Esteemed Mr. Klitschko:

I give up. For years I've wanted to see someone rise from the ranks and test your chin and your mettle. For years I've wanted to see someone provide that epic fight I've been desperate for in the heavyweight ranks. You know..... like Ali-Frazier, Lennox-Vitali, Tyson-Douglas. Admittedly, I don't like your style of boxing. But also admittedly, you've been very effective at it. It's not your fault most boxers who enter the ring with you do so with 5 pounds of shit in their trunks, and proceed to put on a shameful exhibition of survival. And I don't blame you for keeping your distance, being content with doing just enough to win the fight. After all, that's what it's all about, right? I was a hater back when you couldn't protect your fragile chin, and got knocked out on several occasions. But we all have a right to learn, right? The late Emanuel Stewart taught you well. He taught you how to use your reach, your height, and your opponents' fear.... and keep that chin safe. Doesn't make for very exciting boxing... but then again you've amassed a great record since then. Nowadays... us former heavyweight divisions fans are treated to nothing but an endless parade of bums, pretenders, has-beens..... all clamoring for a shot at you, but doing nothing to earn such a shot. Because of that, you're reduced to fighting the Francesco Pianeta's of the world. Even going through the scrap heap twice, like with Tony Thompson.

I used to want someone to challenge you. To give as well as take. Maybe even knock you down. Just to make you get up and show an additional dimension to your game. A fight that would have everyone buzzing and saying..... "DAMN.... did you see that fight?!?" (And no.... Samuel Peter did not provide that epic fight..... TWICE). I've been practically begging for that fight. And some of these other guys talk a lot before the fight (ie: David Haye). Then they go out there and stink up the joint. Sure, I'm mad at you too. He talked so much shit, you should've made it your business to go out and try to knock him out. But you didn't. You fought Sultan Ibragimov and almost made me quit watching boxing altogether. With all due respect, Wlad..... what a SHIT fight. All that pawing for 12 rounds. 12 rounds!!!

BUT... I've changed my mind, Wlad. You're 37 now. You've amassed a great record. Now I want you to retire. Only that way will we be able to turn our eyes to the riff-raff out there that masquerades as a heavyweight division. Hell... if there's nothing else to watch, we can watch them fight themselves, right? Someone's got to emerge champion of something.

Thanks,
A boxing fan







Dear Boxing Fan:

I appreciate your concern. But I'd rather fight on for a few more years and accumulate a few more scalps under my belt. I paid my dues early on, and now I deserve the chance to blow away a few more nondescript bums before calling it a career.

Yours truly,
Wlad Klitschko



(Just thought I'd add that as a preemptive strike to the "Dear TitoFan go fuck yourself", obligatory response.)