Couldn't Stop Laughing

[Youngblood]

Ever have one of those times you know yer probably not supposed to be laughing, but just can't help it or stop?

Had 2 friends sleep over Saturday night, just chillin', playing video games and so on, when we take a break to eat a pizza his mom sent for us, right. My bud is leaning back in the chair as he's eating when he loses his balance. He almost falls over on his back on the kitchen chair, when he tries to correct it by throwing his weight forward, real fast like. Chair smacks the floor real hard, but moreso, exactly on top of his two big toes. Reflex causes him to yank his toes out as fast as the chair legs smashed on his toes, and he screams this really high loud wail! Like "AIIIIIEEEEEE"

WTF?!?!

We are looking at him still trying to figure out what just happened, and he is quickly ripping his socks off, and the blood is now spreading.

WTFF?!?!

He says, "Look quick!" Yelling. "What do you see? What do you see?" I look into his socks and there just like brand new are 2 big toe nails, ripped right off. They looked like some kinda novelty store fake toe nails or something, and I started to laugh, and my other friend picks one up and starts to laugh. And this poor guy is sitting there practically in shock, just got his big toe nails ripped the hell off, and us 2 idiots are sitting there and can't stop laughing.

"Call my mom! Call my mom!" he says. ANd I'm trying to call his mom up to tell her but can barely dial cuz i'm laughing so hard. Finally get thru and am trying to tell her to come get her kid with the ripped off toe nails and bloody stumps, and she thinks we are pranking her cuz me and my other buddy can barely breath we're laughing so hard. Had to give the phone to him to convince her it was true.

She showed up and still thought we were full of shit until she saw it, cuz all you could hear from the moment she walked in our house, was us two rolling on the floor laughing at our buddy with the ripped off toe nails. haha

Meh, she kept saying "what is wrong with you's" and was very annoyed helping him out the door, both of us still unable to barely stand. Even our friend with the now nail-less toes was laughing at us and calling us assholes as he hobbled out, I think maybe more cuz he was now in shock and gettin light-headed from the pain. LOL

Yea, I feel like an asshole for laughing so hard and being purdy much useless to help my hurt buddy, but meh...for some reason, it was just funny and even now when I think of it away from the nervous laughter, it is still making me LOL.

Ever have something like that happen?

[Sharla]

I know you'd feel bad for laughing but that's such a one off ridiculous accident I don't blame you - i mean not just one but BOTH toe nails when he was originally trying not to hit his HEAD! You couldn't do that deliberately!

[Youngblood]

lol thanks Sharla. I feel a little less evil now. I'm gonna see if I can get some pics of them today. haha

[Kev]

Don't feel bad mate. The funniest thing I ever saw was cruel as well and I still chuckle thinking about it.

It happened about 16 years ago when me and a load of school friends were around my mates house. He lived with his dad and sister and his sister had a little boy about 3 years old.

Anyway we were in my mates bedroom and little Jamie (he's now 19) was trying to get in. He was pushing on the door and he would push real hard, then step back and run at the door.

My mate Wayne played a mean trick on him and opened the door timing it so his poor little nephew would run through and fall over.

Well he did run through, but he didn't stop running, he actually sprinted into and across the room and knocked himself out on the radiator.

I was in absolute hysterics

[donnydarkoIRL]

I was in the gym one time and there was a small kid pushing at the door. They were those two way swinging doors, maybe seven feet in height and solid timber, so as you can imagine they were quite heavy. The kid was pushing and pushing, but just couldn't get the door open. From the other side a man pushes through the door and because of the 90 degree swing the kids goes literally flying across the room!

That wasn't funny in itself, but when the kid sprang to it's feet screaming; "Daddy, why you do that!" I couldn't resist.

[:::PSL:::]

lmfao!

[Canvasback]

When I was in the police academy we had to do role playing about a sex crime. There were only three women in the class and they had all dropped out by the time we did the role playing. Half the class went up to the front with the 2 female instructors while the rest of us waited and pretended we were the reporting officer of the incident. This guy, Mike, came back and pretended he was a woman who had met a guy in a bar and taken him home. The guy then forced her to have oral sex. When I asked him what happened he said, "I took the guy to my apartment and then he made me blow him." I started laughing so hard I was crying. We couldn't look at each other for the rest of the day without bursting out laughing. How we didn't get disciplined I'll never know. I'm laughing just thinking about it now and it was about 25 years ago.

