Undisputed Heavyweight Champ? I know who it will be

I will answer the question everyone has been asking, not ‘Where do girls pee from?’ (Note – I am working on finding that out soon, stay with me boys) but ‘Who can be the next Undisputed Champion?’

After staying up all Saturday night, keeping myself spry with lots of pints (of ice cold milk), I watched in pure boredom as Wladimir Klitschko danced like a Galien and kept back handing this small fat Russian.

I was shocked, this isn’t what heavyweight boxing is all about. Where was the posing? The deadly man stare? It didn’t even look like he had a drop of baby oil on his body. Was I disappointed? Yes. Yes I was.

As I did some shadow boxing in front of the mirror I picture myself destroying Klitschko very easily. I’m in good shape and have the tools to defeat him. 5 foot 4 inches, 154 pounds of pure man. I would simply walk into the ring, rip off my shirt and systematically dismantle the giant (although I am pretty tall myself) with a series of flexing and dance moves never before seen.

I’ve handled big guys before, in a non-gay way. And if push came to shove and we had to punch each other I’m quite sure that with those big leather gloves on they would protect my hands so they wouldn’t get scuffed which can prove to be painful.

All I can recall from the small fat Russians corner, what’s his name, Ibfuckinshiit, was his trainer saying “Well done, you filthy Russian dog, when his back is turned, pull out your pistol and shoot this mother fucker.”
The cowards.

Can you imagine Bruce Willis (Please Note – I am NOT Bruce Willis) doing someone from behind, no pun intended? I certainly can’t. I guess they don’t have manly shows like Thundercats in Russia.

So I have been eating extra coco pops and manwhiches in order to go from 154 lbs to 245 lbs. I think it will take me another 8 or maybe 9 days to get there.

Yours in manliness,

Fantana

.....I thought you were a fan of Audley Harrison???




crazy bastard

What Just Happened?

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Originally Posted by Lyle

.....I thought you were a fan of Audley Harrison???




crazy bastard

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Well he is a great fighter and until his comeback in June it gives me plenty of time to shake up the division, in a non-gay way.

enjoyed your youtube video mate..:cool:

Good stuff.

That was a very insiteful 10,000th post mate mad me laugh especially with the quote from Pride of Boston saying "what just happened" ;D

for some of the new guys who do not know this guy was a regular around here and very well liked be most... got to 9999 posts and decided not to post again because it was a cool number to finish on that was about 2 or maybe even 3 years ago.

good to see you mate ;)

Over 2 years.. quite impressive

but

I told ya so.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Saddo

That was a very insiteful 10,000th post mate mad me laugh especially with the quote from Pride of Boston saying "what just happened" ;D

for some of the new guys who do not know this guy was a regular around here and very well liked be most... got to 9999 posts and decided not to post again because it was a cool number to finish on that was about 2 or maybe even 3 years ago.

good to see you mate ;)

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Thanks Saddo.

For those of you who don't know - Saddo really is as ugly as his avatar picture says. Infact, his uglier.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Fenster

Over 2 years.. quite impressive

but

I told ya so.

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BUT

The forum change servers hence in reality (did we ever find out what that was? ha) we are on a NEW forum and thus I am now allowed to come out of retirement and post at will.

name has been changed mate.

In other words

you're tired of abusing craig david kids?

;D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Saddo

name has been changed mate.

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Ta.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Fenster

In other words

you're tired of abusing craig david kids?

;D

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Yeah well none of them will talk to me anymore, even the ones I met in real life (Please Note - They were aged 16 and over)

After watching Klitschko "fight" I just knew a return was on the cards.

That and Mad_Dog kept sending me emails.

*What a breath of fresh air it is to Fantana on here....












*Of course in a non-gay way.

Um......Quite.

that was one of the funniest posts I have read in a long time. reminds me of the ol days when we were small in number and all extremely funny.

everyone should really look out for this fantana. He is greatness personified. He is also a future author and everyone should read his book.

I for one am waiting with bated breath to the answer where do girls pee from? I have been married for over ten years and I have not the foggiest....

good to see you back son (in a non-gay way ;) )

told you it was time for you to return

you ALL should read Fantana's book. I finished it yesterday and have to say it had me in tears of laughter on the train a few times - check it out.

Can he become heavyweight champion of the world - quite possibly but will he have the heart to hammer his idol Audley Harrison :rolleyes: