I Am A Man!!!

I thought it was when I hit puberty, but I was mistaken. I thought it was when I lost my virginity, but I was way off. I thought it was when I turned 18, then 21. Wrong on both accounts.

Last Thursday I changed my first tire. All by myself and it was easy. It was a true chest-thumping moment. My blood turned into flame and boiled in my veins as cars roared past. I growled and shook my upraised fist at the gods, I murdered a wolf and her innocent little pups, gnashing their furry meat betwixt my teeth. And as I revved the engine and raced away, smearing wolf's blood onto my dirtied shirt I knew it wasn't the tire that had been changed. It was me.

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Originally Posted by Killface

I thought it was when I hit puberty, but I was mistaken. I thought it was when I lost my virginity, but I was way off. I thought it was when I turned 18, then 21. Wrong on both accounts.

Last Thursday I changed my first tire. All by myself and it was easy. It was a true chest-thumping moment. My blood turned into flame and boiled in my veins as cars roared past. I growled and shook my upraised fist at the gods, I murdered a wolf and her innocent little pups, gnashing their furry meat betwixt my teeth. And as I revved the engine and raced away, smearing wolf's blood onto my dirtied shirt I knew it wasn't the tire that had been changed. It was me.

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Have you forgot to take your medication again??How many times do i have to tell you."If i have'nt told you once,I've told you a thousand times!":rolleyes:


;D

Congrat....... ahhhhh, forget it. :mad:

But way to go, Killface. I've changed a couple of air filters and air conditioning filters before, but not a tire. :)

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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:lol:


What's the use of knowing how to actually change a tire when you can't even pick one up:LOLATYOU: ;D

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Originally Posted by LEGION

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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:lol:


What's the use of knowing how to actually change a tire when you can't even pick one up:LOLATYOU: ;D

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lol I have it all worked out Legion. If I break down with a girl I'll 'teach' her how to change it and she can do the lifting and hard work. I'll tell her it's character building and an important lifeskill for any modern girl to master. I'll know what to do and can tell her.

If I'm not with a girl I have no face to save and so would just call the RAC :cool:

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by LEGION

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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:lol:


What's the use of knowing how to actually change a tire when you can't even pick one up:LOLATYOU: ;D

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lol I have it all worked out Legion. If I break down with a girl I'll 'teach' her how to change it and she can do the lifting and hard work. I'll tell her it's character building and an important lifeskill for any modern girl to master. I'll know what to do and can tell her.

If I'm not with a girl I have no face to save and so would just call the RAC :cool:

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I can't believe a girl put a brick through your car window with a note LOL. That story still cracks me up to this day.

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Originally Posted by leftylee

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by LEGION

:lol:


What's the use of knowing how to actually change a tire when you can't even pick one up:LOLATYOU: ;D

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lol I have it all worked out Legion. If I break down with a girl I'll 'teach' her how to change it and she can do the lifting and hard work. I'll tell her it's character building and an important lifeskill for any modern girl to master. I'll know what to do and can tell her.

If I'm not with a girl I have no face to save and so would just call the RAC :cool:

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I can't believe a girl put a brick through your car window with a note LOL. That story still cracks me up to this day.

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LOL; I never heard that one. What happened?

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Originally Posted by LEGION

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Originally Posted by leftylee

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

lol I have it all worked out Legion. If I break down with a girl I'll 'teach' her how to change it and she can do the lifting and hard work. I'll tell her it's character building and an important lifeskill for any modern girl to master. I'll know what to do and can tell her.

If I'm not with a girl I have no face to save and so would just call the RAC :cool:

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I can't believe a girl put a brick through your car window with a note LOL. That story still cracks me up to this day.

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LOL; I never heard that one. What happened?

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It's pretty funny. I'll PM you ;D

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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Ya know, that's always been one of my worst fears. Break down and can't fix the car myself like a man, and she thinks less of me from then on out. :-\

Sorry to hear that, Master Baggins. :(

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Originally Posted by Clubber

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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Ya know, that's always been one of my worst fears. Break down and can't fix the car myself like a man, and she thinks less of me from then on out. :-\

Sorry to hear that, Master Baggins. :(

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Well considering that a girl in your car will probably be gagged and taped up in the trunk of your car I can imagine it being a fear. You'd have to lift her out to get to the spare.

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Originally Posted by leftylee

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by LEGION

:lol:


What's the use of knowing how to actually change a tire when you can't even pick one up:LOLATYOU: ;D

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lol I have it all worked out Legion. If I break down with a girl I'll 'teach' her how to change it and she can do the lifting and hard work. I'll tell her it's character building and an important lifeskill for any modern girl to master. I'll know what to do and can tell her.

