Hi all--new to the forum and still a novice boxer. I have a question that hopefully someone here might be able to shed light on. I boxed in college a little bit in my senior year (about four years ago) and had two fights, ending with a 1-1 record. The first fight was a murderous ass-beating from a guy a foot taller than me that ended in the first round (I fought back, though--it wasn't a total slaughter. I refused the eight-count twice and got pulled out eventually because I was bleeding too much). I won the second fight. Whenever I've sparred since, I've taken hard shots and fought back. My old coach said I had "the chin from hell." Nobody ever accused me of having a glass jaw or no heart. The problem was the nerves.
The nerves got to be so much after awhile that I had to quit. I kept having this fear that I would give out. Even after winning my second fight, as the referee raised my hand, I was filled with anxiety. "You got through this time," the voice inside seemed to say. "But you haven't really proven your tough. You've got to have a lot more fights before that happens."
A year or two later, I got diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder and started taking medication for it, so my anxiety tends to be better. I recently started sparring with a friend of mine again (ex-Golden Gloves champ whose been boxing since I was about three), and I still take heavy shots and spar myself bloody. But I've also still got the nerves. I worry that deep down inside I'm a huge wuss and that it'll be obvious to any real boxer I cross paths with.
I'm not sure if this is even an appropriate question to ask on these forums. I've talked to counselors, but they're by and large not really familiar with boxing. I guess I want to ask a court of other boxers if I'm just a coward who should find another sport or if this is a more common problem than I've been led to believe. Thanks, all.
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