Writing a Resume

[Von Milash]

anyone have a really good resume, or a really good template?

I can't get a f'in job for the life of me. I don't know if I'm overqualified, underqualified, my resume sucks, or what. but shit, out of work since August.

I uploaded it to theladders.com, a 100k-plus job site since all the normal sites have given me jack shit (I am rather educated wth almost two masters degree -msc and mba) and their free feedback expert said basically it sucks, but to fix it it would be $645. Yeah right. Fuck, why do i get the feelng that it doesn't matter what i would have submitted, it would have been shit.

So i re-did it based on his feedback, but im still waiting.

but i just applied a job in nyc... needed years of experience in science (chemistry) and an mba in finance. It's me to a "t." Got the fingers crossed. Plus it pays a shitload!

[Kev]

Good luck with the job application.

Just a thought but maybe your name is a little ridiculous and stops people taking you seriously.

When I picture a Von Milash, I picture a crazy German doctor from the late 1800's dressed in a top hat and tails, with a cane and a monocle.

By night he imports cadavars from the local graveyard and carries out electric shock treatment on them to Galvinise them back to life.

Why not drop the Von, so you no longer sound like you should be on a Nazi most wanted list and change Milash to an English or American generic name like Taylor, Brown or Smith?

[Von Milash]

good thought. ill give it a try.

amother thing that might not be working is that in my cover letter i say "if you don't hire me, then you're dumb fucking twat." Too strong?

[Kev]

good thought. ill give it a try.

amother thing that might not be working is that in my cover letter i say "if you don't hire me, then you're dumb fucking twat." Too strong?

Depends on the job but I'd tone it down a bit.

Why not play to your strengths. Make sure you state that English is your first language, that you are not in the country illegally and that you are not electronically tagged.

You could also show some photo's to demonstrate that your fingers bend and that you can toss a bun without dropping it.

With an application like that you'd be snapped up by most fast food outlets and maybe even get a place at McDonald's University

[donnydarkoIRL]

Hey Von.
Uh, Well I'm a student as such but I'm on work placement at the moment and had to prepare a pretty good resume.

A few brief tips.
1) Emphasise your ability to work as part of a team.
No matter how small the detail, try and big up that you like working with people.
2) Relate your "outside activities"
When or if you give details of your life outside work, relate it to work. I remember saying, "I participate in frequent excercise and competitive sports, this is an outlet for stress and alllows me to remain extremely focused and motivated whilst at work."
3) Be Human
You can have all the qualifications in the worlds and still be unemployable. Tray and represent your personality on the pages you present. You're a nice guy Von, make them like you. make them want to have you around.
4) Empahsise the work factor.
No matter what the job, make it clear you want to work in that area, even if you want to become an apple picker make it sound like thats your lifes ambition and you're willing to work to be there.

Anyway, they're only my opinions, you're older than me and therefore you've got more expierience in the world so tell me to get lost if you want.

However I do feel this was a good post as I wrote it all whilst holding back a dig at Bilbo posting on a work related thread
Just kidding Bilbo, You're the man and that was a low blow, I expect and accept that I'm about to have a tirrade of anti-Irish, anti-student posts directed my way over the next few years.

[Kev]

Hey Von.
Uh, Well I'm a student as such but I'm on work placement at the moment and had to prepare a pretty good resume.

A few brief tips.
1) Emphasise your ability to work as part of a team.
No matter how small the detail, try and big up that you like working with people.
2) Relate your "outside activities"
When or if you give details of your life outside work, relate it to work. I remember saying, "I participate in frequent excercise and competitive sports, this is an outlet for stress and alllows me to remain extremely focused and motivated whilst at work."
3) Be Human
You can have all the qualifications in the worlds and still be unemployable. Tray and represent your personality on the pages you present. You're a nice guy Von, make them like you. make them want to have you around.
4) Empahsise the work factor.
No matter what the job, make it clear you want to work in that area, even if you want to become an apple picker make it sound like thats your lifes ambition and you're willing to work to be there.

Anyway, they're only my opinions, you're older than me and therefore you've got more expierience in the world so tell me to get lost if you want.

