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    Default Fantanas Guide to dealing with Heart Break

    Fantanas Guide to dealing with Heart Break

    A HMHT has experienced pretty much all that life has to offer including the delights of being able to talk with moderately attractive women without them throwing up. Heart Break is one of those things which can make even the most rugged real man, such as myself, loose his way. The reason Hearts Break is scientifically proven to be related to dehydration, lack of sexy time and your lovers mother. You can take care of the first two by drinking more fluoride free water and buying some new white socks (or for the smaller member getting free white socks from megabowl). The third one however is just one of those things which cannot be changed, like annoying Welsh people. Rather than stewing in your own mess all alone just follow this effective guide to make sure you can deal with something almost as painful as blue ball syndrome.

    4 Simple Steps to kicking Cupids Ass

    1)The last thing you need is to be constantly reminded of that girl you were physical with, sexually I mean. Get rid of anything that will remind you of her. Photos, clothes or used rubber you left lying on the floor to show off to friends. All of these things need to be put somewhere like in your collection of old girlfriends shit or disposed off, perhaps clinically. Out of sight, out of mind. Just use the same thing you had to do when you couldn’t drop off your little soldiers in a timely fashion when with her, think of other girls.
    2)HMHTs are like tigers, strong, muscular and menacing but never ginger. Ever. Like tigers HMHTs can not stand to be caged, unless of course it is with a hot women who is on heat. What you need to do is go out, explore the land and have a lot of fun, in a non gay way. Make plans for every single day but remember to work them around your bowls of coco pops with manwhiches. You may have other less important commitments like work or funerals, don’t neglect them completely, but don’t engulf yourself in them because that would be hiding the problem like you would hide a flesh wound in a gun fight. Or fat in a shirts off showdown. You need to deal with this head on and take it violently from behind, no pun intended.
    3)Surround yourself with people, other HMHTs would be ideal. However, standard humans will do. You will constantly be reminded how much better you are than them and this will of course make you feel much better. You can laugh at their short comings and point them out to raise your own status. It is ok to let these dip-shits know you are hurting inside, in a non gay way, as it will make you appear slightly vulnerable and they will offer to buy you things. If it stops working start acting more Heart Broken, maybe put on a loose fitting top rather than a muscle clinger.
    4)Something done over again and again will create a habit or an anchor. An anchor is something which for example when you are feeling low and you hear a song enough times while in that low state will trigger an emotion. The next time you hear that song even if you are happy you will be put into a low state again. Don’t allow this to happen because you don’t want to be in the middle of a Shirts off Showdown with an arch rival and “Akon – It don’t matter comes” on and your routine falls apart. Habits are done over and over again and can become part of your everyday life. Humans have many habits which when observed from the superior perspective of a HMHT seem utterly insane or pointless. It creates for them a comfort zone they don’t want to be removed from. Make sure whatever your habits are they are positive and inline with what a HMHT should be doing like picking on Galiens but never making bare skin contact with them.

    Final Thoughts

    A Broken Heart may take a long time to heal, even longer than your relationship lasted, so we are dealing with perhaps 2 and half weeks. It is important to stick to the guide and not drift away in a blaze of horniness desperation. If you feel physically sick a couple of tablespoons of Calpol will help. Make sure you get an adult to open the lid for you as those bastards are tricky. A Broken Heart needs fixing all alone, other women will not do this for you. I mean how could they, they are there for entertainment and not for self improvement. You will need to work on yourself and not use or rely on others to do this for you. You’re a HMHT for fucks sake, you’re capable of putting together even the trickiest of self assembly furniture. This means dealing with a Broken Heart is a walk in the park, late on a Friday night looking for a lady named Vixen. Heart Break will happen because as a HMHT, such as myself, you wear your heart on your sleeve. The first time will always be the hardest to deal with due to inexperience. The other times maybe harder, no pun intended, but easier to get through as you know where to go, no pun intended.

    Yours in manliness,

    Fantana
    5 foot 4 inches and 154 lbs of PURE MAN

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    To turn this around mate you are 19 it was one year out of your life, i know it sounds hard but this could have dragged on for years and messed up your life rather than just a year... i know it dosnt feel good to hear this but its better this happened now than later.

    hell your already back with your mates who you aint seen in ages and i'm guessing that is because of this relationship so....

    my advice is to get out there and fuck everything till your cock drops off... your 19 FFS you wont get these years back and will have plenty of time to fall in love later mate.

    life a cunt somtimes but you have had a lucky escape you just dont relise it yet

    keep your chin up mate

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    yep you are only 19 - get out there and nail bitch for the next few years

    one day it will all be over...make the most of it
    Don't bully fat kids - they've got enough on their plate

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Snake eyes...

