How many kids does it take....................

Ok this is a sort of philosophical question that I saw on a website forum a couple of years ago. It generated loads of thought and humourous discussion so I thought I'd share it here.

Ok, here it is,

The Challenge

You are in a sports hall where you will be in a fight to the death involving you and an infinite number of 5 year old children.

The children have been trained, as best as kids can be, to take you down by swarming on you, and grappling and forcing you to the ground where they will then kick , punch and bite you to death.

You have to fend them off for as long as possible. You are all unarmed.

The question is how many kids could you kill before they overpowered you and what would your survival tactics be?

Now some of you may think you could never be killed by a bunch of 5 year olds, but remember they will keep coming indefinitely so eventually you will succumb, but after how long?

Whoever comes up with a higer score (more kills) than somebody else, has to justify it with a thourough analysis of why and how.



PS. This is pure speculation only and I in no way endorse beating up small children :P

Well perhaps just the really annoying ones

IF ITS TO THE DEATH THEN I SEE MYSELF BEING ABLE TO LAST ABOUT 10 HOURS BEFORE BECOMING EXHAUSTED...  I AM SIX FEET TALL AND 195 LBS...  FAIRLY ATHLETIC...  IM 24 YRS OLD...  IM  A SMOKER, THOUGH...  I WOULD GET INTO A CORNER SO MOST OF MY BACK AND SIDE IS COVERED SO THEY CAN ONLY COME STRAIGHT @ ME AND SNAP THERE NECKS AS THEY COME SO AS TO USE THE LEAST AMOUNT OF ENERGY POSSIBLE...  I SEE ME SLAUGHTERING 300-350 CHILDREN DUE TO MY SIZE AND ATHLETIC ABILITY...  COME @ ME RUGRATS

YOU MAY TAKE OUR LIVES BUT YOU'LL NEVER TAKE...........OUR FREEEEEDOOOMMMMMMMMMMM......CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!1

CC, BILBO

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

IF ITS TO THE DEATH THEN I SEE MYSELF BEING ABLE TO LAST ABOUT 10 HOURS BEFORE BECOMING EXHAUSTED... I AM SIX FEET TALL AND 195 LBS... FAIRLY ATHLETIC... IM 24 YRS OLD... IM A SMOKER, THOUGH... I WOULD GET INTO A CORNER SO MOST OF MY BACK AND SIDE IS COVERED SO THEY CAN ONLY COME STRAIGHT @ ME AND SNAP THERE NECKS AS THEY COME SO AS TO USE THE LEAST AMOUNT OF ENERGY POSSIBLE... I SEE ME SLAUGHTERING 300-350 CHILDREN DUE TO MY SIZE AND ATHLETIC ABILITY... COME @ ME RUGRATS

YOU MAY TAKE OUR LIVES BUT YOU'LL NEVER TAKE...........OUR FREEEEEDOOOMMMMMMMMMMM......CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!1

CC, BILBO

---

:coolclick:

Good call, I like the idea of taking to the corner, myself I was thinking maybe stick to the centre of the hall, and grab the first child by the hands and swing them violently around in a cirlce, Neo style and take out several at once with his feet. This would use a lot of energy though so you would be exhausted after about 15 minutes. :-\

It depends on how many kids converge on me at once. If they let them out in swarms of 10 I could last a very, very, very long time. I would disloacted their arms and break their necks. It doesn't take much energy to do that. I think I could last 24 hours or so...

If it were rigged so that every time you killed a child he was replaced by a new one they might overtake me in 8 hours.

If the little monsters kept coming and coming and coming without pause, making it 100 against 1 or even worse than they might take me out in 3 hours...

I think I could kill 1,500 children before they took me out.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by BoxingGorilla

It depends on how many kids converge on me at once. If they let them out in swarms of 10 I could last a very, very, very long time. I would disloacted their arms and break their necks. It doesn't take much energy to do that. I think I could last 24 hours or so...

If it were rigged so that every time you killed a child he was replaced by a new one they might overtake me in 8 hours.

