Worst Jobs.

Stacking shelves at 16 for £1.50 an hour. I was once sent to pick up a trolley that had been dumped about a mile from the store. My boss told me I had to wear my gray overall but I could remove my tie as it was a scorching hot summers day. As a complete fucktard I walked the whole mile in sweltering heat with my overall on and the on way back a seagle shit on me.

Packing fish in a stinking fish factory. I hated the other staff. The first day I arrived my co worker sent me to ask the boss for a 'long weight'. He said 'Hold on I'll go and get it for you' and I was left there standing like a twat for 30 minutes. Another day they sent me to this crazy huge guy who looked just like Tank Abbot to ask him for some 'H & G Sprats'. H & G means headless and gutted and sprats are about the size of tadpoles so obviously another cruel taunt. The crates were also crawling with those harvest man daddy longlegs spiders which I very foolishly told people I hated. Strangely enough after that I would always be looking down onto my shoulder and would see one sitting there prompting to rip my clothes off to howls of laughter from the low IQ guys I had to work with.

Working in a trifle making factory. I stood on a production line making sure the cream and jam went into the cups correctly. I also made cardboard boxes.


My best Job.

Getting cancer! Seriously being told I would never have to work again was the greatest day of my fucking life!