As kids, we began to learn the letters of the English alphabet as...
A for apple, B for boy, C for cat, D for dog, etc...

HERE, plenty of signs that we're getting old:

A is for arthritis,
B is for bad back,
C is for chest pains, perhaps cardiac.
D is for dental decay and decline,
E is eyesight, can't read the top line.
F is for fissures and fluid retention,
G is for gas, which I'd rather not mention.
H is high blood pressure -- better if low,
I's for incisions with scars you can show.
J is for joints, very painful, won't mend,
K is for knees that crack when you bend.
L's for libido, what happened to sex,
M is for memory, I forgot what comes next.
N is for nausea, it makes you feel low,
O is for osteo, bones that don't grow.
P's for prescriptions, I have quite a few,
Q is for queasy, it might be bird flu,
R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears,
T is for tinnitus, there are bells in my ears.
U is for urine, big troubles with flow,
V is for vertigo, dizzy you know.
W's for worry that is going around,
X is for x-ray and what might be found.
Y is for another year I'm left here behind,
Z is for zest I still have -- in my mind.