Audley looked AMAZING, next champ

Audley Harrison, the British 2000 Olympic Super Heavyweight Gold medallist, former WBF Heavyweight champion and currently on a comeback trail starting, stated that he was told in no uncertain terms that he had to look good on the Joe Calzaghe undercard.


He may have said something along the lines of, “I was told I had to look good, so I went out, had a manicure. Ate some lobster. Had a massage, relaxed, bought myself some new threads, clean socks. Then I had my hair done, brushed my teeth, covered myself in oil and I went into the ring against a tough opponent.”


Unfortunately nobody told Audley that he was meant to look good in the ring, by boxing. Boxing is a sport where the winner is decided by who has landed the best shots, who worked the hardest or who made the least racial slurs in the build up to the fight.
Audley stated on his performance “You didn’t see all the good tonight. As you can tell, when I went down and had myself I feel the guy didn’t want to know, he just crumbled. When I work the body, gosh, it’s summmmmit else.”


Audley won his fight in the fifth round when he went for a nipple twist but mistimed it and ended up battering his opponents ribcage. Questions were asked about Audley possibly fighting David Haye, the undisputed Cruiserweight Champion. Audley said something like, “It would be a sexy fight. We both have buff bodies, nice abs, and Haye used to do modelling which I could have done if I wasn’t so set on boxing, you know? Definitely a sexy fight, we would fill Wembley stadium. It would be intense, sexy, very sexy, boxing isn’t normally sexy. I make it sexy. It would be entertaining, and have this intense sexual atmosphere. We both have slightly overshot jaws and this is why were chinny, no pun intended, and this would make for a sexual fight. Mmmmm, mmmm, bitch.”

Yours in manliness,
Fantana

Oh dear..

:confused:

Yeah he's the next champ of Imagination Land

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsgQcQbUG2M

Where they find this queer?

The obvious sarcasm appears to be wasted on you retards...

...It's not lost on me, I am just not going to waste my time reading the rantings of Fantana...I know I rant but for the most part it's not nonsensical jibberish

I rank you and Fantana about the same... :lickish: ;)

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Originally Posted by AdamGB

I rank you and Fantana about the same... :lickish: ;)

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That's funny. I rank you an Fagtana about the same as well

HAHA, funny sh*t mate;)

So true though.

Audley in terms of boxing has mediocre power, quite good stamina, CRAP CHIN AND NO FUKIN BALLS EITHER!

After he won olympic gold he couldve done well for himself, if only he had some balls and wanted to actually succeed in boxing, instead he became a minor celebrity in the uk and just boxed bums, didnt improve his skills and managed to lose any 'heart' in the ring that he once had (not that much anyway)...focusses on not getting hurt so much that he ends up pathetic or ko'd against a fighter coming at him.

He just looks like hes getting in the ring scared.

I think it'll be so funny to watch david haye fight him, i have a lot of time for haye because he is a very exciting fighter, he will come at audley from round 1 and try to take his chin off lol.

Will be so funny to see haye chase him around the ring, in 2-3 rounds itll be over and audley will be on the floor.

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Originally Posted by Violent Demise

Quote:

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Originally Posted by AdamGB

I rank you and Fantana about the same... :lickish: ;)

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That's funny. I rank you an Fagtana about the same as well

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Amazing.

as soon as I saw the title of the post I thought - who the fuck has posted this !!

then I saw it was a certain Fantana

Suddenly everything made sense....;)

I remember his management asking me if I wanted the job of training him. I said no he cant fight,;D still cant.

Did anyone see the documentary about the bloke who fought Harrison in his first pro fight?

It was quite interesting, the bloke is a bit of a lad to say the least !

I think Harrison still has concussion from Sprotts left hook.

The bloke thinks he is going to be a world champion. We all need to aim for something but please. World champ. Not of boxing that is for certain.

Getting the WBF off Rachels Sister (Dutch bloke) does not count.