Guy wakes up in hell and is thoroughly bummed out.
The devil asks what the problem is.
Guy replies. I'm in hell that's the problem.

The devil asks do you like drinking?
Guy replies sure I like drinking.
Devil says well you are going to love Mondays. You can drink for 24 hours.
Guy says wow that's great.

The devil asks do you like smoking pot?
Guy replies yes I like smoking pot.
Devil says well you are going to love Tuesdays. Smoke weed 24 hours.
Guy replies wow this is starting to look great.

The devil asks do you like gambling?
Guy replies yes I like gambling.
Devil says well you are going to love Wednesdays then. Gamble for 24 hours.
Guy replies this has got to be heaven not hell.

Then the devil asks you dont happen to be gay are ya?
Guy replies well no I'm not.
Devil replies well you are going to hate Thursdays.