Happy Birthday Bilbo

[El Kabong]

Happy birthday @Kev you odd little hobbit. Of course Kev is still on his hiatus, but if any of you have questions to ask of the strange little bastard and how he is doing I will gladly answer for him. Feel free to overload his inbox & mention him & give him as much negative rep as you like.

[ryanman]

Did he say when he was coming back?
I missed him leaving (and becoming 'Kev'!)

[El Kabong]

His goals were to land the infamous L (whom you might recall is the woman of his dreams), become a "PUA" and get a job. Once he achieves these things he has promised to return in his own words "insufferably triumphant".

I have informed Kev about @Gandalf & @Mark TKO meeting up and Kev was rather disheartened and thought miles seems like a fraud. He may have become disillusioned with miles whom he regarded as the only other forum member as open about his life as himself.


....well this should draw some replies

[Memphis]

Oh please can I forward a question to Bilbo? Can I....huh...huh!!

Prick. Wanker wants some birthday wishes log on for fucks sake.

[El Kabong]

Well Memphis I was doing this for exactly that reason, so the older forum members could give Bilbo hell for having left us. He doesn't "want" birthday wishes, I just figured it would be a funny thread & today is his birthday. So give him hell!

[Beanz]

Happy Birthday you lovely, adorable,well rounded person . You are so smashing that everyone on here is wailing and gnashing their teeth due to your absence. Have a really nice day and try not to hump too many table legs, you'll get splinters. I was going to buy your some pruning shears for the shrubbery growing out of your arse but figured that it was a lifestyle choice, so didn't. Have a good one.

[superheavyrhun]

Has Bilbo found the ring yet? Is it his eleventy first birthday? Get him some clippers to trim his feet.

[Dia bando]

Miles and Kev meet, Miles all things Korean, Kev all things lady-boys

[Memphis]

How long has he been away and still no job? Bloody Poles, coming over here...

I had to Google PUA. How do you know when you've become one? Is there a badge system like Scouts?

Single mum badge, chubby badge.

[El Kabong]

Bilbo has claimed to have had recent successes with women although if you might remember he had shacked up with a woman who bore a resemblance to one Morgan Freeman earlier this year. Success is a very nebulous word in this case, because "having sex" could have been the end goal and therefore Mrs. Morgan Freeman would count as a "success" but if the goal was to woo beautiful women then in that case he failed big time. Since then he has broken it off with his hairdresser and is on the prowl for other women.....I assume ones with self esteem as low as their morals.

[Dia bando]

Morals Lyle, what morals has Bilbo got very low ones,

[superheavyrhun]

Bilbo has claimed to have had recent successes with women although if you might remember he had shacked up with a woman who bore a resemblance to one Morgan Freeman earlier this year. Success is a very nebulous word in this case, because "having sex" could have been the end goal and therefore Mrs. Morgan Freeman would count as a "success" but if the goal was to woo beautiful women then in that case he failed big time. Since then he has broken it off with his hairdresser and is on the prowl for other women.....I assume ones with self esteem as low as their morals.

My concern is that Bilbo is the kind of guy for whom the chat up line: "Get your coat, I've got a knife" is the height of courtesy, and he tends to go out looking for women with rohypnol and duck tape in his pockets.

[Howlin Mad Missy]

I'm kinda hoping he's died

[El Kabong]

I'm kinda hoping he's died

.....damn that's cold blooded even for you

[Howlin Mad Missy]

I'm kinda hoping he's died

.....damn that's cold blooded even for you

where's my cool click?