However I do feel this was a good post as I wrote it all whilst holding back a dig at Bilbo posting on a work related thread
Just kidding Bilbo, You're the man and that was a low blow, I expect and accept that I'm about to have a tirrade of anti-Irish, anti-student posts directed my way over the next few years.

hahaha hehehe hahaha lol, no you are quite right, what the hell do I know. The last time I worked camera phones hadn't even been invented

[donnydarkoIRL]

Wanted to rep you but the system wouldn't let me, what can I say Bilbs you can dish it out, but you can really take it too! Class act

[Kev]

Wanted to rep you but the system wouldn't let me, what can I say Bilbs you can dish it out, but you can really take it too! Class act

If someone can't laugh at themselves they will have a very difficult life imo. You have to be able to roll with the punches.

I'll try and send some rep your way too buddy

[donnydarkoIRL]

There's you rep mate

[Von Milash]

Well that's just it, Hitman. I've done those things.... at least I THOUGHT I did...

My last resume got me 5 job ints. I went on three. I got three offers. So what gives now?

I was looking at books on the subject, and I see nothing in these supposed outstading resumes that mine doesn't incorporate. Im at a loss.

Fucking global financial markets meltdown.

[Kev]

Well that's just it, Hitman. I've done those things.... at least I THOUGHT I did...

My last resume got me 5 job ints. I went on three. I got three offers. So what gives now?

I was looking at books on the subject, and I see nothing in these supposed outstading resumes that mine doesn't incorporate. Im at a loss.

Fucking global financial markets meltdown.

Ok so it seems that your resume is ok but your interviews are letting you down.

Just a few points to consider.

1. Are you smelly?

2. Are you physically repulsive? Remember if your are morbidly obese the only jobs open to you are taxi driver and night time security guard.

3. Do you have ridiculous mutton chop sideburns? With a name like Von Milash I'm guessing this could be your problem?

[Steelie]

Well that's just it, Hitman. I've done those things.... at least I THOUGHT I did...

My last resume got me 5 job ints. I went on three. I got three offers. So what gives now?

I was looking at books on the subject, and I see nothing in these supposed outstading resumes that mine doesn't incorporate. Im at a loss.

Fucking global financial markets meltdown.

Have no fear, Steelies here

As a (talented) recruiter of 7 years standing, I would advise the following:

1. Quality over quantity - do a little research and take the time to tailor your CVs. It's a ballache to do, I know but generic CVs stand out a mile (in all the wrong ways).

Check the companys website or speak to Human Resources (more on these later) for the job spec and match your resume as close as you can. When recruiting in volume (and your sifting hundreds of CVs) the smallest omission can get you binned. Don't get bypassed simply because you forgot to include something. I've seen tons of ggod CVs go that way as you have to be ruthless or it'd take forever.

2. Ring the company directly...even speak to people in the department your interested in for information on the role. If you think that's too forward, ring the Reception or Customer Services and get the e-mail address for the the guys who are hiring. Tell them you are considering applying for the position and you would like to find out more at this stage (worst case scenario is that they'll bounce you to HR - in the best case scenarios I've had companies invite candidates in - and I can't even tell you how much of an edge that gives them...)

Actually, I'd put this right at the top of my list - it shows considerable initiative - whatsmore, if you get a reply to your e-mail or enquiry, thank them and tell them your applying and that you've sent your resume in...they'll look out for you, I promise...it's human nature.

2. We've already done 2

3. Build some bridges with HR. These guys generally won't spend that much time with you on the job spec etc (more than likely they'll post you something - it's usually just one of many they're recruiting for). All your looking for here really is a name and the opportunity to get your name in thier head (it can be as simple as speaking to them and getting thier e-mail address - and then highlighting in your e-mail with your resume that you just spoke).

4. Job websites are trawled by recruiters everyday but it pays to ensure your on ones that are relative to your field - particularly if your a specialist of some sort. Also consider signing up with a specialist agency directly (I'd suggest ringing you new HR friends and asking who they use...)

In short, there are ways to be more pro-active and take control of the situation. Simply changing your resume may help (after all, it could be shit ) but waiting for the work to come to you is leaving it to chance...and that's a waste of your time isn't it?

[No Contest]

If your able to apply in person I think that improves your chances, its alot easier to reject a unseen person than someone right there in your face. At least you will get a idea if they are interested, showing up in person shows your eager.

[donnydarkoIRL]

The downturn is making it significantly more difficult to obtain jobs at the moment, particularly in positions partly or entirely financed by Public funds. I guess as a result jobs affected or reliant on economic conditions will be suffering too.

But with a bit of patience the right one will come, hope it works out Von.