Does anyone else HATE this..
So, i know most people on here are older than me, and/or single or married and probably aren't in the same position as I am.. but i REALLY hate when my girlfriend goes out to a club with her friends..
I mean, i put up with it cause it's not worth getting into an argument over, and that's what some of her friends do, and i can't say she can't hang out with her friends, but MAN it drives me insane..
don't take this the wrong way, in no way am i a jealous guy, nor do i not trust her.. we've been together for 2 and a half years and are really close and stuff, but it's just the fact that she's in that environment where any drunk douche bag could hit on her and shit.. and i know that sounds stupid but when i go to the places she goes to with my buddies they're all going to meet girls, obviously.. so why am i to think that the things my friends do to girls, doesn't happen to her?
And i know you can say that a guy could hit on her at the supermarket, and that you really can't avoid it, but being in a place like this is asking for it..
I know there is nothing i can do about it, i sort of just wanna vent, but it would be nice to hear this bothers someone else ;D
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
I can understand you man.
I know exactly how you feel.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Well you can't very well tell her to not go out...#1 it would piss her off #2 she'd go out even more because women like to push buttons it's just their nature.
I strongly suggest anytime she plans on going out you should have like a poker night or go bowling or something. Do some guy thing and get your mind off it.
Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere......write that down
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Nor man it does my head in that my mr's wont go out..Im like here take my fucking money just leave me alone for an hour or something.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
I've had more than one relationship end over this in the past, RP.
I'm staunch in my "nothing good happens there" way of thinking. I question the morals of people who attend such gatherings and believe they suffer from poor self esteem. Male and female dregs alike, their jackassery nauseates me to the point of wailing frustration.
There are better ways to enjoy yourself than participating in mass gaucherie with an uncountable number of devient dimwits.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
It depends where she is going.
If she's going to a night club, then I would tell her not to go. But if she insist, then I'd ask her if I can go with her. And if she doesn't like that idea, then I would call it a problem coz there's gotta be something wrong there. And it aint about trust, jealousy, or insecurity.
Best thing you should do is to TALK with her about it.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BoxingGorilla
I've had more than one relationship end over this in the past, RP.
I'm staunch in my "nothing good happens there" way of thinking. I question the morals of people who attend such gatherings and believe they suffer from poor self esteem. Male and female dregs alike, their jackassery nauseates me to the point of wailing frustration.
There are better ways to enjoy yourself than participating in mass gaucherie with an uncountable number of devient dimwits.
Couldn't agree more BG.. It's just like, it's a place to be social, and not that i'm anti-social, i just feel that i'm in a relationship, so unless it's a special occasion like a friends birthday or something, i have no need to be there..
Also here is another perspective on it that i'm sure you will agree with.. It's totally a double standard but really its NOT cause it's logical.. I feel that when i go out with my friends, she has nothing to worry about, simply because generally speaking, guys approach girls at clubs/bars.. So if i'm not going to approach anyone, then what is there to worry about? But if your girlfriend goes, then you have to worry about guys approaching her simply because that is how nature works.. Now, again, i'm not worried that if a guy approaches her that she'll act in a non-acceptable way, it's just the fact that some dude is hitting on my girl, and that irks me, thas'all.. hear me?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Pacstraightleft
It depends where she is going.
If she's going to a night club, then I would tell her not to go. But if she insist, then I'd ask her if I can go with her. And if she doesn't like that idea, then I would call it a problem coz there's gotta be something wrong there. And it aint about trust, jealousy, or insecurity.
Best thing you should do is to TALK with her about it.
yeah, i mean, we've sort of talked about it, but again, i didn't feel there was a need to get into an argument over it, i just try to let it go cause she wants to hang w/ her friends.. Also, i feel that i wouldn't want to go with her, #1 because i'm letting her have her "alone" time with her friends and without me, and #2 i prefer bars.. sports bars and the like.. i don't like to dance or stand around and be a wallflower with a drink in my hand..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Lyle
Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere......write that down
A line of sheer brilliance Lyle hahah..
and in reference to the poker night thing.. the thing is that, for example, last night she went out with her friends.. but i have an exam this morning, and i had class last night, so there was no way i could really do anything to get my mind off of it haha..
