Need some help with gambling

Hey dudes. I have a female friend at work and we talk quite a bit. She had a terrible go of it being abused as a young girl and bounced around foster care. She is misguided but has a great heart. Thing is she has a serious gambling issue. She will put here rent money on a game and she is struggling as it is. She has her own kids but is also raising 3 foster children. I've given heard food and gas money etc when she was struggling but when I've spoken to her about her out of control gambling she gets quiet. Yes I e worked with addicts in my career but never compulsive gamblers. I know a lot of the behaviors etc are similar with drugs and gambeling but I wanted to see if you guys have any experience dealing with a friend who was heading to the bottom gambling l. If I come at her strong i will probably turn her against me. You guys ever deal with something like that

Like any addict they have to admit they have a problem before you can move anywhere with them.

They have to take the steps to help themselves and all you can do is support them.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Hey dudes. I have a female friend at work and we talk quite a bit. She had a terrible go of it being abused as a young girl and bounced around foster care. She is misguided but has a great heart. Thing is she has a serious gambling issue. She will put here rent money on a game and she is struggling as it is. She has her own kids but is also raising 3 foster children. I've given heard food and gas money etc when she was struggling but when I've spoken to her about her out of control gambling she gets quiet. Yes I e worked with addicts in my career but never compulsive gamblers. I know a lot of the behaviors etc are similar with drugs and gambeling but I wanted to see if you guys have any experience dealing with a friend who was heading to the bottom gambling l. If I come at her strong i will probably turn her against me. You guys ever deal with something like that

---

I don't really consider myself a gambler, I have the odd bet on the football or the boxing every now and again and even then it is only a maximum of £10/£15.
I do like the roulette but again the most I have ever put on in one session has been £30 and usually it is £10/£15

I do know someone who had a gambling problem, he is quite open about it, he racked up 36K of debt, I asked him what he was spending it on and he said it was the horses and fruit machines, he had numerous credit cards which all kept on racking up the debts because of it, he said that he got further and further in because he was trying to gamble his way out of the problem which just never works, once he realized that he just stopped.

I know that doesn't help you out with your question but at least it shows that some people can just wake up one day and see that there is a problem and then stop.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Batman

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Hey dudes. I have a female friend at work and we talk quite a bit. She had a terrible go of it being abused as a young girl and bounced around foster care. She is misguided but has a great heart. Thing is she has a serious gambling issue. She will put here rent money on a game and she is struggling as it is. She has her own kids but is also raising 3 foster children. I've given heard food and gas money etc when she was struggling but when I've spoken to her about her out of control gambling she gets quiet. Yes I e worked with addicts in my career but never compulsive gamblers. I know a lot of the behaviors etc are similar with drugs and gambeling but I wanted to see if you guys have any experience dealing with a friend who was heading to the bottom gambling l. If I come at her strong i will probably turn her against me. You guys ever deal with something like that

---

I don't really consider myself a gambler, I have the odd bet on the football or the boxing every now and again and even then it is only a maximum of £10/£15.
I do like the roulette but again the most I have ever put on in one session has been £30 and usually it is £10/£15

I do know someone who had a gambling problem, he is quite open about it, he racked up 36K of debt, I asked him what he was spending it on and he said it was the horses and fruit machines, he had numerous credit cards which all kept on racking up the debts because of it, he said that he got further and further in because he was trying to gamble his way out of the problem which just never works, once he realized that he just stopped.

I know that doesn't help you out with your question but at least it shows that some people can just wake up one day and see that there is a problem and then stop.