    Chin up my Oz partner.... I'm sure theres a shit load of hot ass Oz girls out there ready to be banged.... So go out there and make me proud...

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    And in the words of Amy Winehouse..... 'Love is a loosing game'

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Quote Originally Posted by Saddo View Post
    To turn this around mate you are 19 it was one year out of your life, i know it sounds hard but this could have dragged on for years and messed up your life rather than just a year... i know it dosnt feel good to hear this but its better this happened now than later.

    hell your already back with your mates who you aint seen in ages and i'm guessing that is because of this relationship so....

    my advice is to get out there and fuck everything till your cock drops off... your 19 FFS you wont get these years back and will have plenty of time to fall in love later mate.

    life a cunt somtimes but you have had a lucky escape you just dont relise it yet

    keep your chin up mate
    This is good advice. Get out with your mates and just have a good time.

    Chances are this girl is fucking someone else anyway.

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    I'm out after this because it isn't working but to echo what myself, saddo and others have said:

    Don't drag her down with the 'I love you stuff'... you'll come across as desperate/my hormones are all over the shop/unattractive/over imposing... I could go on and on.

    and for the love of god don't tell her that story unless you enjoy being laughed at!!!!!!!

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Snakey, listen to Saddo, Adam, and Kel. I don't want to be mean or anything, but you obviously do not have a lot of experience with girls or relationships. This girl does not want to be with you, that is why she broke up with you. She did it over the phone after a year long relationship, what does this tell you about the level of respect she has for you? And don't give me any bullshit about her being really sensitive etc., if she was that sensitive she would have considered your feelings and broke up with you face to face instead of being a coward and doing it over the phone, thus being considerate only of herself. Like Kel said, she's probably fucking someone else, it might have even be the reason she broke it off; regardless, she does not want you and probably never will again, you need to understand that - it will make what you are going through much easier. Why would you waste your time chasing after someone who does not want to be with you? It makes no sense. The best thing you can do is to go out and have a good time and try to get laid. Like Saddo said, chicks only want what seems unattainable, and most chicks like guys who are assholes, not some love-sick teenager who chases after them, regardless of what Hollywood or your mother tells you. Also, in my experience, they will not hesitate to take advantage of said love-sick teenager. Sorry to sound harsh man, but this is the truth and you need to stop obsessing about some broad who doesn't want to be with you.

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Snake eyes...

    Grow some Oz ballls, Outback style and just move on.

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    just go out find any chic that you can bang. even fat chicks just bang them and while your doing so. think of that girl you just lost and bang that wet puss harder and scream at it how much you hate her guts. hold down that chick that your bangings arm, widen her legs with your thighs and keep pounding. Tell her all your frustration tell her everything while pounding that poor innecent fat chick, just let it all out of you stomach while banging a random fat chick. Ofcourse that random fat chick won't know what the hell your talking about but don't worry she'll be too busy moaning and dripping wet to even pay attention to what your talking about as long as you sound dominant and angry while pounding her she'll just keep enjoying being ram'd.

    It works for me

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Hey snakey, we all go through this at some point. Throughout that 1 year with her hopefully you have establish yourself into her heart. If not snakey, to be honest your at the edge of a clip. First let me tell you this, women are naturally attracted to guys that can handle them gone. Or atleast a guy that can act like it. The worst thing to do is be the first one to say you miss her. Women are attracted to strong men, mentally not really physically. If she sense your doing fine without her, it will send a chemical reaction through her body to want to know why your doing fine alone. Curiousity always brings back a pussycat, take it from me. If you occupy yourself with other things besides thinking of her. Mother nature will lure her back to you. If this does not work, move on she will just cost you headache in the future if you still manage to gain her back for atleast a while.

    A bit of advice towards your next relationship if it doesn't work out with your recent ex. A women worth keeping is the one that loved you before she liked you. The best wifes are the once that never like their husband ways (leaving toilet seat down,showering only ones a week,never remember her bday,never remembers anything,farts excessively in bed,can only last a minute or two at best during sex,etc.) but never leaves his side cause she loves him.

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Suck it up, walk it off and go chase some punani!

    Long term relationships at 19 are not the way to go anyway.

    Seriously i know how you feel....i think most lads have been in your situation. I have. The best thing to do is move on as soon as. Go out with your mates, start a new hobby.

    I started weight-lifting when it happened to me. It was just something to do to replace the time that i normally spent with her.

    You'll be ok pal, your just 19. You have a lot of fun years in front of you. Now you can enjoy them without being committed to just one girl.

