My girlfriend started to taking a small Sylvester Stallone doll to bed a few months ago. It been a little rocky between us ever since.
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My girlfriend started to taking a small Sylvester Stallone doll to bed a few months ago. It been a little rocky between us ever since.
Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.
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The Tube strike has been called off, so I've still got somewhere to store my pringles.
Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.
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A G N B
That's bang out of order
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Wind turbines
I'm a big fan
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Here's a bit of advice for you
Advi
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Do you know what really makes me smile ?
Facial muscles
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A family walks into a hotel and the father goes to the front desk and says "I hope the porn is disabled" The guy at the desk replies. "It's just regular porn you sick fuck"
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I went to the Zoo and some fool dropped a Penguin into the Polo bear pit the bear
was going mad trying to get the wrapper off.![]()
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I got some sick jokes not sure if you all ready for them so don't take it to serious okay? its includes some shitty stuff that happen a few days ago. It's about a mass killing in a school in trollhättan. a guy walked in with a sword and killed one teacher and one student.
Ida: Whats the most popular fish in Trollhättan?
Alex: Swordfish....
Ida: Why did he kill people in school?
Alex: He wanted the american exchange student to feel like home
don't judge, people are sick and put these jokes out there.
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How do we know what Father Christmas has for dinner?
He posts it on Santagram.
You can check his bank account for groceries, he’s with Santander.
Why does not anyone trust Jeremy Corbyn to put up the Christmas tree?
Because it always leans to the left.
Why don’t Volkswagen hold Christmas services?
They get their readings wrong.
Why did Santa pour lemsip into the chimney?
He was coming down with the flu
Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.
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I've decided its time to sell all my dogging gear on ebay. No bids yet but plenty of people watching.
A policeman knocked at my door last night. He held up a picture and asked is this your wife sir? I said yes. He said I'm afraid it looks like she's been hit by a bus. I said I know, but she's really good with the children.
When God said to the both of us "Which one of you wants to be Sugar Ray?" I guess I didnt raise my hand fast enough
Charley Burley
I have a phobia of German sausages.....I always fear the wurst
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Adam Johnson has had his contract with Adidas terminated. Shame, if anyone was tailor made to wear predator boots it was him.
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My wife came home last night smelling of candy floss. I think she is having a fair.
Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.
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