---

Ahh fuck it, just roll the dice BWAHAHAHA

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by brocktonblockbust

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Batman

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Hey dudes. I have a female friend at work and we talk quite a bit. She had a terrible go of it being abused as a young girl and bounced around foster care. She is misguided but has a great heart. Thing is she has a serious gambling issue. She will put here rent money on a game and she is struggling as it is. She has her own kids but is also raising 3 foster children. I've given heard food and gas money etc when she was struggling but when I've spoken to her about her out of control gambling she gets quiet. Yes I e worked with addicts in my career but never compulsive gamblers. I know a lot of the behaviors etc are similar with drugs and gambeling but I wanted to see if you guys have any experience dealing with a friend who was heading to the bottom gambling l. If I come at her strong i will probably turn her against me. You guys ever deal with something like that

---

I don't really consider myself a gambler, I have the odd bet on the football or the boxing every now and again and even then it is only a maximum of £10/£15.
I do like the roulette but again the most I have ever put on in one session has been £30 and usually it is £10/£15

I do know someone who had a gambling problem, he is quite open about it, he racked up 36K of debt, I asked him what he was spending it on and he said it was the horses and fruit machines, he had numerous credit cards which all kept on racking up the debts because of it, he said that he got further and further in because he was trying to gamble his way out of the problem which just never works, once he realized that he just stopped.

I know that doesn't help you out with your question but at least it shows that some people can just wake up one day and see that there is a problem and then stop.

---

Ahh fuck it, just roll the dice BWAHAHAHA

---

You sorted out your Somalian problem yet?

Hear what happened.... She's Peruvian, not Somali, so I have to re-strategize my attack for 2 weeks from now.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by brocktonblockbust

Hear what happened.... She's Peruvian, not Somali, so I have to re-strategize my attack for 2 weeks from now.

---

God damnit blocklebuster that's why you do you homework before rushing into these things

True, so true. But altruistically I have given the filthy cunt an extra 2 weeks of food stamps and SSI. Trying to look on the bright side, she's in Connecticut so @walrus actually pays her pittance.

Not to familiar with gambling but have done well with the roulette and quarter slots :-X in the past. It has to be a bit different from substance addiction which is more internal 'fix' where gambling for short immediate gains can be directly result to her current economics or lack there of. If she kept all of her earnings would she still be in debt and unable to provide? Not struggling, we all struggle. People want a quick fix, just one big score and sometimes ease the mind as it's "easier" to justify. Financially it would seem you need much more money-collateral to feed a gambling addiction than to cycle through drugs or alcohol. It's also much more socially expectable and readily available in the age of point and click.

Yeah there isn't much I can do if she doesn't want to stop but she has hinted to me she knows it's a problem.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Yeah there isn't much I can do if she doesn't want to stop but she has hinted to me she knows it's a problem.

---

As with nearly everything today there are support groups available and made convenient. You lose nothing but maybe an hour to go sit in one and maybe she can find other support among fellow gamblers. They even have donuts if you're lucky!

No, I haven't Walrus (that I know of), but I would imagine that gambling is an addiction like many others. So the addict can have many reasons why they do it, and they can talk really lucidly about it, and they can seee it's wrong ...... but they just can't help themselves, or deal with the overriding compulsion to keep,doing it.

I'm really really not experienced in this and it sounds like you want to help her out

I don't want to be an internet expert in something I'm not. Sorry I can't help from a position of any knowledge, but kudos to you for caring.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by X

No, I haven't Walrus (that I know of), but I would imagine that gambling is an addiction like many others. So the addict can have many reasons why they do it, and they can talk really lucidly about it, and they can seee it's wrong ...... but they just can't help themselves, or deal with the overriding compulsion to keep,doing it.

I'm really really not experienced in this and it sounds like you want to help her out

I don't want to be an internet expert in something I'm not. Sorry I can't help from a position of any knowledge, but kudos to you for caring.

---

Well thanks X she is just a young girl who as I said has had a very tough life. Before I knew had bad she was I was going to have her place a bet for me on golovkin v canelo but now I will stay away from such a move. Anyway I'll just keep looking around for info and thanks guys

Plus women betting on sporting events is never gunna end well (sorry I couldn't resist)

They let a damaged person raise foster kids and that person is now gambling the rent money thus putting those children at risk? What the heck?