If the little monsters kept coming and coming and coming without pause, making it 100 against 1 or even worse than they might take me out in 3 hours...

I think I could kill 1,500 children before they took me out.

---

No no boxing gorilla they come out waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayy quicker than that. Think Matrix Reloaded when Neo is fighting Agent Smith, hundreds at once, leaping at you, jumping, biting, kicking, completely swarming. I reckon in reality a person could last less than 20 minutes.

Imagine 10 kids jumping on your back, 5 kids pulling each legs, another 10 or so on your arms. These are suicidal, kamikaze rabid frenzied kids who know no fear!

Trust me you wouldn't kill 1500!

Just a thought, I really wish someone would make a web game of this ;D
:cwm21: :cwm23:

"No no boxing gorilla they come out waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayy quicker than that.  Think Matrix Reloaded when Neo is fighting Agent Smith, hundreds at once, leaping at you, jumping, biting, kicking, completely swarming. I reckon in reality a person could last less than 20 minutes.

Imagine 10 kids jumping on your back, 5 kids pulling each legs, another 10 or so on your arms. These are suicidal, kamikaze rabid frenzied kids who know no fear!
Trust me you wouldn't kill 1500!"


   Okay.  I'll wager that I could slaughter 15 child assassins and injury 30 or more before they piled on so heavy that I couldn't move

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by BoxingGorilla

Okay. I'll wager that I could slaughter 15 child assassins and injury 30 or more before they piled on so heavy that I couldn't move

---

Sounds reasonable, PrideofProvidence still leads then...........

:crowd: :smash:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

IF ITS TO THE DEATH THEN I SEE MYSELF BEING ABLE TO LAST ABOUT 10 HOURS BEFORE BECOMING EXHAUSTED... I AM SIX FEET TALL AND 195 LBS... FAIRLY ATHLETIC... IM 24 YRS OLD... IM A SMOKER, THOUGH... I WOULD GET INTO A CORNER SO MOST OF MY BACK AND SIDE IS COVERED SO THEY CAN ONLY COME STRAIGHT @ ME AND SNAP THERE NECKS AS THEY COME SO AS TO USE THE LEAST AMOUNT OF ENERGY POSSIBLE... I SEE ME SLAUGHTERING 300-350 CHILDREN DUE TO MY SIZE AND ATHLETIC ABILITY... COME @ ME RUGRATS

YOU MAY TAKE OUR LIVES BUT YOU'LL NEVER TAKE...........OUR FREEEEEDOOOMMMMMMMMMMM......CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!1

CC, BILBO

---

I hope your kidding. You wouldn't get past 50.

INTHE CORNER I WOULD... THIS IS GETTING MORBID BUT IF ITS LIFE AND DEATH.................THIS IS GROSS BUT.........................................OK ID TEAR OPEN ONE OF THE BASTARDS AND PULL A FEW RIBBS OFF AND USE THEM AS STABBING WEAPONS...........ID DO ANYTHING TO SURVIVE

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

INTHE CORNER I WOULD... THIS IS GETTING MORBID BUT IF ITS LIFE AND DEATH.................THIS IS GROSS BUT.........................................OK ID TEAR OPEN ONE OF THE BASTARDS AND PULL A FEW RIBBS OFF AND USE THEM AS STABBING WEAPONS...........ID DO ANYTHING TO SURVIVE

---

:kar:

I'd love to see your bosses face if she caught you writing that!

CANT EVEN BELIEVE I WROTE THAT... THATS GROSS BUT....HEY. AND YES I'D BE DEAD

WHAT? NOONE ELSE....?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

WHAT? NOONE ELSE....?

---

I dunno bud, maybe it's just you and me who are sick?

Someone just sc me in silence, sneaky fuckers,

I would try my best to graphically kill the first one with as much violence as possible.....knockin the first one down stomping the head till I see brains then start pointing at the next one I was going to kill.....and the next....I would want that one to have the fear of God in him/her as I pointed than ripped that little throat with my teeth!!!!.....I would jam my thumbs in as many eyes as I could trying my best to blind a ton of them so I could kill them at will.......How's that???????

im guessing id last about 10 minutes and kill about 10 poor litle kiddies... :'(

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by 1st rd ko

im guessing id last about 10 minutes and kill about 10 poor litle kiddies... :'(

---

you gotta blind them!!!!!!

