I don't think you are being selfish. Okay, you have become more involved than perhaps you would have liked to, but at the same time you were giving more of that time to this patient than the family did themselves. In Asia people don't just shunt their parents into old folks homes. They take them in and care for them. You were doing a job that was more of the later kind and that deserves respect, and more so from family members who shunt away family members that they just can't be bothered with anymore. Oh, but now they are dead it is "family time". I'm not so sure what that means.

You do a job and you do it as well as you can. As a pro you just have to grin and bear it really. Just one of them things.