Snakeys 1yr relationship ended and now hes gutted!

Hi guys needed to vent. Been going out with this great girl for over a yr and everything seemed to be fine until a couple of weeks ago. We had a couple of arguments and she tried to break up with me but reconsidered. Then today she dropped the bomb after a little argument...over the phone :( Snakey is now absolutely gutted, feels like i just when 50 rounds with a prime tyson. I loved her...i still do and she couldnt tell me very convincingly that she didnt love me.

Now guys cheer me up and give me advice on how to get her back coz i dont believe the shit she told me coz it sounded like a lie.

Snakey don't know ya well fella but this happened to me a couple months ago, it was completely out of the blue and I was stunned, and this may make me sound like a puss but its the first time I cried over a girl. Like she didn't even want to say it but I saw something was up so eventually she said it's over. I'm not sure how you can get her back, talk it out? See what the problem is, but the thing is if she's already been trying to break up with you so for some reason she just might not be happy in the relationship and she wants out...best thing I think that you can do is just let her go and try and move on, I know easier said than done...granted this is comming from a 22 year old who knows fuck all, but keep your head up man.

Well being a woman, maybe I can give you a female perspective.

So, in order for me to try and help, what was her reason for breaking up, and how old are the both of you?

If you don't want to say anything here in this thread, you can pm me the details if you like.

I am sorry Snakey. I hope you get better. Some snakes give birth to live young.

Sorry to hear about that man!! I've had a horrible breakup in the past and I just could barely eat or anything... It feels like half of your soul has been taken away and your just so empty...

If you really want to get her back, I can realllly realllly recommend that you have a listen to these things buy a guy named David Deangelo.. He's studied relationships and girls psychology and all sorts of things, a complete expert, and he's put together some really great programs about how to be the best sort of person that girls naturally want to be with..
I'm a bit of a broken record about recommending this stuff, but it's just absolutely huge! It's improved the relationship i'm in 10 fold. I can avoid all the things that turn my girlfriend off that have made her feel trapped and feel less attraction for me, and i've improved on all the area's that do make her feel attraction... And also the quality of the relationship has improved as we both feel we are getting everything we want out of the relationship, which is really the main part... There must be something that she feels she's not getting out of it, and this will help you recognize what it is and be able to give it to her,,,,, but also while making sure you don't have to give up your own happiness...
I posted the links in the sharing section, and his name is David Deangelo.. Their is one program called "Mastery" which is audio, and I think that may be one of the best programs for your situation,,, but also "On being a man who naturally attracts women" is also absolutley HUGE. You will instantly recognise what area's in yourself that may have contributed to your relationship deteriorating, and will realllllly help you to feel confident that you can get her back and that the whole relationship really can work into the future..

If you really do love her, it's not worth giving her up, and this will just give you a huge amount of internal resources to handle and take care of the situation...
Again, broken record, but the stuff is absolutely huge and I would love to see you fix the situation up and be fulfilled!

Im 19 this yr and i know your all thinking that your young and got plenty of time in your life. But is the first chick ive ever loved and i still do with all my heart. Im usually pretty good emotionally, ive never cried at a funeral. I havent cried since i was a young kid. But today....im fighting it, im fighting it hard but no matter how hard i try i cant stop from breaking into tears when i think about her. She couldnt give me a real reason to why it had to end. She even said that she loved me yesterday and for some reason today she doesnt. Shes been a bit depressed due to some friend issues so all i could think was that this is having an impact on her decision. I just feel like....im heart broken. I feel like my been hit by a wrecking ball that hit directly on my chest. I just wanna ring her up and say please can we sought this out. But my better judgement tells me to wait a week or two and then see if shes happy without me. I dont know what to do guys. I got work tomoz, i wanna go to keep my mind occupied but i know if i go my mind isnt going to be on the job.

snakey don't hold the tears back man, if ya feel like ya need to cry, cry man, I know it's not the "manliest" thing to do, but you'll feel better after you let it out. Also I'm one of the people like you who doesn't get overly emotional, but some things just get to ya , and a girl that you love is one of them man! I'm sorry I can't give ya more advice on how ya get her to stay with ya, since I couldn't get mine to stay with me, but diane being a girl might be able to give ya more tips as well as some of the older fellas on here. Just keep your head up and life will go on and get better again, even tho you may not think so at the moment.

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Originally Posted by armin

snakey don't hold the tears back man, if ya feel like ya need to cry, cry man, I know it's not the "manliest" thing to do, but you'll feel better after you let it out. Also I'm one of the people like you who doesn't get overly emotional, but some things just get to ya , and a girl that you love is one of them man! I'm sorry I can't give ya more advice on how ya get her to stay with ya, since I couldn't get mine to stay with me, but diane being a girl might be able to give ya more tips as well as some of the older fellas on here. Just keep your head up and life will go on and get better again, even tho you may not think so at the moment.

