confidence.

I been fighting for a while, mostly street fights, not really cuz I'm a tough guy or anything like that, Its just common and hard to avoid. And at around 14 I started boxing in the street... My problem is... That Though I have alot more fights I've won, than lost... The losses (non boxing) stand out in my mind, and they hold me back alot from believing I can win. Its mostly cuz of one or two fights in particular, that I should and could have won, but didn't, and it had alot of pride riding on it.. & I guess, I never forgave myself for'em...

Its just now its hard to in vision myself winning... like I don't even Trust telling myself I can, cuz I feel like I'm fooling myself. Now I want to get in a boxing gym and do the real thing, But I'm not sure of myself. I know the heart is there cuz the last thing I am is a quitter. But mentally, I'm not.

Anyone relate, or have any advice?

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Originally Posted by onefiftyone

I been fighting for a while, mostly street fights, not really cuz I'm a tough guy or anything like that, Its just common and hard to avoid. And at around 14 I started boxing in the street... My problem is... That Though I have alot more fights I've won, than lost... The losses (non boxing) stand out in my mind, and they hold me back alot from believing I can win. Its mostly cuz of one or two fights in particular, that I should and could have won, but didn't, and it had alot of pride riding on it.. & I guess, I never forgave myself for'em...

Its just now its hard to in vision myself winning... like I don't even Trust telling myself I can, cuz I feel like I'm fooling myself. Now I want to get in a boxing gym and do the real thing, But I'm not sure of myself. I know the heart is there cuz the last thing I am is a quitter. But mentally, I'm not.

Anyone relate, or have any advice?

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You just about lost me, and likely other readers at the highlighted part.

But I did read on. If confidence is something you lack, the boxing gym is the place you'll find it. And it won't be because of your new found awesome ability to kick ass on the streets, it will be because if you stick with it, you will acquire one of boxings greatest gifts. Self-respect, through hard work and determination.

So the short answer? Get your ass to the gym.

hopefully, through the gym you will find more reason not to fight in the streets...

Good luck!

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Originally Posted by onefiftyone

any advice?

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Honestly? Advice: Grow up.

Maybe if you get yourself in a real gym and listen to the coach you may do two things:

a) get good at boxing
b) mature into a young man

Forget about your kiddie scraps and go to the gym. How else will you know what you can do if you don't try.

I have to agree with everyone here.

Go to the gym PERIOD ---> . end of story

Hi onefiftyone,
I concur with what's been said...

You should only use a physical response on the street as a last resort for righteous self-protective purposes.

Okay, in regards to improving your confidence, here's how to do it in a nutshell; join a reputable gym and live/breath the 5 D's--Desire, Determination, Discipline, Dedication and Diligence. I guarantee that you're confidence will positively evolve if you keep your ego and perspective in check as you apply these qualities to your training.

Anyway, take care and good "luck" ("luck" meaning when preparation meets opportunity).

Best Regards,
Lito

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Originally Posted by AdamGB

Quote:

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Originally Posted by onefiftyone

any advice?

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Honestly? Advice: Grow up.

Maybe if you get yourself in a real gym and listen to the coach you may do two things:

a) get good at boxing
b) mature into a young man

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Spot on, takes a bigger man to walk away, after a while actually boxing you will have enough confidence in knowing you could on the streets to actually not.

On the street there are no rules, it usually ends in tears when some fool pulls a knife.Get your shit together buddy.

Yeah, I figured y'all would crucify me for street fighting

but you gotta understand where I'm at, theres people starting shit for dumb ass reasons... And Its easy to say the bigger man can walk away, but its not always that simple.

Like the fight I lost, I got into cuz A Dude called my house talking about raping my sister.

which Is why I took the loss so hard, cuz more than just my pride was on the line.

I'm not a Punk running around starting shit on the streets to prove himself. But I know Way too many dudes like that to feel comfortable walking away all the time... And I haven't been in a street fight since last year.

But I will Be in the Gym... Count on it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by onefiftyone

I been fighting for a while, mostly street fights, not really cuz I'm a tough guy or anything like that, Its just common and hard to avoid. And at around 14 I started boxing in the street... My problem is... That Though I have alot more fights I've won, than lost... The losses (non boxing) stand out in my mind, and they hold me back alot from believing I can win. Its mostly cuz of one or two fights in particular, that I should and could have won, but didn't, and it had alot of pride riding on it.. & I guess, I never forgave myself for'em...

Its just now its hard to in vision myself winning... like I don't even Trust telling myself I can, cuz I feel like I'm fooling myself. Now I want to get in a boxing gym and do the real thing, But I'm not sure of myself. I know the heart is there cuz the last thing I am is a quitter. But mentally, I'm not.

Anyone relate, or have any advice?

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You cannot compare the two...street fighting and fighting in the ring are obviously different!

But I cannot understand how you can have confidence on the street and not to go to a Gymn...I know loads of lads who I trained with who are the other way around...Just go!

