Signs that you are getting older

[Master]

1. If you do not know any of the songs in the Top 40 -
2. You are against skimpy clothes
3. You lie to your kids to get them to behave
4. You have stopped going out and become a taxi driver for your kids
5. You get impatient
6. You sound slightly mad and talk to yourself
7. You spend more time at B&Q than HMV
8. You get annoyed at Christmas – why should santa get all the credit for buying the prsesnts when you have bought them.
9. You are thrifty with money but wife spends too much on shoes, bags and clothes
10. You turn off the heating and lights – if you are cold wear a jumper!

[Wayne]

Your child refuses to kiss you.
The cold makes your body ache.
Gray pubes.
Food that used to be gross is good to you now.
When you see laughing teenagers you become insecure and annoyed.

[Preme]

First sign is when you wake up in the night to take a piss after just having a few pints.

[Nameless]

you put sugar in your tea

When you prefer to stay at home on friday and saturday evening rather than going out

Sex once a week is ok

When you look at the date of release of your CD collection to realize that your best ones have been bought 15 years ago and you never realized it till now.

[SlimTrae]

When you look at the date of release of your CD collection to realize that your best ones have been bought 15 years ago and you never realized it till now.

.what about casette tapes?

[Master]

When you look at the date of release of your CD collection to realize that your best ones have been bought 15 years ago and you never realized it till now.

.what about casette tapes?

I have my LP's.

[CFH]

Your child refuses to kiss you.
The cold makes your body ache.
Gray pubes.
Food that used to be gross is good to you now.
When you see laughing teenagers you become insecure and annoyed.

[Cortez The Killer]

When i see things like this and I think "that's really true"

[Master]

Wearing trousers up to your chest
Wearing beige colours more.

[Nameless]

- When you consider buying a Buick car.

- To quote Billy Bragg : "when the girls you used to love at school are all pushing Pram".

- When you now consider the music you used to like as noise.

- When you are spending your days sitting at the Mall and criticizing people that passes by.

- When you start to over- use the expression "In my time".

- When your stare at the tits of a girl till you realize she's your best friend's daughter.

- When the hair in your nose and your ears start to look like the rain forest.

- When you consider a subscription to a line dancing club.

- When a medical visit to the doctor becomes something mandatory more than once a year.

- When you start to buy pastel shirts.

- When you solely consider going to Florida for winter.

[Snakey]

When i see things like this and I think "that's really true"

I guess im going to jail coz those chicks are fuckin hot

[Howlin Mad Missy]

When i see things like this and I think "that's really true"

I guess im going to jail coz those chicks are fuckin hot

don't need to worry about chicks in jail...unless some big dude calls you chick.

[The Congressman]

When you can no longer experience a wet dream.

[lamble39]

When you make a groaning noise when you bend down or stand up!
When you ignore The Simpsons to watch the news.
When the print in the Daily Mirror isn't big enough!

[Andre]

When you simply realize that you are finally at peace with yourself and also others;
Mainly because you dont give afuk anymore about what others think about your look or what you think;so you lose the extra baggage you used to haul around like correct clothes ,correct manners,looking great, incorrect thought patterns concerning what others think, collecting bulshit,like material objects that eventually wear out.

The richest man is the one who knows he has enough.