Gambling is apparently like other addictions including drug addictions and cravings for political power. It hits the same dopamine receptors and basically creates a high for the person. Like Master said, she needs to accept that she has a problem and seek help. Trouble is if she is does not want to change, then she won't change. My main concern in this story is not the woman, but the kids. People are free to screw themselves up as much as they like, but please never hurt the kids.

That is one thing I don't like about the west. The gambling is at extreme levels. In the UK you see a bookie on almost every street corner and any pug knows that they win. Yet, people go in there for their fix and it is a fix. Many of the punters are there day in day out feeding it. They might not even be staking a lot but they are looking for that dopamine high.

Personally I think it is wrong as the poorest people put their money on it hoping to 'win', but they would be better off investing that money and a few years later actually getting some real tangible benefits. It's a form of decadence and personally I would like to see it banned. It is banned out here and people are then free to do other things with their money.

@Gandalf I really think you have been out of the UK for far too long if that is shocking to you. Unfortunately that is the way it is here. Everything is just going by the Mindless stipulations and statutes of laws without any common sense or good decisions. This has become a country of super-charged self-entitlement totally out of control. People are afraid to speak up or enforce the law or use common sense. That is where we are now

I have been gone a long time, but I think it is not long enough. Interestingly on the topic of the quality of life between the '50's and today, betting shops were not introduced in the UK until 1961. This is further evidence that 1950's life was just more moral, decent, and proper. Society has fallen. Even online gambling is illegal here. People try and get around it, but it is illegal. It's good for society.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

They let a damaged person raise foster kids and that person is now gambling the rent money thus putting those children at risk? What the heck?

Gambling is apparently like other addictions including drug addictions and cravings for political power. It hits the same dopamine receptors and basically creates a high for the person. Like Master said, she needs to accept that she has a problem and seek help. Trouble is if she is does not want to change, then she won't change. My main concern in this story is not the woman, but the kids. People are free to screw themselves up as much as they like, but please never hurt the kids.

That is one thing I don't like about the west. The gambling is at extreme levels. In the UK you see a bookie on almost every street corner and any pug knows that they win. Yet, people go in there for their fix and it is a fix. Many of the punters are there day in day out feeding it. They might not even be staking a lot but they are looking for that dopamine high.

Personally I think it is wrong as the poorest people put their money on it hoping to 'win', but they would be better off investing that money and a few years later actually getting some real tangible benefits. It's a form of decadence and personally I would like to see it banned. It is banned out here and people are then free to do other things with their money.

---

Miles it's banned in china but they go nutz gambling there

Asia is the biggest place for gambling in the world, it's certainly not a west thing. In London it's not a coincidence that in asain areas (chinese) there are betting shops littered all over the high streets. Yet betting shops today only exist because of the fruit machines (BOTS), anyone that puts a pound in one of them needs shooting so would be no great loss to society.

Before legal betting shops people used to gamble just the same. My mum and the other kids would be sent to the man on the street corner for the adults in the community.

I use betting shops once in a bluemoon these days but years ago they were full of old boys, it seemed like a social thing, a daily chinwag and cup of tea. Today we have internet forums. Nothing really changes.

It's completely illegal here, though I don't know about China or Japan. I think it is good thing for society. I know of people who are careful with their computers and do it online though. I really like that you don't see pay day lenders or bookies on the streets. It's kind of nice. But yes, when I used to work in that area back home a lot of the clientele were Chinese. A lot of restaurant owners and staff looking to kill time or get their dopamine hit before getting to work. I used to think it was normal, but I have changed a lot.

http://www.korealaw.com/sub/informat...rate&brdIdx=62

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Fenster

Asia is the biggest place for gambling in the world, it's certainly not a west thing. In London it's not a coincidence that in asain areas (chinese) there are betting shops littered all over the high streets. Yet betting shops today only exist because of the fruit machines (BOTS), anyone that puts a pound in one of them needs shooting so would be no great loss to society.

