I met Santa Claus at lunchtime.....

[Mark TKO]

...he was walking round town with one of his little helpers looking completely miserable.

I went up to him and said "What's up Santa ?"

He said "Oh problems, problems...the steering's gone on the sleigh, the satellite dish isn't working in the house and I can't get Sky Sports Two, the wife's moaning the spare bedroom needs decorating, it's bloody freezing and we've got a leak on one of our taps in the kitchen..."

I said "Not to worry Santa, the main thing is you've still got your elf "

[CutMeMick]

You've had better days Mark.

[CFH]

I just threw up a little bit...