What is your perfect day?

[p4pking]

I wake up in my volcano lair, do some lines of pure cocaine, have gorgeous women from all walks of life massage and fellate me. Whichever has the least talent gets to help Gordon Ramsay while he makes my breakfast in silence, as I throw shit at him and laugh. Meanwhile Bobby McFerrin and Yo yo ma play me a duet of Duke Ellingtons Creole love call, dressed as court jesters. I then run for congress, win, and bring some violent criminals from classified locations to me, off the grid. They line up dressed as oompa loompas, before I pimp slap them one by one then hurl them into the depths of my volcano with a captive audience of priests who must laugh in the name of Jesus or face the same fate. Then I go scuba diving just outside in some immense caves until I get to one of those really gorgeous underground chambers with a salt pool, where more women and live music awaits me. I eat some Beluga caviar and drink absinthe with them until I get bored, and teleport back to the surface because swimming upwards is boring. All that's void is coming to find you, throw your computer off a cliff and then have some words with you about how depressing your perfect day is.