Before legal betting shops people used to gamble just the same. My mum and the other kids would be sent to the man on the street corner for the adults in the community.

I use betting shops once in a bluemoon these days but years ago they were full of old boys, it seemed like a social thing, a daily chinwag and cup of tea. Today we have internet forums. Nothing really changes.

---

Exactly old fellas betting loose change on the nags to pass the day away. Gambling and boxing are absolutely intertwined and the idea that things should be banned is usually bandied about by the same people that would have boxing itself made illegal.

Who are the people that want to ban boxing and gambling then? I don't see many countries doing that. Typical Beanz propaganda. The UK is weird with bookies on every street corner. Most countries don't operate like that. On the other hand boxing is near universal.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Who are the people that want to ban boxing and gambling then? I don't see many countries doing that. Typical Beanz propaganda. The UK is weird with bookies on every street corner. Most countries don't operate like that. On the other hand boxing is near universal.

---

Miles you seem to want to be the expert on everything. The UK is not weird just because you do not agree with it. Do you not realise how many Casinos etc sponsor boxing and how intertwined both boxing and gambling are? You seem to want to ban anything you don't do yourself, it is the logical extension of your intolerance.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Beanz

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Who are the people that want to ban boxing and gambling then? I don't see many countries doing that. Typical Beanz propaganda. The UK is weird with bookies on every street corner. Most countries don't operate like that. On the other hand boxing is near universal.

---

Miles you seem to want to be the expert on everything. The UK is not weird just because you do not agree with it. Do you not realise how many Casinos etc sponsor boxing and how intertwined both boxing and gambling are? You seem to want to ban anything you don't do yourself, it is the logical extension of your intolerance.

---

And this is the point that the thread descends into the usual Beanz v Gandalf v Brock v whoever else and completely gets off track.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Batman

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Beanz

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Who are the people that want to ban boxing and gambling then? I don't see many countries doing that. Typical Beanz propaganda. The UK is weird with bookies on every street corner. Most countries don't operate like that. On the other hand boxing is near universal.

---

Miles you seem to want to be the expert on everything. The UK is not weird just because you do not agree with it. Do you not realise how many Casinos etc sponsor boxing and how intertwined both boxing and gambling are? You seem to want to ban anything you don't do yourself, it is the logical extension of your intolerance.

---

And this is the point that the thread descends into the usual Beanz v Gandalf v Brock v whoever else and completely gets off track.

---

I apologise but if you agree that the UK is weird because of having bookies, feel free to say so.

Are fights here held in casinos? In the UK? Most countries? I thought we were talking about bookies actually and yes they have historically been frowned upon. It isn't only me that disagrees with them, it is also the legislature of many countries around the world and I happen to think it quite sensible policy. You can agree or disagree, but yes, the UK does look a bit weird in that respect through the eyes of many people around the world. It might be normal to you, but then you think healthy thin people look ill. You are too used to seeing things in an 'odd' way.

I am not sure one needs to be an expert on gambling to have a rational discussion about it's ethics within a society anyway. I worked in the industry several years and have lived in a country with no gambling to see the pros and cons. Quite a lot of people develop serious addictions and it has got worse with the machines they now have in most shops.

Yes please beanz please not every thread needs to be about you. But @Gandalf I have to agree I don't think this girl taking in three foster children when she has two of her own is the wisest move. She does it because her own childhood was so fucked up so she wishes to bring happiness to homeless children which is noble but oddly I think it's almost selfish she does this while betting the rent on a football or baseball etc game. She obviously has a good heart and I like to help her all I can but the greatest help she can receive now is not of the material type. I've given her hundreds of dollars worth of tools as she is refurbishing one of the kids rooms. I know that sounds real generous but I actually get the tools for free so it really isn't. Anyway I'm sure you all have certain people you come accross you could do more for but it's not always possible