Pick one of them up by the legs and use him to beat the others with? Oh, and can I wear a cup?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bigragu

I would try my best to graphically kill the first one with as much violence as possible.....knockin the first one down stomping the head till I see brains then start pointing at the next one I was going to kill.....and the next....I would want that one to have the fear of God in him/her as I pointed than ripped that little throat with my teeth!!!!.....I would jam my thumbs in as many eyes as I could trying my best to blind a ton of them so I could kill them at will.......How's that???????

---

Nice plan but these are kamikaze frenzied rabid infested kids, drooling and foaming at the mouth, knowing no fear. Think Dawn of the Dead, evil little motherfuckers.

I like the blinding idea though, maybe they would get confused and turn on each other? :jabbing:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bigragu

I would try my best to graphically kill the first one with as much violence as possible.....knockin the first one down stomping the head till I see brains then start pointing at the next one I was going to kill.....and the next....I would want that one to have the fear of God in him/her as I pointed than ripped that little throat with my teeth!!!!.....I would jam my thumbs in as many eyes as I could trying my best to blind a ton of them so I could kill them at will.......How's that???????

---

Nice plan but these are kamikaze frenzied rabid infested kids, drooling and foaming at the mouth, knowing no fear. Think Dawn of the Dead, evil little motherfuckers.

I like the blinding idea though, maybe they would get confused and turn on each other? :jabbing:

---

that was another part of the plan.....they would feel around in their darkness and attack whatever they found...Hopefully it wouldn't be me.....

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bigragu

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bigragu

I would try my best to graphically kill the first one with as much violence as possible.....knockin the first one down stomping the head till I see brains then start pointing at the next one I was going to kill.....and the next....I would want that one to have the fear of God in him/her as I pointed than ripped that little throat with my teeth!!!!.....I would jam my thumbs in as many eyes as I could trying my best to blind a ton of them so I could kill them at will.......How's that???????

---

Nice plan but these are kamikaze frenzied rabid infested kids, drooling and foaming at the mouth, knowing no fear. Think Dawn of the Dead, evil little motherfuckers.

I like the blinding idea though, maybe they would get confused and turn on each other? :jabbing:

---

that was another part of the plan.....they would feel around in their darkness and attack whatever they found...Hopefully it wouldn't be me.....

---

Maybe after you've killed a few you could chuck their flesh to the other blinded ones and start a feeding frenzy. Hopefully they would all tear each other apart. All you would need to keep a couple of splattered kids near by that you could break off a few limbs to chuck at the pack.

All you need is this guy in your corner. The kids would back out claiming some sort of injury...


http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshot...cksonmug1.html .... :'(

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bigragu

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bigragu

I would try my best to graphically kill the first one with as much violence as possible.....knockin the first one down stomping the head till I see brains then start pointing at the next one I was going to kill.....and the next....I would want that one to have the fear of God in him/her as I pointed than ripped that little throat with my teeth!!!!.....I would jam my thumbs in as many eyes as I could trying my best to blind a ton of them so I could kill them at will.......How's that???????

---

Nice plan but these are kamikaze frenzied rabid infested kids, drooling and foaming at the mouth, knowing no fear. Think Dawn of the Dead, evil little motherfuckers.

I like the blinding idea though, maybe they would get confused and turn on each other? :jabbing:

---

that was another part of the plan.....they would feel around in their darkness and attack whatever they found...Hopefully it wouldn't be me.....

---

Maybe after you've killed a few you could chuck their flesh to the other blinded ones and start a feeding frenzy. Hopefully they would all tear each other apart. All you would need to keep a couple of splattered kids near by that you could break off a few limbs to chuck at the pack.

---

yeah....kinda like an insane lunch lady/guy......here's your sloppy joes!!!!!!!

