Is there slavery in the U.K.?

If that's the case, I'd quite like one. Or even better, maybe a whole family would be better.

They could live in my shed. The guy could do the gardening and general maintenance work, he could also drive us to the pub and back. Being the sexist that I am, the wife could do all th cooking and cleaning.

It would be good if thy had a kid too. Because then I would be breeding and developing a successor for when I have to have one of the parents put down. While they are growing up, they could be a footstool for when I watch TV on the sofa.