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Yes please beanz please not every thread needs to be about you. But @Gandalf I have to agree I don't think this girl taking in three foster children when she has two of her own is the wisest move. She does it because her own childhood was so fucked up so she wishes to bring happiness to homeless children which is noble but oddly I think it's almost selfish she does this while betting the rent on a football or baseball etc game. She obviously has a good heart and I like to help her all I can but the greatest help she can receive now is not of the material type. I've given her hundreds of dollars worth of tools as she is refurbishing one of the kids rooms. I know that sounds real generous but I actually get the tools for free so it really isn't. Anyway I'm sure you all have certain people you come accross you could do more for but it's not always possible

---

how does she do her betting? does she do it online?

if she does it online then perhaps in a jokey sort of way 'bet' her that she couldn't disable her account for a whole month and not place any bets at all, tell her to keep tabs on how much money she saves just for a single month, it could be the wake up call she needs.

kind of like how smokers don't actually realise how much money they spend on fags.

Most online bookies have an option to disable your account for a week/month or an amount of time chosen by the user

Good idea batman but no she has a book. He even prints receipts stating the wages, over and under, odds and payouts. The damn things are printed out on a receipt similar to what you get at the grocery store. It's run out of a bodega which is what we call the little convenience stores in bad parts of town

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Good idea batman but no she has a book. He even prints receipts stating the wages, over and under, odds and payouts. The damn things are printed out on a receipt similar to what you get at the grocery store. It's run out of a bodega which is what we call the little convenience stores in bad parts of town

---

In that case the only thing you can do is shag her and steal her bank cards

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Are fights here held in casinos? In the UK? Most countries? I thought we were talking about bookies actually and yes they have historically been frowned upon. It isn't only me that disagrees with them, it is also the legislature of many countries around the world and I happen to think it quite sensible policy. You can agree or disagree, but yes, the UK does look a bit weird in that respect through the eyes of many people around the world. It might be normal to you, but then you think healthy thin people look ill. You are too used to seeing things in an 'odd' way.

I am not sure one needs to be an expert on gambling to have a rational discussion about it's ethics within a society anyway. I worked in the industry several years and have lived in a country with no gambling to see the pros and cons. Quite a lot of people develop serious addictions and it has got worse with the machines they now have in most shops.

---

:vd:
The last two cards I worked were sponsored by a Casino, the weigh-in was in a casino and the after fight party was in a casino. There is nothing odd about me not finding bookies on UK streets not at all weird. Since when do we have to be like everyone else? I know you used to work in one but that is no reason to go full on ex-smoker vigilante about it.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Batman

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by walrus

Good idea batman but no she has a book. He even prints receipts stating the wages, over and under, odds and payouts. The damn things are printed out on a receipt similar to what you get at the grocery store. It's run out of a bodega which is what we call the little convenience stores in bad parts of town

---

In that case the only thing you can do is shag her and steal her bank cards

---

Brilliant, I hate to say it but I think she digs me. I could never do it though, I'm married

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Beanz

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Are fights here held in casinos? In the UK? Most countries? I thought we were talking about bookies actually and yes they have historically been frowned upon. It isn't only me that disagrees with them, it is also the legislature of many countries around the world and I happen to think it quite sensible policy. You can agree or disagree, but yes, the UK does look a bit weird in that respect through the eyes of many people around the world. It might be normal to you, but then you think healthy thin people look ill. You are too used to seeing things in an 'odd' way.

I am not sure one needs to be an expert on gambling to have a rational discussion about it's ethics within a society anyway. I worked in the industry several years and have lived in a country with no gambling to see the pros and cons. Quite a lot of people develop serious addictions and it has got worse with the machines they now have in most shops.

---

:vd:
The last two cards I worked were sponsored by a Casino, the weigh-in was in a casino and the after fight party was in a casino. There is nothing odd about me not finding bookies on UK streets not at all weird. Since when do we have to be like everyone else? I know you used to work in one but that is no reason to go full on ex-smoker vigilante about it.