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Yeah, you know i went and hung out with a mate i hadnt seen in ages and it kind of helped. Then i got back home and it just hit me again. My natural action was to ring her, coz when i was pissed off or needed to talk i would talk to her. Now shes gone and you know i feel so fucking lonely.

Just hang in there buddy! You should maybe take the day off, go to the video store and just hire a bunch of movies and stay in bed all day watching them... Maybe catch up with some friends..

I broke up with my first love when I was about 18 as well after we'd been together 2 years.. I had persuid her for a year before that as well... Fuck I seriously felt like dying.. It's probably one of the worst feelings in the world.. One thing that helped was just hanging around with my friends which took my mind off it a little bit.. I barely ate for a few weeks though... It was horrible because I still had to see her around school.. I avoided her as much as possible, but it was pretty f'd... I was like an obsessed little puppy dog when I saw her in class or ever talked to her, I practically begged for her to see me again, which really didn't help and looking back now, it's probably the worst thing you can do.. But my instincts just said do anything you can to get her back...
On our graduation ball I followed her around all night after she offered to dance with me, then pretty much begger her to kiss me... That was the last time I really saw her and it eventually got easier... But NO part of it was actually very easy at all...
It sucks man! But know that a lot of us has been through it too and can support ya

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Originally Posted by Dizaster

Just hang in there buddy! You should maybe take the day off, go to the video store and just hire a bunch of movies and stay in bed all day watching them... Maybe catch up with some friends..

I broke up with my first love when I was about 18 as well after we'd been together 2 years.. I had persuid her for a year before that as well... Fuck I seriously felt like dying.. It's probably one of the worst feelings in the world.. One thing that helped was just hanging around with my friends which took my mind off it a little bit.. I barely ate for a few weeks though... It was horrible because I still had to see her around school.. I avoided her as much as possible, but it was pretty f'd... I was like an obsessed little puppy dog when I saw her in class or ever talked to her, I practically begged for her to see me again, which really didn't help and looking back now, it's probably the worst thing you can do.. But my instincts just said do anything you can to get her back...
On our graduation ball I followed her around all night after she offered to dance with me, then pretty much begger her to kiss me... That was the last time I really saw her and it eventually got easier... But NO part of it was actually very easy at all...
It sucks man! But know that a lot of us has been through it too and can support ya

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Yeah mate, i just want her back so bad. You dont know what you had till its gone. Trust me dude, the snake man is gonna use every little bit of charm hes got in him when he sees her in a week or two. Im gonna give her around two weeks and then im gonna ask to see her (as my bday is in two weeks). She said she would but as a friend. But im gonna see if i can pull her into old habits. You know put my arm around her and see what she does and maybe try a kiss and if she kisses me back then we are in business but if she pulls away and wants no part of it then im down shit creek without a paddle.

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Originally Posted by snakey

Yeah mate, i just want her back so bad. You dont know what you had till its gone. Trust me dude, the snake man is gonna use every little bit of charm hes got in him when he sees her in a week or two. Im gonna give her around two weeks and then im gonna ask to see her (as my bday is in two weeks). She said she would but as a friend. But im gonna see if i can pull her into old habits. You know put my arm around her and see what she does and maybe try a kiss and if she kisses me back then we are in business but if she pulls away and wants no part of it then im down shit creek without a paddle.

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Good luck mate.
But make it easy on your self, two weeks of false hopes could bring you right back to todays feelings.
Write to her or ring her.
Ask her if it is someone else for a start or maybe she wants to be free and see other guys?
If it is either of these you have been let off a major hook early on and you should move on ; if not, there is hope.

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Originally Posted by Andre

Good luck mate.
But make it easy on your self, two weeks of false hopes could bring you right back to todays feelings.
Write to her or ring her.
Ask her if it is someone else for a start or maybe she wants to be free and see other guys?
If it is either of these you have been let off a major hook early on and you should move on ; if not, there is hope.

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Nah i asked her before if there was someone else and she told me there wasnt. I think its coz its her last yr at school (ive been out of school for nearly two yrs) and i think shes feeling the pressure. I got the impression she was trying to say its too much and that its not working out at this present time.

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Originally Posted by snakey

Yeah mate, i just want her back so bad. You dont know what you had till its gone. Trust me dude, the snake man is gonna use every little bit of charm hes got in him when he sees her in a week or two. Im gonna give her around two weeks and then im gonna ask to see her (as my bday is in two weeks). She said she would but as a friend. But im gonna see if i can pull her into old habits. You know put my arm around her and see what she does and maybe try a kiss and if she kisses me back then we are in business but if she pulls away and wants no part of it then im down shit creek without a paddle.