[Diane]

I lost it during my older sisters wedding of all things.

Her and the a$$hole she was marrying, were just getting married by a judge. So it was just me, my boyfriend at the time, my younger sister, my mom, and my moms boyfriend. Well the judge was this tiny little old lady with these big bug eyes, and as she was about to perform the ceremony, she put on these coke bottle glasses that made her eyes really bug out, and I don't know why, but it gave me the giggles big time. I could not stop for anything, I kept trying to hide behind my boyfriend, so I couldn't see her, but it didn't work. Then because I couldn't stop, my mom ended up getting the giggles then too. Both of us were giggling and crying from the laughter throughout the whole ceremony. And that little old lady didn't skip a beat. I was so waiting for her to scold us.


Another time, me and my team mates from our coed softball team went to a sports bar to get some food after a tournament, and one of the guys on the team had his wife and 2 kids with him. Well him and his wife ordered some hot wings to share, and the wife had their 2 year old son on her lap, and we were all just talking. Well, without us noticing quickly enough the 2 year old grabbed one of the hot wings and got a bite off before the wife could grab it. All of us at the table just sat their quietly waiting to see the kids reaction when the hot sauce kicked in, and OMG I wish I had a camera at that moment, the look of sheer terror that was on his face, and how he reacted was priceless. I mean the kid had his mouth on fire, and every single one of us at the table just lost it. We all were laughing and crying forever.

[Youngblood]

hahaha. great stories. you're all assholes too. i feel much better now.

[Youngblood]

I had to find and bump this thread...because I still laugh and we still talk about the time he ripped off his toe nails. Add to that the fact the same friend drove into an opening truck door about a week ago on his bicycle...and well, yea. haaa

He is that one guy amongst all my friends that just crazy, stupid and painful shit seems to always happen to.

[Ben2611]

Ok me n 3 other friends usually get to soccer training half an hour early so we can just muck around and stuff, we were kicking the soccer ball around and i just kicked as hard as i could right into his nuts he was on the ground in pain for about 5 mins n i was pissing myself laughing the whole time. Then when he got over it we were throwing tennis balls as high as we could in there air so i threw it up about 25 meters and my friend is just standing there looking up with one hand out directly above his head thinking he's totally gonna catch it, but he doesn't the ball goes straight past his hand and smacks him in the nose and he was bleeding but i didnt know he was that badly hurt so i just sat down laughing then he came over and he's bleeding i was like felt so bad!

[Deanrw]

The worst I broke up was at the movie theater. I was with my girlfriend and her daughter at the time. We were watching the movie Deep Impact.


Well I found the movie corny and campy from the start. Everyone in the theater was practically grieving when watching the damn thing. At the point where the daughter and her estranged father were standing on the beach watching the gigantic tidal wave coming, well I started laughing and I just could not stop. I was roaring laughing and the more my girlfriend Karen looked at me with disgust, the harder I laughed until I was virtually in pain from laughter.

[CGM]

One time many years ago I was hitchiking in front of a motor inn somewhere in Alberta, it was quite late, I'd been there for hours, had a long ways to go, and I'm getting grumpy. Anyways, a car pulls into the parking lot, a couple gets out and heads for their room. Both dressed to the nines. They are obviously choked up about something, and she's riding his ass something fierce, which is the way it usually goes. A while later the door to their room opens up, he comes walking out, and sits quietly on the edge of the fountain with his feet in the water. She comes out a short while later, and she's still reaming him like crazy, just won't let up. So he gets up, walks to the center of the fountain, puts his hand on the spout, and directs a spray of water right at her, she and her fancy evening gown and her buffed up hair get totally soaked. It stops her cold, she shuts right up. The look of shock on her face was priceless. And I'm having a real good laugh. Made it worth the time I spent there.