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Everyone needs a break from everyone once in a while. As long as she comes home and isnt walking like John Wayne wheres the fuss?
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
When I was younger, and used to go to the clubs with my girlfriends, it was nothing more than to just have some fun with the girls. At the time I had a boyfriend, and like you, he didn't like to go dancing, and the thing is, woman just like to dance, and if their guys don't want to, then they go with the girls.
Most girls don't go there looking for hook-ups, although most guys do. We honestly, just want to hang out with each other, have some drinks, laugh, and dance.
Sure we get guys that would hit on us, but pretty much all we did was toy with them in order to get free drinks, and laugh with each other on how pathetic some guys are with their pick-ups lines. :LOLATYOU:
And being that she is with you, she is probably playing the protector role for her friends, that's what I was, so I'm sure she is handling herself well, and you have nothing to worry about.
Let her have her fun with her friends while she can, because the clubbing scene will get old after awhile. Remember, you only live once, so let her live it up while she can.
Also remember, this holds true for both men and women - It's okay to look at the menu, as long as you come home to eat. :splurt: :lickish:
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
I was going to give you some good advice, but the Bottles gone. The wife comes on here ;D
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
As long as she's not going out every weekend I don't see what the problem is.
Everybody has a right to a social life and if you trust your girl there's no reason to panic every time she goes out.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Bilbo
As long as she's not going out every weekend I don't see what the problem is.
Everybody has a right to a social life and if you trust your girl there's no reason to panic every time she goes out.
Can't they play Scrabble?
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Yea I dont see what the big deal is? I mean she is dancing and being out with her friends:confused:
Worst case scenario she is out gets hit on and bangs some dude.. I mean it all comes out in the wash and you decide if thats the kind of girl you want.. Like I said worse case scenario.
Let her be, if its not a trend and she comes home at a reasonable time and your bond is strong than your fine. But if your girl is over flirty and dresses scantily than again you decide if you want a girl who thrives on pushing the boundaries of your trust ;)
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BoxingGorilla
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Bilbo
As long as she's not going out every weekend I don't see what the problem is.
Everybody has a right to a social life and if you trust your girl there's no reason to panic every time she goes out.
Can't they play Scrabble?
scrabble involves spelling
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BoxingGorilla
I've had more than one relationship end over this in the past, RP.
I'm staunch in my "nothing good happens there" way of thinking. I question the morals of people who attend such gatherings and believe they suffer from poor self esteem. Male and female dregs alike, their jackassery nauseates me to the point of wailing frustration.
There are better ways to enjoy yourself than participating in mass gaucherie with an uncountable number of devient dimwits.
lol you are truly the only man less sociable than myself.
Me, you and CFH would make for the worst party hosts of all time :D
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Bilbo
As long as she's not going out every weekend I don't see what the problem is.
Everybody has a right to a social life and if you trust your girl there's no reason to panic every time she goes out.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
JT Rock
Yea I dont see what the big deal is? I mean she is dancing and being out with her friends:confused:
Worst case scenario she is out gets hit on and bangs some dude.. I mean it all comes out in the wash and you decide if thats the kind of girl you want.. Like I said worse case scenario.
Let her be, if its not a trend and she comes home at a reasonable time and your bond is strong than your fine. But if your girl is over flirty and dresses scantily than again you decide if you want a girl who thrives on pushing the boundaries of your trust ;)
so here is the trend.. or at least it seems.. the people on here who are around my age, understand.. and JT and Bilbo who are older, do not.. and that's fine.. but you guys aren't understanding completely what im saying..
i'm not panicking when she goes out.. i specifically said in my first post that i trust her, and am not worried about anything "happening", or her meeting someone else.. it's not that at all..
And i don't know what the siginificance is about going out every weekend Bilbo, but yes, she goes out at least once, normally twice a week.. Again, i don't know what that means, but considering you brought it up..