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Snakey mate, that's not the way to go about things... Dunno how old you are but I'm guessing you're young based off that.

You need to talk over the problems that you had, get some closure/reasons etc... if you're going to have a real relationship then it's not just a case of trying to get off with her again.

You're not on steady foundations. Loads of couples take time out from each other.

Fantanas Guide to dealing with Heart Break

A HMHT has experienced pretty much all that life has to offer including the delights of being able to talk with moderately attractive women without them throwing up. Heart Break is one of those things which can make even the most rugged real man, such as myself, loose his way. The reason Hearts Break is scientifically proven to be related to dehydration, lack of sexy time and your lovers mother. You can take care of the first two by drinking more fluoride free water and buying some new white socks (or for the smaller member getting free white socks from megabowl). The third one however is just one of those things which cannot be changed, like annoying Welsh people. Rather than stewing in your own mess all alone just follow this effective guide to make sure you can deal with something almost as painful as blue ball syndrome.

4 Simple Steps to kicking Cupids Ass

1)The last thing you need is to be constantly reminded of that girl you were physical with, sexually I mean. Get rid of anything that will remind you of her. Photos, clothes or used rubber you left lying on the floor to show off to friends. All of these things need to be put somewhere like in your collection of old girlfriends shit or disposed off, perhaps clinically. Out of sight, out of mind. Just use the same thing you had to do when you couldn’t drop off your little soldiers in a timely fashion when with her, think of other girls.
2)HMHTs are like tigers, strong, muscular and menacing but never ginger. Ever. Like tigers HMHTs can not stand to be caged, unless of course it is with a hot women who is on heat. What you need to do is go out, explore the land and have a lot of fun, in a non gay way. Make plans for every single day but remember to work them around your bowls of coco pops with manwhiches. You may have other less important commitments like work or funerals, don’t neglect them completely, but don’t engulf yourself in them because that would be hiding the problem like you would hide a flesh wound in a gun fight. Or fat in a shirts off showdown. You need to deal with this head on and take it violently from behind, no pun intended.
3)Surround yourself with people, other HMHTs would be ideal. However, standard humans will do. You will constantly be reminded how much better you are than them and this will of course make you feel much better. You can laugh at their short comings and point them out to raise your own status. It is ok to let these dip-shits know you are hurting inside, in a non gay way, as it will make you appear slightly vulnerable and they will offer to buy you things. If it stops working start acting more Heart Broken, maybe put on a loose fitting top rather than a muscle clinger.
4)Something done over again and again will create a habit or an anchor. An anchor is something which for example when you are feeling low and you hear a song enough times while in that low state will trigger an emotion. The next time you hear that song even if you are happy you will be put into a low state again. Don’t allow this to happen because you don’t want to be in the middle of a Shirts off Showdown with an arch rival and “Akon – It don’t matter comes” on and your routine falls apart. Habits are done over and over again and can become part of your everyday life. Humans have many habits which when observed from the superior perspective of a HMHT seem utterly insane or pointless. It creates for them a comfort zone they don’t want to be removed from. Make sure whatever your habits are they are positive and inline with what a HMHT should be doing like picking on Galiens but never making bare skin contact with them.

Final Thoughts

A Broken Heart may take a long time to heal, even longer than your relationship lasted, so we are dealing with perhaps 2 and half weeks. It is important to stick to the guide and not drift away in a blaze of horniness desperation. If you feel physically sick a couple of tablespoons of Calpol will help. Make sure you get an adult to open the lid for you as those bastards are tricky. A Broken Heart needs fixing all alone, other women will not do this for you. I mean how could they, they are there for entertainment and not for self improvement. You will need to work on yourself and not use or rely on others to do this for you. You’re a HMHT for fucks sake, you’re capable of putting together even the trickiest of self assembly furniture. This means dealing with a Broken Heart is a walk in the park, late on a Friday night looking for a lady named Vixen. Heart Break will happen because as a HMHT, such as myself, you wear your heart on your sleeve. The first time will always be the hardest to deal with due to inexperience. The other times maybe harder, no pun intended, but easier to get through as you know where to go, no pun intended.

Yours in manliness,

Fantana

To turn this around mate you are 19 it was one year out of your life, i know it sounds hard but this could have dragged on for years and messed up your life rather than just a year... i know it dosnt feel good to hear this but its better this happened now than later.

hell your already back with your mates who you aint seen in ages and i'm guessing that is because of this relationship so....

my advice is to get out there and fuck everything till your cock drops off... your 19 FFS you wont get these years back and will have plenty of time to fall in love later mate.

life a cunt somtimes but you have had a lucky escape you just dont relise it yet ;)

keep your chin up mate ;)