    I wouldn't bother trying to win her back. I think that will just lead to more heartache. After a couple of weeks without speaking to her, you might feel completely different. Good luck mate

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Ahhhh teenage love, oh how I remember that so well. My high school love and I were together for almost 5 years, and during that time we only got into 1, yes only 1 fight. Everybody thought that we were the perfect couple. We were talking about getting engaged, we were looking at rings, when BAM, he met this bitch that worked by him, and that was all she wrote. I was devastated, I couldn't eat, sleep, and I cried constantly. And what made it worse, is that he would not be honest with me, and come out and tell me that he met someone else, to which 6 months later he proposed to her, 4 months later they were married, and 1 month later she was pregnant. Talk about rubbing salt into my wound!

    I know that everyone says this, and they say it because it's true, but time does heal all wounds. It took some time for me to get over him, but I did, I allowed myself time to get through the emotional stuff, and then slowly but surely, I started to go out with my friends, and tried to meet new people.

    You said that this is her last year of school, I know that a lot of girls, and guys, start to get that itch of freedom in their senior year, and feel like they just don't want to be tied down to just one person. If she is going off to college, that can play a major roll in her decision as well.

    I have to ask you, does she seem as heartbroken as you? If not, then that right there should tell you that her feelings weren't as deep as yours. And if that is the case, would you really want to get back with someone that doesn't love you? If after a year, she doesn't love you the same way as you do her, the chances are, she never will, and if you were able to get back with her, more than likely the result will be the same, only this time you will be even more heartbroken than the first time.

    My advice to you - move on. You are only 19, and you have the best years ahead of you, so why would you want to be tied down, when you should be out having fun with your friends, and trying to meet new people? You should be taking the time to do things in your life that will help you grow as a person. Whether that is continuing your education, travel, participating in sports, or just going out and having fun with your friends. Just live life!!!!

    Trust me, you will find that one person who loves you for your heart one day, but until then, don't let this girl continue to hold you back from enjoying your life. It is obvious that you have a great heart, otherwise you would not be feeling this way, and as a woman, I respect that you, and the other guys here, are sharing your feelings so publicly, not many guys would, so I commend you guys for being so open.

    The biggest hurdle for you right now, is understanding the why, especially since it seems that she really hasn't given enough of a reason. When it happened to me, that was the hardest part to deal with, not knowing why. So, I would ask her to please at least have enough respect for you, and for what you shared for a year, to be honest with you about her reasons. Tell her that you respect her wanting to break-up, but you just want to be able to understand why. Hopefully she will be honest with you, if not, again, would you want to be with someone that doesn't respect you enough to be honest?

    The don'ts.

    Your emotions are in high gear right now, so don't try to do things like follow her, or constantly call her, or try to get her friends to help you, or any possilbe immature stunt to try and win her back. They don't work!! And later on, you will look back and think, boy was I being pathetic!! Trust me on this one, because I did it all, and I regret how stupid I was.

    Don't let her use you. At certain times she will feel that itch of feeling lonely, and wanting someone, and she may call upon you. Don't fall for it. Teenage girls are not emotionally mature, and will play games with you and your heart. And once she realizes that she got what she wanted, it will be buh bye for you again, only to leave you hurt once again. So stay strong, and don't give in to that urge, and the thought of the possibility.

    Don't try to date another girl to either make her jealous, or to help you get over her, that doesn't work either. Oh she may feel a twinge of jealousy, and might ask you guys to get together, but again, that is just an emotional game for her. And for you, it won't help heal your wound any faster, and in the process you can hurt the girl you are using.

    So basically, just give yourself some time to get through all the emotions. Start to go out with your friends, and meet new people, without trying to meet that someone special, at least for now. Enjoy being single, have fun, and one day, love will find you again.

    If you happen to look to music for inspiration during certain times in your life, keep listening to "Goodbye" by Gravity Kills, that will put you into a strong break-up mode.

    Good luck, stay strong, and don't worry, you will find that true special girl.

    And I'm giving you rep for having the courage to share your feelings, not many would. Believe it or not, but women really do appreciate guys that can share their feelings, because it shows that you are strong, and confident in yourself.
    Last edited by Diane; 03-09-2008 at 05:34 PM.

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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Quote Originally Posted by DGs_Diane View Post
    Ahhhh teenage love, oh how I remember that so well. My high school love and I were together for almost 5 years, and during that time we only got into 1, yes only 1 fight. Everybody thought that we were the perfect couple. We were talking about getting engaged, we were looking at rings, when BAM, he met this bitch that worked by him, and that was all she wrote. I was devastated, I couldn't eat, sleep, and I cried constantly. And what made it worse, is that he would not be honest with me, and come out and tell me that he met someone else, to which 6 months later he proposed to her, 4 months later they were married, and 1 month later she was pregnant. Talk about rubbing salt into my wound!