Easily...i would last forever because i would tell them that santa claus, the tooth fairy and the easter bunny dont exist then you have a bunch of infinite 5yr olds rolling around crying ;D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Snakey

Easily...i would last forever because i would tell them that santa claus, the tooth fairy and the easter bunny dont exist then you have a bunch of infinite 5yr olds rolling around crying ;D

---

Hmm I dunno, kids can get pretty upset and angry when they think you are telling them lies..............

Break out a copy of Barney (or whatever 5 year olds watch these days) put it in your portable dvd... :baby: :badass: "die children! die!"

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by 1st rd ko

Break out a copy of Barney (or whatever 5 year olds watch these days) put it in your portable dvd... :baby: :badass: "die children! die!"

---

:coolclick: to Snakey and 1st Rnd Ko

It's funny I half expected to get a load of sadclicks and the thread banned. What I find so funny is that everyone who has posted on this has just detailed how they would kill all these poor children as if it's just another thread.


Seriously, you all sicken me :P

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by 1st rd ko

Break out a copy of Barney (or whatever 5 year olds watch these days) put it in your portable dvd... :baby: :badass: "die children! die!"

---

:coolclick: to Snakey and 1st Rnd Ko

It's funny I half expected to get a load of sadclicks and the thread banned. What I find so funny is that everyone who has posted on this has just detailed how they would kill all these poor children as if it's just another thread.


Seriously, you all sicken me :P

---

you sicken me as well! (you did start this evil thread). but CC back at you. Wonder what good ole royal would do in this situation? o yea, he call up his lord Kessler. 1st RD KO children
!

they win--an infinite number of 5 yr old kids means--they will never stop attcking--kill 5--there will always b 5 more--so they will attack until u r exhausted then-10,000 will gang up on u and kill u

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by undefeated

they win--an infinite number of 5 yr old kids means--they will never stop attcking--kill 5--there will always b 5 more--so they will attack until u r exhausted then-10,000 will gang up on u and kill u

---

Well done for grasping that, but the question is not who would win, but how long could you survive, and how many could you kill before they got you?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by undefeated

they win--an infinite number of 5 yr old kids means--they will never stop attcking--kill 5--there will always b 5 more--so they will attack until u r exhausted then-10,000 will gang up on u and kill u

---

Well done for grasping that, but the question is not who would win, but how long could you survive, and how many could you kill before they got you?

---

like i said kill 10 in 10 minutes...then its some "28 days later" movie (unless i bring my secret weapon. BARNEY on dvd).

i would take out an infinite wave, there is NO question, they would have to be at least 9 years old for any amount to be a threat

HOW HAS THIS NOT BEEN BANNED YET... WE ARE TALKING IN DETAIL ABOUT KILLING 5 YR OLDS ;D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

HOW HAS THIS NOT BEEN BANNED YET... WE ARE TALKING IN DETAIL ABOUT KILLING 5 YR OLDS ;D

---

Yeah actually I think the apathy from non posting members is worse than the stuff some of you sick and twisted types have posted here :P

;D HAHA SO TRU......WAIT.....WAHTS THAT? ........ OH MY GOD. THEY FOUND ME.....AAAAAHHHHHHH THE CHILDREN.... THERES HUNDREDS.........**GET OFF ME.....***MY LEGS.... OWWW QUIT BITING YOU****BASTARDS....AHHHHHH HELP........!!!!!!!!!IUGFIEUGUIFGEQIFIAHCVBV EBFI

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

;D  HAHA SO TRU......WAIT.....WAHTS THAT? ........  OH MY GOD.  THEY FOUND ME.....AAAAAHHHHHHH  THE CHILDREN....  THERES HUNDREDS.........**GET OFF ME.....***MY LEGS....  OWWW  QUIT BITING YOU****BASTARDS....AHHHHHH  HELP........!!!!!!!!!IUGFIEUGUIFGEQIFIAHCVBV          EBFI