It'll be an entirely new experience for you. If you've gotten into a lot of fights before, you'll have to work hard with your trainer to reprogram any habits that you've picked along the way. It should be a good experience for you, the anxiety comes with the excitement. Have fun and stick with it.

I was hitting the heavy bag in this non boxing gym and some older dude who said he was a boxer was impressed, & said my jab is real nice.

He told me to get in this one boxing gym in my area cuz I have alot of talent, and not alot of dudes my age are gonna be kicking my ass lol...

& Its not that I have confidence in street fights but not in boxing.. its that I have confidence in neither, But I'll busttt that ass if you make me lol.

& What I'm looking to do, Is get rid of this inferiority complex I have, & I'm wondering if boxing is what I need to do.

No point kicking yourself when you haven't tried. Just go for it, you have my blessing. ;)

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Originally Posted by onefiftyone

I was hitting the heavy bag in this non boxing gym and some older dude who said he was a boxer was impressed, & said my jab is real nice.

He told me to get in this one boxing gym in my area cuz I have alot of talent, and not alot of dudes my age are gonna be kicking my ass lol...

& Its not that I have confidence in street fights but not in boxing.. its that I have confidence in neither, But I'll busttt that ass if you make me lol.

& What I'm looking to do, Is get rid of this inferiority complex I have, & I'm wondering if boxing is what I need to do.

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Mate you are not inferior to anyone bt there are limits physically these you get over by spirit and mentally .
I can look after myself and get evil if the chips are down; But there are people out here I know that I will not fight under any circumstances they can have the wallet or the glory of the moment if it comes to words; its worth it. Still is the master of unrest in these circumstances.
Then there are people out here that the people I wouldnt fight wont fight because they know it will never end until one of them is dead so they avoid them,see the dumb assed pattern.
You know something, when Yeshua was being stabbed in the side as he hung on the cross he turned and looked into one of the guards eyes and said he loved the guy with all his heart and forgave him with all his heart. That man dropped his weapons and walked away from the Roman army and allit stood for ,his spirit changed for all eternity and thats the biggest win.

A short story about confidence and street fighting. Ive been training for close to 2 years now. I stopped at a gas mart and some drunken ass that had been banned from the store asked me if i'd buy him some beer, I said no and went in the store.

When I came out I was walking away and he started yelling I was weak. I stopped and turned to look at him. dark circles under his eyes,sunken chest and a pot belly weighed about 150 wet, Im 210 in shape.

I smiled and said you need to get some help bro and walked away.

The point, I'd have wasted his drunk ass in a blaze of punches, but see, I knew it and didnt have to prove it in a street fight.

get in the gym, learn the skills and confidence will come, good luck my friend.

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Originally Posted by BMN

A short story about confidence and street fighting. Ive been training for close to 2 years now. I stopped at a gas mart and some drunken ass that had been banned from the store asked me if i'd buy him some beer, I said no and went in the store.

When I came out I was walking away and he started yelling I was weak. I stopped and turned to look at him. dark circles under his eyes,sunken chest and a pot belly weighed about 150 wet, Im 210 in shape.

I smiled and said you need to get some help bro and walked away.

The point, I'd have wasted his drunk ass in a blaze of punches, but see, I knew it and didnt have to prove it in a street fight.

get in the gym, learn the skills and confidence will come, good luck my friend.

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Good post, Sifu Cheung once said when the fear of uncertainty is removed action is no longer required.

Exactly, when you have confidence in yourself it's a lot easier to walk away from meaningless fights.

I've got nothing to prove to myself or anybody else outside of the ring.

There is a calm, peaceful feeling in walking away from a street fight. In the last year I imagine I have walked away from atleast 6 that could easily have turned into something messy. Usually at a party from some drunk asshole, who wants to try the boxer. "Boxing ain't shit man! I'll go you! " I am fairly sure in each instance I have done us both a favor.

I know for sure regardless of the outcome, who the better person was. And have confidence to thank for it. Confidence found through many, many hours at the gym, and many more plying my sport in the squared circle.

You'll just have to trust us on this. It is what it is.

I second these stories. Let me give my own personal experiences:

I was 14 and had practiced fighting on my own, was in good shape, but never boxed at a gym. I was "confident" or more like immaturely arrogent and always gave some smart answer. One time I got myself in trouble. I did it to 16 year old guy who happened to be short. He, being teased about this all the time, got bitter about it and well it got ugly. It ended up the police had to step in and that's when we found out he was a criminal whom the police had been looking for for quite some time. We never actually fought but that was enough for me to learn my lesson: don't get involved, don't walk around belittling others while showing off, and last but not least; grow up!

One year later, I join a boxing gym, am doing well and don't care at all what people think about me. If someone belittles me, I just laugh: I don't care. I know myself, I know what I'm capable of, I just don't care what anyone thinks of me. In short, join a good boxing gym. It's worth it