What makes a guy look "tough"

I was just thinking about this earlier today as i'm studying body language as part of this whole pickup thing, and I think body language is HUGE in how other people see you.

Now you know when you just see those guys who really look like the can handle themselves.. Not because of tattoo's or a big leather jacket or huge muscles. There is just something about him.
I've thought of a couple of things. He doesn't look too serious or too happy. He might have a little bit of a cool smile, but you know he's taking things serious.. Even if their is shit going on around, he looks and stays completely cool. Doesn't make sudden movements to look around at stuff that is going on. Stands or sits up straight.. Not in a stiff way, but just like, he's not trying to shrink as if making excuses for his own waste of space... But at the same time, he's kicked back and relaxed. Not like, beer belly couch pototo kicked back, but like, a MAN in his favourite chair at home, reading a newspaper.
A BIG one, he isn't afraid to hold eyecontact.. Not staring or eyeing you down, but when you catch site of him and you lock eyes, he still looks completely relaxed and unphased.. He doesn't look down or away unless as if something else has caught his attention.
I'll hand it over to you guys for anything you can think of to add.
I've got 2 examples of situations i've been in lately where I think body langauge has played a big part in how i've been perceived by other people, and I find it a very interesting subject. I'll post about those in a little while.

I've no idea of anything definite, but I've got my own opinions.

In boxing opponents always find it disconcerting when receiving the gloves instructions you stand pretty still and make eye contact. As you turn away look as if you let out a giggle and guys don't tend to rush in then.

I thnik you touched on some other areas there too...Just looking aware but never jovial.

That's good... Yeah the moments before a fight are great examples. Some fighters like Mosely etc aren't big on the staredown, but they look serious and ready for business.. Almost a little overly relaxed, but you can see he's not going to give you an inch.. Some fighters stay very still and look powerfully at their opponent.. Usually the other guy will try to mirror it as well to show he's not affraid. I remember before Floyd v Hatton, their were hundreds of comments on what their body language was saying at the various press conferences.. Boxers are definetly great examples of guys who have that look without really trying to do anything.

Another weird example I thought of it as well was horror movies where they have one killer like "when a stranger calls" or "the shining".. When they have shots of the killer standing still, they are usually in powerful stances and look quite serious, but with a sly small smirk... Even if they smile, they still have very serious eyes which tell you the mean business, but the smile shows that they also don't "care" about the situation to much.
Then the even bigger exhageration of the body langauge is when they have to "chase" their victim.. The victim is always franticly darting from door to door or down halls trying to get away, but the killer just walks powerfully. You very very rarely see them running or looking phased at all. The just move seriously, purposefully, and usually not very fast. The slower that the director can have them appear to be moving and still catching the victim, the more intimidating and scary the killer looks.. I always thought that was a cool aspect of how they get that killer to appear more threatening..

yEAH i DIG THAT, WHEN IN THE MIDST OF SOMETHING VIOLENT A GUY LOOKS TOTALLY AT EASE OR SLIGHTLY ENTERTAINED...tHTAS INTIMIDATING.

....the lack of an English accent ;D

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Originally Posted by Lyle

....the lack of an English accent ;D

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:rolleyes:

Dick heads I know feel they look tough by waring a Lowe Alpine hat, North Face Jacket, 6 Pack of Stella, Large Spliff and a Pitbull dog :D The dog usually looks better than them ;D.

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Originally Posted by leftylee

:rolleyes:

Dick heads I know feel they look tough by waring a Lowe Alpine hat, North Face Jacket, 6 Pack of Stella, Large Spliff and a Pitbull dog :D The dog usually looks better than them ;D.

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Those are their penis extension coz they're lacking down there.:)

calm dude like Madsen in reservoir Dogs. Where he is calm and fucking nuts.




Or an 80 pound man chasing me with a syringe.

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Originally Posted by boozeboxer

calm dude like Madsen in reservoir Dogs. Where he is calm and fucking nuts.




Or an 80 pound man chasing me with a syringe.

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Yea, the ear-cutting scene. It's pretty fuckin' intense...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJfOR...eature=related

"Hey, what's going on?... did ya hear that?"

Mike Madsen rules!

Spandex.

Tribal Tatoos, a bad attitude, and the emotional intelligence of a preschooler...basically anything you see on The Ultimate Fighter....those guys are tough

You can't ALWAYS go by looks. I've seem some guys who walk around and look pretty dangerous to mess with (not because of their size, because of their body language as has been described), but when in a fight, they got their ass kicked. And yet I've seen people that would look away almost instantly at eye contact, and looked really shy and nervous (sort of like Dolph Lungred in the Rocky movies), but could tear some ass up in a physical confrontation. (also like Dolph Lungred ;) )

A few things that make you look tough:

-Don't hunch over, stand up straight

-Don't stare down at the ground all the time, look up and straight ahead

-Not seeming to care or be worried about anything

Does anyone know Gaear Grimsrud? I like his role in "Fargo". Real quiet guy, but doesn't take shit from anyone.

