My plan is to start the self ban on Jan 1st and hopefully, find a new me in that time. A little how Gandalf changed from the gray to the white. A new perspective and a new robe and the absence of beard dye. I need to learn to be more communal as I used to be long ago, instead of this nihilist, burning on his own fractured past. Basically, a strongly opinionated person, but who will treat others better, who will suggest change rather than hammer it home with a rusty nail into an open eye socket.