I hate having to repeat myself, but again, in my original post, i said that i don't want to stop her from hanging out with her friends, that's not what this is about.. i understand that people have to have social lives.. i didn't say she should be going out..
It's just a general uncomfortable feeling that i have when she goes to a place that if i were single, i'd be there looking for some chicks.. I mean, there are alternatives to going to clubs to hang out with your friends.. Considering they're all friends because they go to the same college, and they're all not from this state, they all have apartments to have parties at and stuff.. not saying that they should always stay in, but it just seems crazy to always go out.. plus, i know she can't afford it.. heck i couldn't afford it.
It's just a simple matter of feeling uncomfortable.. if you've been in the situation recently, then you know how i feel.. hence the people who literally said they know how i feel.. if you haven't been in the situation in decades, let alone ever, (not speaking to anyone personally here) then i don't expect you to see where i'm coming from.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
RP33
So, i know most people on here are older than me, and/or single or married and probably aren't in the same position as I am.. but i REALLY hate when my girlfriend goes out to a club with her friends..
I mean, i put up with it cause it's not worth getting into an argument over, and that's what some of her friends do, and i can't say she can't hang out with her friends, but MAN it drives me insane..
don't take this the wrong way, in no way am i a jealous guy, nor do i not trust her.. we've been together for 2 and a half years and are really close and stuff, but it's just the fact that she's in that environment where any drunk douche bag could hit on her and shit.. and i know that sounds stupid but when i go to the places she goes to with my buddies they're all going to meet girls, obviously.. so why am i to think that the things my friends do to girls, doesn't happen to her?
And i know you can say that a guy could hit on her at the supermarket, and that you really can't avoid it, but being in a place like this is asking for it..
I know there is nothing i can do about it, i sort of just wanna vent, but it would be nice to hear this bothers someone else ;D
best thing to do is if she goes up you go out too.
don't let a women know you worry about her, let her know you wear the pants in the relationship. She should be the one worrying about you cause you the man that calls all the shots. only thing to let a women know is if you love her. thats it, as long as you've done that part. you can ignore everything else but still can't go wrong in the eyes of a women that loves you back.
if she refuses a kind offer of going with her well then take it like a man. She'll have one night out so what, if she cheat or flirt around ooh well thats her. Still don't let her beat you inside, after she have her one night out. take the next 5 days out with your boys. Watch how much she'll beg you to spend time with her. Dont worry about a thang cause a girl that wants to cheat will eventually cheat. trust her for now but if she fxcks up, well thats your girl and your business but honestly I'd want no part of a girl that can't stay loyal to her man.
Us man we're curse with lust for newer flesh even though we love our ladies. Its unfair but the best of womens can accept it. The best of mans can fend desires off and the greatest of wifes can cure that curse from us dear husbands of theirs. No man can cure a women with different desires though cause thats no curse, shes just a mistress type so don't treat her like a wife. In other words don't fall for that girl, don't you dare love her. enjoy her but don't fxcking get attract. Its one of our most worst downfall as mens. Theres plenty of great gals out there waiting to be made a wife, so find one.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
RP33
So, i know most people on here are older than me, and/or single or married and probably aren't in the same position as I am.. but i REALLY hate when my girlfriend goes out to a club with her friends..
I mean, i put up with it cause it's not worth getting into an argument over, and that's what some of her friends do, and i can't say she can't hang out with her friends, but MAN it drives me insane..
don't take this the wrong way, in no way am i a jealous guy, nor do i not trust her.. we've been together for 2 and a half years and are really close and stuff, but it's just the fact that she's in that environment where any drunk douche bag could hit on her and shit.. and i know that sounds stupid but when i go to the places she goes to with my buddies they're all going to meet girls, obviously.. so why am i to think that the things my friends do to girls, doesn't happen to her?
And i know you can say that a guy could hit on her at the supermarket, and that you really can't avoid it, but being in a place like this is asking for it..
