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Thread: Any good jokes ????

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  1. #196
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Let me know when the good jokes show up.

    Need a good laugh.

  2. #197
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    My son asked me, what's a conservative so I stole all his toy's, and gave them to the rich family next-door.

  3. #198
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    How do Australasians, like there steaks like there Gold Medals rare.

  4. #199
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by Dia bando View Post
    My son asked me, what's a conservative so I stole all his toy's, and gave them to the rich family next-door.
    That is half the story, you also would join that family as a non-director when you retire and live off their fat profits.
    Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Just been watching the ladies beach volleyball and there has already been
    a bad wrist injury,i should be ok by the morning.

  6. #201
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by Dia bando View Post
    How do Australasians, like there steaks like there Gold Medals rare.
    Brings new meaning to Bronzed Aussies .
    Hidden Content " border="0" />

    I can explain it.
    But I cant understand it for you.

  7. #202
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide.
    The librarian says; "F*** off, you won't bring it back."
    Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.

  8. #203
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Anal sex, is like your first car your Dad gives it you, but you don't really want it.

  9. #204
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    A man phone's up, work Talking to his boss I can't come into work I'm sick, the boss how sick are you
    the answer I'm in bed with the daughter.

  10. #205
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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Quote Originally Posted by roberto duran legend View Post
    Just been watching the ladies beach volleyball and there has already been
    a bad wrist injury,i should be ok by the morning.
    Told my parents that yesterday they fell about.
    They are in their 80's, both south Londoners.

    My mum says: theres this older couple who go out to their favorite restaurant and while there, a young stunning woman comes up and pashes her husband ruffs his hair up smiles and walks off to the bar.
    The wife asks whats that all about!? and the husband says "Oh well I may as well let you know that is my mistress".
    The wife says its over and shes leaving him. And he says fair enough, but there wont be any more nights out in restaurants , no more diamond necklaces or holidays in the Caribbean. Just then his best mate walks in the door with a young bird under his arm. His wife looks at them and says who the hell is that!" HEr husband says oh thats Petes mistress" His wife turns to him and says "she isnt as pretty as our one."
    Last edited by Andre; 08-17-2012 at 01:11 AM.
    Hidden Content " border="0" />

    I can explain it.
    But I cant understand it for you.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Bloke comes home from the pub rolling up the stairs, His wife is furious and says after 12 again, what would you do if one night you come back and Im here with another man? He looks at her out of one eye and says "I'd shoot his dog."
    Hidden Content " border="0" />

    I can explain it.
    But I cant understand it for you.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Robin Van Persies house has been burnt down.....The police suspect Arsene.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    A Jewish Dad and his son were sitting at the dinner table together. The son asks "Dad, can i borrow 40 Dollars?"
    The Dad replies "30 Dollars!!!, what the hell you need 20 Dollars for?!?!?!"
    You are the Creator of all that is, all that was, and all there ever will be.....

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    When Susan’s boyfriend proposed, she says “I love the simple things in life but I do not want one of them for my husband”
    Do not let success go to your head and do not let failure get to your heart.

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    Default Re: Any good jokes ????

    Hidden Content " border="0" />

    I can explain it.
    But I cant understand it for you.

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