Thread: I would like some advice. Some serious and some comedic.

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I need some advice but would appreciate to keep it off facebook since I have quite a few of you on there too and I consider almost all of you pretty good friends. We have spent more time together than most anyone else.

Okay, well I have a recurring theme in my life right now.

I have a girlfriend who I absolutely love. She is a little older than me and going through a divorce. She married a person and stuck it out way too long in a shitty situation. She has really made me happy and a great asset in my life.

Anyway, I also have a best friend who I do absolutely everything with. This is the best guy in the world. We are great friends and hang out several times a week hunting or working on the farm together. He also has a girlfriend. In one isolated incident last year, I made out with her. Or really just kissed her a couple times. We all were completely shit faced. My best friend said he was walking home, but ended up sleeping in our barn. Another friend was arrested but the police ultimately released him.
Anyway, kissed her a few times. Felt absolutely awful about it and told my best friend and he didn't seem to mind that much. But he is a top notch guy. The thing is I never really had feelings for this girl whatsoever. Just a shit-faced both of us there sort of time. But this girl still likes me alot. Maybe not like boyfriend-girlfriend, but genuinely likes to have me around.

So, I told my current girlfriend that happened because she asked why this girl was so fond of me. I think this was the wrong thing to do.
I tell everything because I am open and honest and admit mistakes. I love my gf and am proud she dates me and don't bat an eye at other dames.
Now, this is creating a huge problem in my life. My gf is concerned about this girl. She gets pissed off about it all the time. And I love my best friend too. I spend alot of time with both but feel like my gf is trying to get me to choose.
Like I am getting punished for spending time with my bf. Also his girl just posted a pic of me on facebook which was a long time before we met and was just me and a few mates camping, but now she is really weird just because of that.
Please advise.

Cliff,

I could have sworn you told us your best friends girl hated you at 1 point and was trying to get you out of his life?

Or was that another BF?

Originally Posted by JT Rock

Cliff,

I could have sworn you told us your best friends girl hated you at 1 point and was trying to get you out of his life?

Or was that another BF?

That was probably the same girl. For a very long time this girl didn't like me or talk to me at all. In fact one time I made her cry when drinking and felt poorly about it.

She slowly began to trust me and now we can talk often. She is very loyal to me.
This particular girl does not warm up to anyone very fast, and treated my family the same way and other people. Just takes her a very long time to open up.

I just feel shit about it all.

Originally Posted by boozeboxer

Originally Posted by JT Rock

Cliff,

I could have sworn you told us your best friends girl hated you at 1 point and was trying to get you out of his life?

Or was that another BF?

That was probably the same girl. For a very long time this girl didn't like me or talk to me at all. In fact one time I made her cry when drinking and felt poorly about it.

She slowly began to trust me and now we can talk often. She is very loyal to me.
This particular girl does not warm up to anyone very fast, and treated my family the same way and other people. Just takes her a very long time to open up.

I just feel shit about it all.

There are consequences for our actions in life and repercussions. I don't know if there is any answer or advice for you.

Im sure there are good days and bad days. In a girls eyes if you fooled around once you will do it again, she is protecting her territory. In her comfort zone removing the situation all together is her solution. Hence thats why she is suggesting you choose.

Your going to have to hope that she can be trusting and comfortable, I would hope you wouldn't do that again with your buddies girl and that may be the case. Maybe you can cut back on playful flirting and interactions you COULD be having that may be hurting your girl...

Obviously you know that there might, at some point down the road, be a point where either you have to choose or your girlfriend makes the choice for you. You can try and guide and reassure your gf that there is no threat from this girl, and that you are totally into her and deliver the genuine compliments that will not sound fake. I'm pretty sure there's no guaranteed way of making sure the gf can actually get over this, maybe a worst case scenario would be to present a case that you are willing to break of friendship with this girl, but to do it in such a way where your gf would have to be a complete bitch to ask you to do that. It's manipulative, but I'm sure your conscience can handle it.

Alternatively, get really drunk with the both of them, then ask if they fancy a threesome.

You may speculate as to which aspect here is the more laughable of my advice.

I agree. The problem is I would never choose to not have my best friend around. He helps me all the time. We have a great time together and he is invaluable to the family operation.

I know we pay for what we do. But if my best mate doesn't have a problem with it, I would think a girl I told because I am honest and who I care for deeply would understand.


I also think this girl is 'the one', but I am just worn out with all the shit. I know she is in a very stressful situation, but it isn't a bed of roses (as rhun would put it (great site)) on this side either. I am a very practical guy and about tired of all the drama and the thought has at least crossed my mind to just give up.

Considering that you did kiss this girl once, I can understand a bit why your girlfriend is not exactly fond on the other girl. Perhaps you could talk to your friend and explain her the situation and see how she feels(i.e make sure she's not in love with you and doesn,t dare to say it) in order to make sure to hurt no one, if the ground's clear, you could perhaps get her to talk to your girlfriend in order to reassure her... or match her with one of your good friend so jealousy's no more an issue

This girlfriend, is she legally seperated and moving forward on divorce or waiting? I dunno dude but sounds like alot is you need to decide what you want. I get current gf bugging out a bit and though she's ticked it's good you told her. Giving what she's coming out of I can see her looking over your shoulder. You ready for that? The friend man, you cannot replace longtime bros who have experienced the best and worst of you. Has she ever expressed concern that she could be pitting two best friends against one another?