I know there is nothing i can do about it, i sort of just wanna vent, but it would be nice to hear this bothers someone else ;D
RP33, get out from under your girls skirt man... :mad:
Aren't you the one who posted pictures of the bachelor party you were at and also flat on the floor passed out?
I've been with my girl for several years now she goes out often with her friends sometimes if I can I come along for the ride. Her girlfriends love me cause from all their guys I'm the only one that can stand them on their night outs. (I'm not friends with their boyfriends) But they know I can come along and just watch them go crazy.
I was gonna type a long response but as honest as I can be with you DIANE has the best response and it's perfect. No one else on here has to reply anythign else. Shes perfectly right.
Girls just wanna Dance, Drink, Laugh and Feel Good. They like to get on the dance floor shake their asses, slap eachothers ass. Make stupid faces and make fun of other girls there and the guys there who are salivating over them.
More then anything RP33 you just gotta grow up man. Shes just having fun as others have said so as long as shes coming home to you and she doesn't walk in like she just got off a horse your good.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Lyle
Well you can't very well tell her to not go out...#1 it would piss her off #2 she'd go out even more because women like to push buttons it's just their nature.
I strongly suggest anytime she plans on going out you should have like a poker night or go bowling or something. Do some guy thing and get your mind off it.
Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere......write that down
Right on Lyle, RP33 take your ass somewhere and have some drinks yourself on your own. Does the term "Elbow room mean anything to you" ;D
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BoxingGorilla
I've had more than one relationship end over this in the past, RP.
I'm staunch in my "nothing good happens there" way of thinking. I question the morals of people who attend such gatherings and believe they suffer from poor self esteem. Male and female dregs alike, their jackassery nauseates me to the point of wailing frustration.
There are better ways to enjoy yourself than participating in mass gaucherie with an uncountable number of devient dimwits.
:lol:
You gotta love Silverback....
Making a sandwhich would also be too risky cause you know you gotta use a knife sometimes. :D
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Memphis
Everyone needs a break from everyone once in a while. As long as she comes home and isnt walking like John Wayne wheres the fuss?
:lolhaha: True. You also wanna check her breath.
And not for alcohol but for Cock Breath. ;D
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Diane
When I was younger, and used to go to the clubs with my girlfriends, it was nothing more than to just have some fun with the girls. At the time I had a boyfriend, and like you, he didn't like to go dancing, and the thing is, woman just like to dance, and if their guys don't want to, then they go with the girls.
Most girls don't go there looking for hook-ups, although most guys do. We honestly, just want to hang out with each other, have some drinks, laugh, and dance.
Sure we get guys that would hit on us, but pretty much all we did was toy with them in order to get free drinks, and laugh with each other on how pathetic some guys are with their pick-ups lines. :LOLATYOU:
And being that she is with you, she is probably playing the protector role for her friends, that's what I was, so I'm sure she is handling herself well, and you have nothing to worry about.
Let her have her fun with her friends while she can, because the clubbing scene will get old after awhile. Remember, you only live once, so let her live it up while she can.
Also remember, this holds true for both men and women - It's okay to look at the menu, as long as you come home to eat. :splurt: :lickish:
Diane,
I wish I could Rape I mean Rep. you again...
This is perfect. I've been with my girl for a while and I can't tell you how many times she's called me to go pick her up cause she can't drive back.
2, 3 in the morning there I go to pick her and her drunk friends up but wait guess what? They wanna eat their hungry so there I go car full of drunk girls who are hungry driving them around. I know my girl and I trust shes smart enough to know when shes had enough.
Diane, would you also not agree that the more RP insists on not letting her go the more she'll do it?
I know with me I just went along for the ride with my girl and I had soo many laughs from seeing them fall, cry, puke :puke: allover the side walks.
My girls past it it's a just a little faze that girsl go through you just gotta let her be and she'll get over it. Let her get it ouf her system.
Great advice Diane.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Scrap
I was going to give you some good advice, but the Bottles gone. The wife comes on here ;D
In true fashion Scrap.