If I'm not with a girl I have no face to save and so would just call the RAC :cool:

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I can't believe a girl put a brick through your car window with a note LOL. That story still cracks me up to this day.

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What can I say, I'm as popular offline as on :rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by LEGION

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Originally Posted by Clubber

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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Ya know, that's always been one of my worst fears. Break down and can't fix the car myself like a man, and she thinks less of me from then on out. :-\

Sorry to hear that, Master Baggins. :(

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Well considering that a girl in your car will probably be gagged and taped up in the trunk of your car I can imagine it being a fear. You'd have to lift her out to get to the spare.

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Cuffed and blindfolded. :cool::cool:;D

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Originally Posted by leftylee

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Originally Posted by LEGION

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Originally Posted by leftylee

I can't believe a girl put a brick through your car window with a note LOL. That story still cracks me up to this day.

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LOL; I never heard that one. What happened?

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It's pretty funny. I'll PM you ;D

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Feel free to send me that PM too. I wanna hear this ;D

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Originally Posted by Clubber

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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Ya know, that's always been one of my worst fears. Break down and can't fix the car myself like a man, and she thinks less of me from then on out. :-\

Sorry to hear that, Master Baggins. :(

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Don't worry Clubber, as long as you still have the fistfull of sweaty bills she'll pay attention to you.

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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That must be very embarrassing.


My wife knows I don't do dirty works so I'm fine with not being able to do it.

If you have money, we call it in business as LEVERAGE. Why work when you can hire somebody to work for you?:cool:

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Originally Posted by brucelee

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

I'm 34 and can't even change my oil let alone a tyre :-X

I once took a girl out and we got a flat. I had to call a mate to come and change the tyre for me. He drove 15 miles to come and rescue us.

I felt silly, and a few months later after we split up she started dating him.

This was around 10 years ago and I still havn't gotten around to learn how to change a tyre so that it doesn't happen again :-\

I will put it on my list of goals when I begin my October challenge with Dizaster as like you Killface I think being able to a basic manly job will give me more self confidence and be some kind of rite of passage.

Better to make that rite 15 years late then not at all I guess.........

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That must be very embarrassing.


My wife knows I don't do dirty works so I'm fine with not being able to do it.

If you have money, we call it in business as LEVERAGE. Why work when you can hire somebody to work for you?:cool:

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I can change a tyre along with brake pads, thats my knowledge of cars

My girlfriend had been nagging me for ages to book her car in to get the brakes fixed on her car because they'd been making a whining sound for a little while. The task became a bit more urgent though when I pressed the brakes one day and it sounded like 2 tractors wrestling, so I was forced to get the fixed. Unfortunately it was on a Saturday morning so no Garage's open to repair them and we needed to use the car over the weekend. Never mind the fact that I had no money to pay for them to get fixed.
The only solution left was for me to fix the brakes myself which I had absolutely no idea how to do, and no instructions/service manual.. I tracked down a purchased the correct brake pads for that model car, something I was proud of on it's own...

Then I got home, got my dad's tool box out, and went to work changing the brake pads.. It was great! I got completely filthy all over my hands and up my arms. Even got black on my face... After I had done one side, I was so proud I made a "how to change front brakes" video with my mobile phone on the other side... I'm like "now you'll want to get a blah blah inch spanner and turn it this way on this bolt.... If the bolt gets stuck, wrap the rag around the spanner and hit it with a bit of metal or something to hit the bolt loose" etc. I made myself sound like a pro... I've been meaning to edit he video down to 6 or 7 minutes and post on Youtube but forgot about it totally until just then...

haha congrats all of you for becoming men, especially to Diz that is mighty impressive!

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Originally Posted by Dizaster

My girlfriend had been nagging me for ages to book her car in to get the brakes fixed on her car because they'd been making a whining sound for a little while. The task became a bit more urgent though when I pressed the brakes one day and it sounded like 2 tractors wrestling, so I was forced to get the fixed. Unfortunately it was on a Saturday morning so no Garage's open to repair them and we needed to use the car over the weekend. Never mind the fact that I had no money to pay for them to get fixed.
The only solution left was for me to fix the brakes myself which I had absolutely no idea how to do, and no instructions/service manual.. I tracked down a purchased the correct brake pads for that model car, something I was proud of on it's own...

