To love someone means to see him as God intended him.
Fyodor Dostoevsky
Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.
Kurt Vonnegut
I enjoy slaughtering beasts, and I think of my relatives constantly.
Roger Zelazny

While I had often said that I wanted to die in bed, what I really meant was that in my old age I wanted to be stepped on by an elephant while making love.
Roger Zelazny
All murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.
Voltaire
Call on God, but row away from the rocks.
Hunter S. Thompson
I don't learn so good, no matter how good the teacher is.
Warren Zevon