If your girlfriend is being jealous and possessive about you being friends with another girl (who may or may not have romantic feelings towards you), I'd say that's a pretty big red flag.

Sorry, I'm still stuck on the part where you said that you had a girlfriend.

You actually found a girl that likes you?

It's pretty simple Booze.

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You're fucked.

Originally Posted by Diane

Sorry, I'm still stuck on the part where you said that you had a girlfriend.

You actually found a girl that likes you?

Originally Posted by Diane

Sorry, I'm still stuck on the part where you said that you had a girlfriend.

You actually found a girl that likes you?

This caused me to spit out my tea too.

I'm fucking single, lonely as hell and reduced to peeping on my neighbours through a spy hole in my door for titillation and Booze, not only has a girlfriend, but another girl on the side.

FML.

Originally Posted by Bilbo

Originally Posted by Diane

Sorry, I'm still stuck on the part where you said that you had a girlfriend.

You actually found a girl that likes you?

This caused me to spit out my tea too.

I'm fucking single, lonely as hell and reduced to peeping on my neighbours through a spy hole in my door for titillation and Booze, not only has a girlfriend, but another girl on the side.

FML.

But at least you're not married, right?

Originally Posted by CFH

Originally Posted by Bilbo

Originally Posted by Diane

Sorry, I'm still stuck on the part where you said that you had a girlfriend.

You actually found a girl that likes you?

This caused me to spit out my tea too.

I'm fucking single, lonely as hell and reduced to peeping on my neighbours through a spy hole in my door for titillation and Booze, not only has a girlfriend, but another girl on the side.

FML.

But at least you're not married, right?

That is true. At the moment I'm at rock bottom, in a hole and can't manage to climb out. But if I do at least I'm free. Being married would be like still being in the hole, but the hole being in my possession and I'm tied to the mortgage payments, so before I can even think of climbing out I you first have to pay off that debt.

Ok heres how my mind went as I read through it ,this wont help you at all but it will make you realize the craziness that goes on the heads of the people who you choose to call friends.

Originally Posted by boozeboxer

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I need some advice but would appreciate to keep it off facebook OK let take it there right now. since I have quite a few of you on there too and I consider almost all of you pretty good friends. We have spent more time together than most anyone else Sad ommision. Will ignore in case I have a simular problem.

Okay, well I have a recurring theme in my life right now.We'll we are creatures of habit

I have a girlfriend who I absolutely love I wonder if shes a honey? She is a little older than me Fuck her off things will only get uglier from here on in and going through a divorce.Is he jealous will he sneak through the snow one night and kill you both? She married a person and stuck it out way too long in a shitty situation . She has really made me happy and a great asset in my life She gives head and money.

Anyway, I also have a best friend who I do absolutely everything with Is it a younger girl?. This is the best guy in the world.Ahh shit dude. We are great friends and hang out several times a week hunting or working on the farm together Ahh damn its broke back fukkin mountain . He also has a girlfriend. In one isolated incident last year, I made out with her.Oh thank fuk. Or really just kissed her a couple times.On the moot right !? We all were completely shit faced. My best friend said he was walking home, but ended up sleeping in our barn. Another friend was arrested but the police ultimately released him. (was he tense ?) I need a realese too, hmm the misses is still in the cot too hang on BRB)
Anyway, kissed her a few times. Felt absolutely awful about it Did she taste of puke?and told my best friend and he didn't seem to mind that much. But he is a top notch guy. Well your mate is a keeper. The thing is I never really had feelings for this girl whatsoever. Just a shit-faced both of us there sort of time. But this girl still likes me alot. Maybe not like boyfriend-girlfriend, but genuinely likes to have me around.

So, I told my current girlfriend that happened because she asked why this girl was so fond of me. "Ohh Stimpy you eeediiooot" I think this was the wrong thing to do.
I tell everything because I am open and honest and admit mistakes. I love my gf and am proud she dates me and don't bat an eye at other dames. You sound like Lyle
Now, this is creating a huge problem in my life Hahaha you bought it. My gf is concerned about this girl.Shit eh that a bit of shock She gets pissed off about it all the time. And I love my best friend too this just got creepy again. I spend alot of time with both but feel like my gf is trying to get me to choose. Maybe you are all about to become swingers
Like I am getting punished for spending time with my bf Oh dude I really wouldnt say that in public not even here. Also his girl just posted a pic of me on facebook which was a long time before we met and was just me and a few mates camping,Its not all about you then sunshine, but now she is really weird just because of that oh your misses is weird not the bf's gf.
Please advise.

Foursome.

Ok I just realized BF means best friend not boy friend.

Oh and dont forget to listen to JJ Cales five album there it bops nice you Hick country folk will love it.