yourself to. I can "think" my way out of a panic attack by asking myself why am i doing this.. to myself..

Sounds stupid, but you need to master ignoring your anxiety. The fact that you went to this seminar makes you, in your head, convinced that you have issues. You need to throw caution to the wind and just DO IT. The girl you're about to approach, or the customer you're about to call does not know you're not confident in yourself. The best way to build your confidence is to fake it at first. Go up to a girl with all of the confidence in the world just to try it out. Be prepared to get rejected, but be happy that you went along and approached her.

I don't really think you need a seminar for that. I mean, who am i to tell you where/how to touch a girl. The fact that you're allowing me to tell you that shows that you already are feeling inferior to me. Therefore, feeding your anxiety/lack of confidence.

From your postings on here, it seems that you keep setting goals for yourself. Like when you said you were going to approach so many girls in so much of a time period. When you say you're going to do those things, you're content with your life, until that time comes, then you fall short of your goal and go back to your "i have social anxiety" phase. Instead, i wouldn't set goals. I'd just go out and do it. Don't think about it, just do it. The human brain/mind is so powerful, it can make you absolutely sick. It can eat you up inside and kill you. But you have to remember, that you're in control.

Originally Posted by Dizaster

Originally Posted by CGM

Let me get this straight. Your girlfriend offered to come with you to a seminar on how to pick up women but you said you'd rather go alone.

Also, where you live in your city they have a local "pickup" forum on the subject and you are a member of this city forum? On how to pick up women.

Yes to all that.. It's a long story that i'll have a go at explaining tomorrow..

And it was just $20 Bilbo which is like 8 pounds or something... So it really just covered their time and thats it.

It seemed a little odd, but I'm sure there's a good explanation. It's all cool, no need to explain unless you want too. It does sound kinda interesting though.

Originally Posted by Dizaster

First of all I hope this doesn't put me up the top of the rankings of the forums most gayest person..
Secondly, quite proud of myself for getting out of the house finally to do something other than go to work or buy groceries..

I'm on a local pickup forum for my city and they had this company coming to do a 3hour talk thing on confidence etc.. Was pretty good, it wasn't just sit and listen.. There were 4 instructors that worked with us in groups to practice shit.. One group showed us techniques to get into a good relaxed happy state.. Another taught us body language and how to touch a girl when you approach her..
Another taught flirting/role playing, and how to get through a girls cold bitch shield.. Last one taught how to actually approach and have the right energy and what to stay to them..

I learnt that i've got a long way to go.. I felt awkward talking to the girls and shit.. touching them was weird.. Not sure if it was the circumstances with everyone watching you do this drill, but I was not comfortable.. I guess being hulled up in a room with my girlfriend for 4 years without socializing will do that to you...
I'm not really learning to pick up chicks, but I want to be comfortable being able to talk to anyone, anytime, anywhere.. And I don't got that yet..

Anyway, everyone clap and say you're proud... I was hesitating going like I do with everything that is stepping out of the comfort zone.. My girlfriend offered to come with me but I wanted to go on my own to get even more out of my comfort zone... So all done..
They got another seminar/talk from a different company next Monday so might go to that as well and hopefully get to know someone of the reguarl guys, or i'll take a friend this time so i'm not a total loner..

Hey if it works and you had/have a bit of an issue with being out going or confedient then I say good for you...Not everyone is the life of the party or even know how to be even thought they have it inside them....

NOw with that being said....

If you said to your girlfriend Saty home after she ffered to go with you so you could possibly score a hug from one of the other guys there well...

Then Yes you are the Gayest Member on Saddo's

The best way to pick Women up is to have a Girlfriend mate... You'll get loads more attention from them when you're in a club/bar where ever and you look like you clearly don't give a fuck.

These lasses tried to chat up me and my mate last night... neither of us single... even after I told her I hadn't had enough to drink to dance with their mate they still wouldn't fuck off!

edit: wait a minute... what the fuck... diz? you have a Girlfriend? Am I missing something here :P

AdamGB is absolutely correct. A guy who has recently started getting lots gives off some kind of vibe that attracts women. I've been through long dry spells before, but it seems like when I am "back in the saddle", suddenly other opportunities start to present themselves.

A pick up seminar??!! I'm studying the wrong subject obviously. Good for you Diz, hope you learned a few things.

The whole art of picking up women is a mystery to me too. Of course, I've hooked up in bars, but have typically been incredibly drunk. And it's usually the brazen hussies who have approached me! Though this was perhaps not always so, a drunken mind is often a very hazy mind.

I havent hooked up with a different woman in years either, and would have no idea where to begin. Seminars like that sound like one area to explore. Though my Mrs probably wouldn't be as liberal as yours!

Originally Posted by Howlin Mad Missy

You touch some random female and you're likely to get smacked/arrested or in to bed in the first day depending on what type of woman you're hitting on. It's a matter of percentages

Missy these were my 1st toughts...

Diz, good luck man and I hope it all works out for you.