Then I got home, got my dad's tool box out, and went to work changing the brake pads.. It was great! I got completely filthy all over my hands and up my arms. Even got black on my face... After I had done one side, I was so proud I made a "how to change front brakes" video with my mobile phone on the other side... I'm like "now you'll want to get a blah blah inch spanner and turn it this way on this bolt.... If the bolt gets stuck, wrap the rag around the spanner and hit it with a bit of metal or something to hit the bolt loose" etc. I made myself sound like a pro... I've been meaning to edit he video down to 6 or 7 minutes and post on Youtube but forgot about it totally until just then...

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Ah Diz nice to see you are taking your self improvement program seriously!

Come October I'll join you in your quest to be a better man. I'm not so interested in spending every day in a shopping mall approaching girls but I do have a whole bunch of things I want to work on and achieve and I'll use your deadline as my own.

With my lanline deal I now get free lanline calls to Australia as well so we can even arrange progress reports over the phone.

I've stagnated in the past few years and want to start learning, achieving and experiencing life again.

Changing the break pads on your car may sound trivial but's it all about assuming responsibility and being in control of your life and I salute you for it :)

Bilbo, I have to take you seriously. Must be a strength thing eh?
There is a trick to it. Hand brake and in gear only raise one sode of the car at a time never the whole back end if on a slope.
you will need a cross wheel brace + so that you can place one of the socket sections over the wheel nut ,then you hold one side of the cross and stand on the other with one foot to lossen each wheel nut without stress to your self just use your body weight and jump up and dodwn slighty,(they undo anticlockwise.) lossen all the wheel nuts off the same way without removing them completly then place the jack under the car in the right position; see manual or put it under the plate at the bottom of the spring, in behind the wheel youre about to change, or on the bumper bar where its attached to the body for those types of jacks, raise it off the floor to the height of a pumped up tyre (thats about 2 inches more than the flat one thats comming off).Remove it completly and put the new one on as you take the other off so your not up on the jack for any longet than required. Do up nuts with arm strength then let the jack down and do them up again using body weight again,do up the nuts opposite each other in order from one side to the other not around in a circle.
Check them after a few miles. ;) now you know, all you got to do is do.

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Originally Posted by Andre

Bilbo, I have to take you seriously. Must be a strength thing eh?
There is a trick to it. Hand brake and in gear only raise one sode of the car at a time never the whole back end if on a slope.
you will need a cross wheel brace + so that you can place one of the socket sections over the wheel nut ,then you hold one side of the cross and stand on the other with one foot to lossen each wheel nut without stress to your self just use your body weight and jump up and dodwn slighty,(they undo anticlockwise.) lossen all the wheel nuts off the same way without removing them completly then place the jack under the car in the right position; see manual or put it under the plate at the bottom of the spring, in behind the wheel youre about to change, or on the bumper bar where its attached to the body for those types of jacks, raise it off the floor to the height of a pumped up tyre (thats about 2 inches more than the flat one thats comming off).Remove it completly and put the new one on as you take the other off so your not up on the jack for any longet than required. Do up nuts with arm strength then let the jack down and do them up again using body weight again,do up the nuts opposite each other in order from one side to the other not around in a circle.
Check them after a few miles. ;) now you know, all you got to do is do.

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Cheers Andre, that is probably the most comprehensible post you've ever made on here, and I still didn't understand a word :D

I think this time it's more to do with me being absolutely useless with cars rather than any strange quasi talk on your behalf.

I will set it as one of my goals to achieve by the end of the year!

You fucking wimps. I have changed thousands of tires. Some of them are really hard on big tractors. The worst is when they are put on with a gorilla air gun......but you don't have one to get the damn thing loose.

Why don't you whip it out, already? This was a share thing, not a 'mine is bigger than yours' party. Poohead.

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Originally Posted by boozeboxer

You fucking wimps. I have changed thousands of tires. Some of them are really hard on big tractors. The worst is when they are put on with a gorilla air gun......but you don't have one to get the damn thing loose.

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I'll bet it's hard on a commercial vehicle.

I learned how to change a tire at the age of 13.

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Originally Posted by CutMeMick

I learned how to change a tire at the age of 13.

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In Mexico? I thought wagons had wheels made of wood?

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by CutMeMick

I learned how to change a tire at the age of 13.

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In Mexico? I thought wagons had wheels made of wood?

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And pulled by horse ;D

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by CutMeMick

I learned how to change a tire at the age of 13.

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In Mexico? I thought wagons had wheels made of wood?

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I grew up on the upper class of Mexico so we could afford bicycles. :p

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Originally Posted by CutMeMick

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by CutMeMick

I learned how to change a tire at the age of 13.

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In Mexico? I thought wagons had wheels made of wood?

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I grew up on the upper class of Mexico so we could afford bicycles. :p

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Ever fixed a puncture then