    I know that everyone says this, and they say it because it's true, but time does heal all wounds. It took some time for me to get over him, but I did, I allowed myself time to get through the emotional stuff, and then slowly but surely, I started to go out with my friends, and tried to meet new people.

    You said that this is her last year of school, I know that a lot of girls, and guys, start to get that itch of freedom in their senior year, and feel like they just don't want to be tied down to just one person. If she is going off to college, that can play a major roll in her decision as well.

    I have to ask you, does she seem as heartbroken as you? If not, then that right there should tell you that her feelings weren't as deep as yours. And if that is the case, would you really want to get back with someone that doesn't love you? If after a year, she doesn't love you the same way as you do her, the chances are, she never will, and if you were able to get back with her, more than likely the result will be the same, only this time you will be even more heartbroken than the first time.

    My advice to you - move on. You are only 19, and you have the best years ahead of you, so why would you want to be tied down, when you should be out having fun with your friends, and trying to meet new people? You should be taking the time to do things in your life that will help you grow as a person. Whether that is continuing your education, travel, participating in sports, or just going out and having fun with your friends. Just live life!!!!

    Trust me, you will find that one person who loves you for your heart one day, but until then, don't let this girl continue to hold you back from enjoying your life. It is obvious that you have a great heart, otherwise you would not be feeling this way, and as a woman, I respect that you, and the other guys here, are sharing your feelings so publicly, not many guys would, so I commend you guys for being so open.

    The biggest hurdle for you right now, is understanding the why, especially since it seems that she really hasn't given enough of a reason. When it happened to me, that was the hardest part to deal with, not knowing why. So, I would ask her to please at least have enough respect for you, and for what you shared for a year, to be honest with you about her reasons. Tell her that you respect her wanting to break-up, but you just want to be able to understand why. Hopefully she will be honest with you, if not, again, would you want to be with someone that doesn't respect you enough to be honest?

    The don'ts.

    Your emotions are in high gear right now, so don't try to do things like follow her, or constantly call her, or try to get her friends to help you, or any possilbe immature stunt to try and win her back. They don't work!! And later on, you will look back and think, boy was I being pathetic!! Trust me on this one, because I did it all, and I regret how stupid I was.

    Don't let her use you. At certain times she will feel that itch of feeling lonely, and wanting someone, and she may call upon you. Don't fall for it. Teenage girls are not emotionally mature, and will play games with you and your heart. And once she realizes that she got what she wanted, it will be buh bye for you again, only to leave you hurt once again. So stay strong, and don't give in to that urge, and the thought of the possibility.

    Don't try to date another girl to either make her jealous, or to help you get over her, that doesn't work either. Oh she may feel a twinge of jealousy, and might ask you guys to get together, but again, that is just an emotional game for her. And for you, it won't help heal your wound any faster, and in the process you can hurt the girl you are using.

    So basically, just give yourself some time to get through all the emotions. Start to go out with your friends, and meet new people, without trying to meet that someone special, at least for now. Enjoy being single, have fun, and one day, love will find you again.

    If you happen to look to music for inspiration during certain times in your life, keep listening to "Goodbye" by Gravity Kills, that will put you into a strong break-up mode.

    Good luck, stay strong, and don't worry, you will find that true special girl.

    And I'm giving you rep for having the courage to share your feelings, not many would. Believe it or not, but women really do appreciate guys that can share their feelings, because it shows that you are strong, and confident in yourself.
    Shes not the kind of girl who doesnt want to be tied down because she wants other guys, it just seems like shes been so busy that she didnt think she had time for the relationship as she wants to do good at school. Yes she was upset, she was bawling her eyes out over the phone to the point she could barely talk. It seemed to me like she loved me but was ending it on different reasons. Im comfortable with my feelings coz yes im a man but im not one that it usually rocked hard by just anything. Like ive said, ive been to many funerals and have never shed a tear. So its not like i breakdown just for anything, love does that to you i guess. Im gonna wait it out and see if she cracks first. Being the nice guy i am...i cant guarentee if she rings up and needs to talk about an issue that is non relating to our relationship that im not gonna comfort her. I told her on the phone that all though the relationship is over, i still care for her and if she needs me then im only a phone call away.


    I know your all saying hes only 19...but im very mature for my age. Im the only guy my age that i know at the moment with a full time job, im very picky with women which is why this has hit me so hard. Had it been a 3month relationship then i wouldnt give a shit but...yeah.
    Last edited by Snakey; 03-09-2008 at 07:02 PM.
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    Default Re: Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

    Snakey mate, when I was 17 I was working full time on building sites and paying 100% to support myself... what's my point?

    I'm immature as fuck... that's my point!...

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