---

Man you are a bunch of sick fuks!!!!!remember though as your killing the "SHAUN OF THE DEAD" little demonic priks that bodies will accumulate and you can stack bodies in the corner and get an elevated position as to attack better!!!!! I dont know how many I could kill but 5'10 195 doing mma and a Small amount of Filipino KunTao I guess my chances would be better since I would rely on technique instead of mostly strength,so I can conserve energy better....I must admit though its a sad thought to have to ponder the scenario :'(

http://www.lazylaces.com/pics/center...f_the_dead.jpg

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by jtrock

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

;D HAHA SO TRU......WAIT.....WAHTS THAT? ........ OH MY GOD. THEY FOUND ME.....AAAAAHHHHHHH THE CHILDREN.... THERES HUNDREDS.........**GET OFF ME.....***MY LEGS.... OWWW QUIT BITING YOU****BASTARDS....AHHHHHH HELP........!!!!!!!!!IUGFIEUGUIFGEQIFIAHCVBV EBFI

---

Man you are a bunch of sick fuks!!!!!remember though as your killing the "SHAUN OF THE DEAD" little demonic priks that bodies will accumulate and you can stack bodies in the corner and get an elevated position as to attack better!!!!! I dont know how many you I could kill but 5'10 195 doing mma and a Small amount of Filipino KunTao I guess my chances would be better since I would rely on technique instead of mostly strength,so I can conserve energy better....I must admit though its a sad thought to have to ponder the scenario :'(

---

HAHAHA BUT U POSTED A NEW SENARIO... COULD'T AVOID IT....LOL GOTCHA ;D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by jtrock

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

;D HAHA SO TRU......WAIT.....WAHTS THAT? ........ OH MY GOD. THEY FOUND ME.....AAAAAHHHHHHH THE CHILDREN.... THERES HUNDREDS.........**GET OFF ME.....***MY LEGS.... OWWW QUIT BITING YOU****BASTARDS....AHHHHHH HELP........!!!!!!!!!IUGFIEUGUIFGEQIFIAHCVBV EBFI

---

Man you are a bunch of sick fuks!!!!!remember though as your killing the "SHAUN OF THE DEAD" little demonic priks that bodies will accumulate and you can stack bodies in the corner and get an elevated position as to attack better!!!!! I dont know how many I could kill but 5'10 195 doing mma and a Small amount of Filipino KunTao I guess my chances would be better since I would rely on technique instead of mostly strength,so I can conserve energy better....I must admit though its a sad thought to have to ponder the scenario :'(

http://www.lazylaces.com/pics/center...f_the_dead.jpg

---

:coolclick: Great post, Condemning us on the one hand for our sick twisted minds, and indulge us by describing the sickest scenario yet ;D Pile the bodies high to give yourself height advantage. I like it.

If you could get high enough you could then start throwing some of the top kids down at the climbing hordes, I like ya style! ;D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bilbo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by jtrock

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by "PRIDE OF PROVIDENCE"

;D HAHA SO TRU......WAIT.....WAHTS THAT? ........ OH MY GOD. THEY FOUND ME.....AAAAAHHHHHHH THE CHILDREN.... THERES HUNDREDS.........**GET OFF ME.....***MY LEGS.... OWWW QUIT BITING YOU****BASTARDS....AHHHHHH HELP........!!!!!!!!!IUGFIEUGUIFGEQIFIAHCVBV EBFI

---

Man you are a bunch of sick fuks!!!!!remember though as your killing the "SHAUN OF THE DEAD" little demonic priks that bodies will accumulate and you can stack bodies in the corner and get an elevated position as to attack better!!!!! I dont know how many I could kill but 5'10 195 doing mma and a Small amount of Filipino KunTao I guess my chances would be better since I would rely on technique instead of mostly strength,so I can conserve energy better....I must admit though its a sad thought to have to ponder the scenario :'(

http://www.lazylaces.com/pics/center...f_the_dead.jpg

---

:coolclick: Great post, Condemning us on the one hand for our sick twisted minds, and indulge us by describing the sickest scenario yet ;D Pile the bodies high to give yourself height advantage. I like it.

If you could get high enough you could then start throwing some of the top kids down at the climbing hordes, I like ya style! ;D

---

Well you know I do my best to please :bat: