I tried to cook myself last night!

[Gandalf]

It seems I have been cunningly decieved. My wife didn't rip up our marriage documents. They were in a file along with other documents and apparently she just ripped up an old work contract. Anyway we have started talking and it seems we have a tentative truce. If the documents had been ripped up there wouldn't have been a truce as I think that is a step too far. I think hiding my shoes and hitting me is a step too far, but she has said sorry for doing that. I am not a vengeful man, so will let it all slide....until the next time....

[Memphis]

Mate you need to get in the ask the trainer forum and pick up some counterpunching tips.

One jolting right hand in the gob and your troubles will be over, she'll probably thank you for it

[superheavyrhun]

Mate you need to get in the ask the trainer forum and pick up some counterpunching tips.

One jolting right hand in the gob and your troubles will be over, she'll probably thank you for it

Surely bottling it up for 20 years and going on a rampage would be a better solution?

Seriously though miles (relationship advice from single person.....but one who reads Dear Deirdre every day!), her apologising and just forgetting about it without dealing with the root cause isn't a permanent solution.

[Gandalf]

Mate you need to get in the ask the trainer forum and pick up some counterpunching tips.

One jolting right hand in the gob and your troubles will be over, she'll probably thank you for it

Surely bottling it up for 20 years and going on a rampage would be a better solution?

Seriously though miles (relationship advice from single person.....but one who reads Dear Deirdre every day!), her apologising and just forgetting about it without dealing with the root cause isn't a permanent solution.

I think so too, but the good thing in this instance is that rather than defend what she has done, she has held her hands up and said that she has acted like a dick. Usually you challenge her and she will try to justify it with "but you made me do it", but this time she hasn't. There was no reason to get angry the first time as the file I downloaded was fine and downloading it on the new computer has proven it. And the last time out she knows she should have been a little more patient and just let me have my dinner. There is no way for her to defend herself. "You made me do it, you should have eaten your dinner quicker!" just sounds bizarre, so she knows she can't say that. And how can you defend hiding someones shoes and then locking them out with nowhere to go. She now feels bad about it and so she should.

The good thing is that she didn't lose her mind completely and tear up the marriage documents. Like I say and have said before, that would be unforgiveable and would have been an act of war. I wouldn't sign a peace treaty after that (talking relationships here Bilbo...just using war as a metaphor....not quite actual politics). She knows she is completely in the wrong and I think 'might' have learned something from this.

One thing about this culture that really pisses me off is the belief that it is okay to get in someones face and yell at them whilst punching them on the arm. It is not okay and is part of a larger process of violent forces which are at work. I teach middle school kids and they are incredibly violent with one another. Sure, you can have a rough and tumble in our own countries, but these kids are brutal and this is betwen friends. Violence is ingrained. Corporal punishment has recently been outlawed, but is still widely practiced and goes quite beyond a tap with a stick. The idea that violence is a way of getting what you want permeates the mind from a young age. I think that this all feeds into an adult culture where screaming and punching is seen as a way to get what you want too. And as I have said, you see this all through the television that they show too. You cannot escape it. You even get it in parliament with the politicians getting into brawls. It is quite bizarre. How can you expect anything better from your general population?

You want miles to stay home, then you must scream at him and hit him. He will stay home! Of course, I will do quite the opposite. My wife lost the plot, tried something that her culture quite readily accepts and now realises that the method of control is quite useless. I won't hit back and I won't stay home. Maybe next time she will use the kitchen knife. Something new to keep things interesting!

[boozeboxer]

I like how you switch to third person back and forth.


You may not even have a wife.

[Gandalf]

I like how you switch to third person back and forth.


You may not even have a wife.

I used it more to emphasise it being from the wifes perspective. I would use 'I' to reflect my own specific viewpoints. I am not Ricky Hatton...

[boozeboxer]

I like how you switch to third person back and forth.


You may not even have a wife.

I used it more to emphasise it being from the wifes perspective. I would use 'I' to reflect my own specific viewpoints. I am not Ricky Hatton...

I do grasp the English language.