Now he is a quiet psycho. But personally William H. Macy was much tougher in that movie. :D

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Originally Posted by boozeboxer

Now he is a quiet psycho. But personally William H. Macy was much tougher in that movie. :D

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Oops! you're right. I forgot this thread is all about "tough".

They all talk funny in that movie. I'm just glad I wasn't raised in ND, WI, or MN state.;D

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Originally Posted by Lyle

Tribal Tatoos, a bad attitude, and the emotional intelligence of a preschooler...basically anything you see on The Ultimate Fighter....those guys are tough

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Agreed. Prime Royce Gracie prolly the toughest. UFC didn't have weight classes back then and not much rules. And he kept winning against opponents way bigger than him.

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Originally Posted by Pacstraightleft

Agreed. Prime Royce Gracie prolly the toughest. UFC didn't have weight classes back then and not much rules. And he kept winning against opponents way bigger than him.

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....I was being sarcastic....the guys from The Ultimate Fighter are ridiculous

Confidence can sometimes scare the shit out of people,But It can also get you through some hairy situations.Staying calm,cool and collected while all around you are loosing there mind. You can not bluff confidence,You have to Isolate & squash your inner fears and carry yourself proud and genuinly believe.If you come off meek and weak...you will be just another pebble in the road.

It can be a catch 22.You can alienate people if you come off like a arrogant prick,but a true refined confidence can be a great defense.

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Originally Posted by Pacstraightleft

Agreed. Prime Royce Gracie prolly the toughest. UFC didn't have weight classes back then and not much rules. And he kept winning against opponents way bigger than him.

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I didn't mean to insult Royce....just the douches from The Ultimate Fighter.

Guys that are skilled in matrial arts and don't try to use it to bully people or try and cover up psychological and emotional problems have an aura of calmness and they don't aim to cause trouble only to end it and that is cool.

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Originally Posted by Lyle

....I was being sarcastic....the guys from The Ultimate Fighter are ridiculous

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I'm talking about one particular guy in UFC though, which is Royce Gracie. He is not a poser, and they didn't really sugarcoat his name unlike most of today's MMA fighters.

Gracie look like an average joe. He's not really big and muscular but he kick ass back in his era.

Make eye contact with everyone.

Greet everyone you pass but without a smile.

Always keep one hand in your coat pocket.

If someone says something funny, don't laugh or smile just say, "that's funny."

NEVER EVER ask for a receipt or stop to pick up change off the floor!

A Latin accent
A scar
A nickname
2 guys beside you

Mick does that include one of those tear tattoos?

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Originally Posted by boozeboxer

Mick does that include one of those tear tattoos?

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Booze you know the meaning behind that tat? :(

Isn't that when you kill someone? I don't know. I thought it was a hispanic thing? Because if it is. You would look tough to me.

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Originally Posted by boozeboxer

Isn't that when you kill someone? I don't know. I thought it was a hispanic thing? Because if it is. You would look tough to me.

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It's a jail/thug/gang thing.
You got it right it means you've killed someone.

How about Tex Cobb in Raising Arizona ?

Here all bopxers get virtually the same cut....
Zero back and sides and spiked on the top...
Virtually every guywho's into fighting legit or street has that cut over here.

True, working the doors in London,. This guy comes up to the head doorman one tuff looking bastard, there was something about the guy wiry good posture 6ft 2ins about 180lbs who asked to see the manager. They had given him the wrong change and he was very polite about it. The doorman said this is the manager, and with that hit him with his best right hand. The guy never moved and the doorman shit himself, the guy said theres no need to get violent. With that me standing 10ft away said come with me mate and took him to see the manager. Talking to him he was Polish on Holiday and was Polish Lightheavy Champion the whole thing made me smile at the time ;D

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Originally Posted by Scrap

True, working the doors in London,. This guy comes up to the head doorman one tuff looking bastard, there was something about the guy wiry good posture 6ft 2ins about 180lbs who asked to see the manager. They had given him the wrong change and he was very polite about it. The doorman said this is the manager, and with that hit him with his best right hand. The guy never moved and the doorman shit himself, the guy said theres no need to get violent. With that me standing 10ft away said come with me mate and took him to see the manager. Talking to him he was Polish on Holiday and was Polish Lightheavy Champion the whole thing made me smile at the time ;D

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Scrap you din't grab his name by any chance? It's just I've trained wityh a former Polish Light Heavy, it would be uncanny if it were the same fellow.