---

You are moving the goalposts with the boxing/casino link anyway. Boxing can get its sponsorship from anywhere. Yet they choose to associate with casinos which are regarded as immoral around the world for how they make money from money. They are like banks and loansharks, except it has a spin to make it more fun, they market themselves as leisure, when it is really diluted form of banking. Again, bad for society. There was an episode of Theroux on this and people seemed to be down losing most of the time then the occasional dopamine rush would keep them in. It's like bloodsports with the human psyche. Cruel. They will always win overall.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Beanz

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Gandalf

Are fights here held in casinos? In the UK? Most countries? I thought we were talking about bookies actually and yes they have historically been frowned upon. It isn't only me that disagrees with them, it is also the legislature of many countries around the world and I happen to think it quite sensible policy. You can agree or disagree, but yes, the UK does look a bit weird in that respect through the eyes of many people around the world. It might be normal to you, but then you think healthy thin people look ill. You are too used to seeing things in an 'odd' way.

I am not sure one needs to be an expert on gambling to have a rational discussion about it's ethics within a society anyway. I worked in the industry several years and have lived in a country with no gambling to see the pros and cons. Quite a lot of people develop serious addictions and it has got worse with the machines they now have in most shops.

---

:vd:
The last two cards I worked were sponsored by a Casino, the weigh-in was in a casino and the after fight party was in a casino. There is nothing odd about me not finding bookies on UK streets not at all weird. Since when do we have to be like everyone else? I know you used to work in one but that is no reason to go full on ex-smoker vigilante about it.

---

You are moving the goalposts with the boxing/casino link anyway. Boxing can get its sponsorship from anywhere. Yet they choose to associate with casinos which are regarded as immoral around the world for how they make money from money. They are like banks and loansharks, except it has a spin to make it more fun, they market themselves as leisure, when it is really diluted form of banking. Again, bad for society. There was an episode of Theroux on this and people seemed to be down losing most of the time then the occasional dopamine rush would keep them in. It's like bloodsports with the human psyche. Cruel. They will always win overall.

---

BWAHAHAHA!

You literally could not make it up. Here you are comparing Casinos to bloodsports and then saying there is no link between boxing and gambling. Casinos are often entertainment venues nowadays people go there to watch sports events and eat food, get drunk not just gamble on the tables etc. They are supporting boxing from the grassroots up and yet all this condemnation from you. Where has this goalpost thing come from? Don't lets make the entire forum into a rigid i will list the points and you will answer in numbered bullet points or some pissing contest where someone has to WIN the argument. It's always used to be a freeform jazz kind of forum with a bit of Carry On, Monty Python and Animal House , SNL thrown in. Let's not get all College Jocks initiating the freshers about it.

"Cruel"

;D


People would say boxing is cruel. Adults can do what they like with their money if they want to be irresponsible who are me and you to lecture them about it?

Boxing can and does exist without casino's. But that is not the argument. We were originally talking about bookies and they are illegal all over the world becuase of the harmful societal impact it has. I can argue that more tomorrow if you like, but boxing is not reliant on casinos. Go to asia and see where they fight.

Not sure what you boys are arguing about (lol) but I keep seeing asia, casino and gambling.

The gambling turnover in Macau is bigger than Vegas, it's not a coincidence boxing (Pacquiao, Arum's stable, Chinese stars like Zou) fight there. Hong Kong, Singapore their gambling industry makes Britain look like occasional dabblers... Japan has a huge superb horse racing industry with a parimutuel gambling system.

There are no betting shops in America either.

I speak for Korea only and it is that gambling is mostly illegal. I prefer that TBH. China or Japan ....other worlds to me really.

Korea uses the Parimutuel gambling system too. The only difference between the UK and S.Korea/USA is you can't get knicked for choosing how to spend your own money in public

Explain with more detail. What do you mean?

So any way to get things back on topic, we were talking about walrus' soon to be bit on the side, does he shag her and steal her credit card or just kill her kids?

Or have any of you bright sparks got any better ideas