Woman Troubles

[raleights]

Maybe Starr lives in a fantasy land where everthing just works itself out - naive

I can see why she thinks the way she does, alot of people are touchy feely, hold me hold me. Human nature has other ideas
Not saying human nature can't be stopped, it just doesn't sound like this girl is has that ability

[Purist]

bottom line, shes weighing her options

other bottom line, he is still on her mind and she cares about him enough to tell her.

He needs to show an understanding to her situation because she has feelings for him otherwise she would have never told him.

She told him.. and now its up to him to comfurt her and show her that he wants to understand what she's going through so she doesn't have to feel alone going through it. Show how much she really cares for her by CARING for her instead of thinking of himself. Then she will think of him too instead of herself.

Like I said I'm done, its up to him. But following your advice is going to get him hurt real real real real bad!

Maybe Starr lives in a fantasy land where everthing just works itself out - naive

I can see why she thinks the way she does, alot of people are touchy feely, hold me hold me. Human nature has other ideas
Not saying human nature can't be stopped, it just doesn't sound like this girl is has that ability

Your ignorance is showing.

1) she called him and told him what happened
2) she was honest about her feelings and didn't sugar coat anything
3) she needs someone to be there for her

What you need to do is BE THERE FOR HER!!

That way

1) if she makes that decision to leave, you weren't the reason
2) that way you won't be blaming yourself for things you didn't do and should have done

The second option what they are saying to do will do 3 things

1) show you don't care as much
2) push her away and she WILL leave you then 100 percent guaranteed
3) You will blame yourself forever for not doing things you SHOULD have like being there for her in her time of need instead of selfishly thinking only of your own. Because she apparently is thinking of your needs right now too, because

1) she told you
and 2) she's still with you.

[Howlin Mad Missy]

bottom line, shes weighing her options

and needs to be told how troubling it is that while with you, she's thinking of someone else

X is right - bang her one last time and be done with it - and when you're doing it, think of Mad_Dog

he'll apreciate that

bottom line is she told him and is clearly upset, perhaps the guilt she feels is from the memory of this guy and that she might think she shouldn't feel anything for him while she's with SOBO.
As I've already stated someone I was very close, I still care about the guy, if someone meant alot to you you can not wipe those feelings away. If he called me I'd probably meet up and say hi but it wouldn't go further. The past is the past

[raleights]

First of all, if you're under 30 years old and trying to tell me you've been around and truely know what love is....... enough said

No offense starr but it sounds like you havn't had a very harsh life, which is a great thing happy for you but like I said this is all a bit naive. Sounds like you're trying to convince the guy theres noone else in the world for him, wrooooooooooong. Theres plenty of people out there, some of which won't cry at the sight of an old boyfriend - who won't have you going apeshit all day long thinking about if you've been betrayed or not.

Once again no offense to starr but shes a young girl who has a bit of a know it all complex. She's making some valid points but you really can't trust anyone. If you really think you can trust your life with another you're more cracked out than Zab Judah (thats pretty cracked out)....

When you realize that noone is to be trusted to the fullest extent, it becomes a shield that you wear at all times (a necessary one). You really shouldn't need someone else to be complete, a spouse is just a perk

and btw earlier Missy refered to my parents as weak and shes right..just as this girl is weak for crying at the sight of her old boyfriend

[raleights]

No matter what, if you're genuinly a good person which SOBO sounds like he is...then you're gonna get hurt, it's not a matter of if

Don't present to him the illusion of true love being real. It's not, we're all capable of seeking other options

Some of us have more resistance than others

[X]

Hilarious thread - with lots of interesting, yet strangely meaningless, psychobabble

SOBO - just shag the bitch one more time, then dump her, then find the other guy and break one of his elbows.

Problem sorted, vengeance exacted, dignity intact.

Move on.

I told you not to start this thread !! :P

[Steelie]

See SOBO my beautiful Missy (the most sexiest of them all IMO) proves my point


women want to have their cake and eat it too. You are the nice guy, the romantic one, she feels safe with you but with the other guy, she saw an adventure. live and learn youngster live and learn.