This happened in 78 before you were about Donny there was a ski in it somewhere ;D

Funny afterthought, that same night there was a band on who were amazing this was the punk era. We who worked there decided that it was a shame they were that good, but us experts all agreed they wouldnt make it. The Band Dire Straits ;D.

Pretty mad that!

Watch out 4 people who you know are keeping your knees and elbows in their perefial vision as they speak to you and they are always set so you have to move first to reach to them.
Cauliflower ears.
large leather hands.
A left eye that has no commpassion in it. ;)

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Originally Posted by Andre

Watch out 4 people who you know are keeping your knees and elbows in their perefial vision as they speak to you and they are always set so you have to move first to reach to them.
Cauliflower ears.
large leather hands.
A left eye that has no commpassion in it. ;)

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haha love the cauliflower ear comment..

those are all things that make someone look tough..

I don't look 'tough' cause i'm short, but if i had my shirt off you'd see i was in shape, or if you saw me run one of your teammates through the glass on a hockey rink then you'd think i was tough..


fine line between looking tough and actually being tough.. Andre outlined a tough looking dude though haha.

It's funny that I hear people saying don't break eye contact.

Where I come from if you look at anyone long enough they will start a fight with you on the basis that your challenging them. Like animals do.

I had a fight with a guy over a woman (yeah I know)

I was 18 he was about 30. He took off his jacket and his watch and it made me think, shit this guy is too relaxed, what does he know that I don't?

Third punch he was out for 5 minutes, I even helped him up. He was a high class business man trained to look dominating and powerful. But he was a wimp at the end of the day.

Body language can be fake in every case

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Originally Posted by Kel

It's funny that I hear people saying don't break eye contact.

Where I come from if you look at anyone long enough they will start a fight with you on the basis that your challenging them. Like animals do.

I had a fight with a guy over a woman (yeah I know)

I was 18 he was about 30. He took off his jacket and his watch and it made me think, shit this guy is too relaxed, what does he know that I don't?

Third punch he was out for 5 minutes, I even helped him up. He was a high class business man trained to look dominating and powerful. But he was a wimp at the end of the day.

Body language can be fake in every case

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This is awesome... That was exactly what I was getting at...
I think body language is 99% of it.. At least in how we pick it up and send the message to the brain that THIS is a guy we should be wary of if anything goes down...

Even a weak guy can get his body language perfect.. He can tilt his head back, cross his arms, stare comfortably, etc etc, and people could perceive him as a tough guy... But deep down it is completely faked...

But then you take a guy who looks like he's been in jail. He's got his shirt off, tattoo's all over him, scars on his head,,, a real rough looking dude, but he's sitting on the edge of the gutter with his head hung down, sobbing like his favourite dog died... Socially all his physical attributes i.e. tattoo's, tell us this guy is a tough f'ker... But with him in this positition, would you actually perceive the threat of his tattoo's or rough looks?
You probably wouldn't feel any threat at all, even though you know deep down this guy could probably rip your head off...

But then their is the weak business guy on the train who hasn't even stolen a chocolate bar, let alone been in a fight,,,, and because he has his body language down and doesn't break eye contact with you,,,, you perceive the threat from him...


On that level, it's just like we are animals, still walking around without communication or advanced logic brains, but we can spot the guys out instantly who's demeanor is threatening or challenging to our masculinity in the tribe...

I'd say anyone over the age of 21 who is trying to start a fight, probably looks tough..

and i say that because everyone wants to fight when they're 15+ at school and stuff.. and when they drink.. but if you are actually gonna throw down and you look mature then you must have some level of confidence that you can hold your own..

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Originally Posted by Clubber

You can't ALWAYS go by looks. I've seem some guys who walk around and look pretty dangerous to mess with (not because of their size, because of their body language as has been described), but when in a fight, they got their ass kicked. And yet I've seen people that would look away almost instantly at eye contact, and looked really shy and nervous (sort of like Dolph Lungred in the Rocky movies), but could tear some ass up in a physical confrontation. (also like Dolph Lungred ;) )

A few things that make you look tough:

-Don't hunch over, stand up straight

-Don't stare down at the ground all the time, look up and straight ahead

-Not seeming to care or be worried about anything

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Well there's a stark difference between looking and being. Actual tough guys might have the tendency to look unaffecting, preferring to avoid the fight considering he may well never know what the other guy is capable of. And looking 'weaker' might also make the other guy approach with his guard down and WHAM it's over in a second.

Im the kind of guy who doesnt want to fight and just try to be nice....which is really good coz when i get angry people usually get shit scared coz im so calm all the time. I havent had to fight anyone yet they usually just back down and apologise but in saying that i dont usually have many confrentations. Best way to be i reckon.