Take it it's time to talk about some things with her? :D
Quote:
Originally Posted by
JT Rock
Yea I dont see what the big deal is? I mean she is dancing and being out with her friends:confused:
Worst case scenario she is out gets hit on and bangs some dude.. I mean it all comes out in the wash and you decide if thats the kind of girl you want.. Like I said worse case scenario.
Let her be, if its not a trend and she comes home at a reasonable time and your bond is strong than your fine. But if your girl is over flirty and dresses scantily than again you decide if you want a girl who thrives on pushing the boundaries of your trust ;)
Spot on JT....
RP33, keep in mind this is coming from an engaged man. ;) (JT not me)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Bilbo
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BoxingGorilla
I've had more than one relationship end over this in the past, RP.
I'm staunch in my "nothing good happens there" way of thinking. I question the morals of people who attend such gatherings and believe they suffer from poor self esteem. Male and female dregs alike, their jackassery nauseates me to the point of wailing frustration.
There are better ways to enjoy yourself than participating in mass gaucherie with an uncountable number of devient dimwits.
lol you are truly the only man less sociable than myself.
Me, you and CFH would make for the worst party hosts of all time :D
No music, non-alcoholic beverages, and everyone just sitting staring at eachother.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Thanks for agreeing with me Mick, luckily I was able to rape rep you! :lickish:
I also completely agree with everything you had to say. :highfive:
And yes, if he pushes his concerns too much, she will just want to do it more, I know that I did. And he could be pushing her right out the door, by trying to be so controlling over what she does. Woman don't like to be controlled anymore than guys do.
And Mick, I went through exactly what you went through, the guy friends of my boyfriend back then, always wanted me to come out with them, because they said that I was like one of the guys, and like you, I didn't really get along with their girls. I used to have so much fun just watching those drunken idiots.
RP33, just let her have some fun, it will get old to her eventually. I'm sure that she could care less about the guys that may hit on her, so you should take her lead, and not care about it either, because you'll drive yourself crazy over something that is meaningless.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
haha.. thanks for the reply Mick.. rep distributed..
i think it's just a tough situation because of our ages.. me, (22) her (21)
if we were a bit older things would be a bit more mellow i think.. so i gotta just ride it out.. so basically your "grow up" comment is spot on.. even though it sounds a bit condescending, i don't take it in that way.
she graduates from college next month, and im done at the end of the year, so things will be changing quite a bit.. so her little routine of always going out is really in lieu of her graduating and her friends leaving and what not..
thanks for the rep/support fags.
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Diane
Thanks for agreeing with me Mick, luckily I was able to rape rep you! :lickish:
I also completely agree with everything you had to say. :highfive:
And yes, if he pushes his concerns too much, she will just want to do it more, I know that I did. And he could be pushing her right out the door, by trying to be so controlling over what she does. Woman don't like to be controlled anymore than guys do.
And Mick, I went through exactly what you went through, the guy friends of my boyfriend back then, always wanted me to come out with them, because they said that I was like one of the guys, and like you, I didn't really get along with their girls. I used to have so much fun just watching those drunken idiots.
RP33, just let her have some fun, it will get old to her eventually. I'm sure that she could care less about the guys that may hit on her, so you should take her lead, and not care about it either, because you'll drive yourself crazy over something that is meaningless.
I just want to clear the air of something..
I am not controlling, nor do we ever argue about this situation.. as i said, this whole situation just bothers me, and i came here to see if anyone felt the same, and to vent a bit.. i vented on the website because i wasn't going to vent and argue with my girlfriend..
so just to clear the air, i have never said to her, ever, that she shouldn't go out or anything like that.. so i'm not worried about her doing it more, or us fighting over it..
Re: Does anyone else HATE this..
So you could go drinking or bowling or do poker but hey what's wrong with relaxing and watching a movie or just enjoying the peace and quiet and comfort of not having some woman around asking you all types of stupid fucking questions and bugging the crap out of you.
So just find things to enjoy about her going out and having fun and hell if she has enough to drink she might come home feelin a little frisky ;)