Guys can be both, they're harder to find but they are out there.

[Mad_Dog]

I think Raleights hit the nail on the head.

if you must learn something from this SOBO is learn that you have options. Yes you love this girl but don't approach whatever solution that you undertake with the mindset of "she is the only one for me". Truth is she is not. There are many out there for you.

take care SOBO

[Mad_Dog]

Hilarious thread - with lots of interesting, yet strangely meaningless, psychobabble

SOBO - just shag the bitch one more time, then dump her, then find the other guy and break one of his elbows.

Problem sorted, vengeance exacted, dignity intact.

Move on.

I told you not to start this thread !! :P

mine is not meaningless how dare you!

[X]

Hilarious thread - with lots of interesting, yet strangely meaningless, psychobabble

SOBO - just shag the bitch one more time, then dump her, then find the other guy and break one of his elbows.

Problem sorted, vengeance exacted, dignity intact.

Move on.

I told you not to start this thread !! :P

mine is not meaningless how dare you!

Easy boy - yours must have been the interesting bit.



























Or the strange stuff

[raleights]

Lets start a thread on how to fuck someone over if they cheat on you

that would be productive

[Purist]

Lets start a thread on how to fuck someone over if they cheat on you

that would be productive

did she cheat on him? um NO!!!

[X]

Leopard's whiskers.

During the Mau Mau uprising in East Africa, they would grind leopard's whiskers into a fine powder and sprinkle it on your food. Once in your stomach, it reacts with the acid and expands massively, shredding the inside of your stomach.

You literally shit out your guts and die in considerable pain.

Your digestive juices also then continue to break down the leopards' whiskers, so there is no evidence.

Do you think SOBO could get hold of some? I am not sure that a tabby cat's whiskers will have the same effect?

[SOBO]

lots of good idea's and opinions, thanks for all of them, but sorry guys, I really don't want to lose this one, sure she is the first one I have loved, and I think going your way will not solve my situation,

I do NOT think she did anything with him, like physically, because there were other people there, and I asked her, she told me that she didn't, I believe her. Maybe she was just emotional at the fact that she was thinking about him, and needed to here my voice, I dunno... but I do not think she was cheating on me, or is.

I mean I thought about it, how bout if we did break up, and lets say 2 years down the road, I am with another chick, and this one i see at a bar again one time, and she tells me she still loves me, I mean, I for sure would have thogoughts running through my head of her and the times we have shared, so in that case I see where she is coming from, and I understand that,

but i mean this guy, yes is a friend etc. I dont want this to happen everytime she sees him, well a slong as he doesn't say he loves her all the time, I gotta have a chat with him when i do see him, b/c he has fucked this over nicely for me. I mean she did love him, I think, not like, they were younger, so nothign really happened, she just had a lot of fun with him, (not sexually) and I guess at one point did like, she told me in the car when I asked her,"what did you think" she said "why couldn't you have said this 2 years ago. and that the only reason she was happy, (b/c this guy left the school after two years,) was becasue I came into her life, and made her forget about him. He is just here for the summer, and going back to school at the other end of the country at the end of summer so... but I dont want her to think of him all the time, you know, like everytime she see's him, she'll think what if, worse if she acts on it, I dont tihnk she will.

Whaever the case may be, I am definalty going out with her on thursday if she decides to go, and this guy "happens" to show up as well, I am not going to leave him with her at some bar,

again, thanks for all the thoughts, i have not been able to stop thinkig about this, which is bad since I got night school and a exam this tues, lol

so I am going to talk to her tonight, let her know that I am there, if she needs me, and that I want to help her through this, she has however said she needs to think this throught hereself, (what could she be thinking about, I mean the good times they have had? does she want to go out with this guy?? like i don't know, hopefully it passes, soon. ) Thanks, and I guess i can keep you guys updated as the situation goes,


Thanks again,

[Purist]

so I am going to talk to her tonight, let her know that I am there, if she needs me, and that I want to help her through this,

THAT is the right thing to do.