Does God have a purpose for your penis?
They say that God has a purpose for his creations, this is confirmed every-time you get a stiff one, fact!
Seriously, I was talking to a christian friend of mine a few weeks back who said he felt guilty when he masturbated. (but apparently couldn't help himself) Because the "sex" wasn't with his wife, and therefore God wouldn't approve of it. (I'm not making this up)
I don't know if he listened, but I told him that it was his tallywacker , not "God's" and he could do anything he damn well pleased with it, including jacking-off 10 times a day, without feeling any "guilt".
Thoughts?
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
X
Amazing, it would be even better if the penis grew back bigger each time.
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Tell him not to worry just stay in control. Instead of ancient scripture being read as warnings and guidelines as they were intended, so that people would be heartfelt beings instead of heartless beings and lost in the mind and mental world.
People (Rome) changed the structure in scriptures to mean rules and punishments combined so that the group involved is put under control to not mix their genes up with others and so could remain pure blooded and out grow other groups by not cross breeding. It was planned by Men, look at the two religions with the most children and the most income = the most Earthly power. They also demonized women in each of their religions and the Ying or Female energy of God and took 'Made in His own image' (Creator male image, male Yang energy) to mean that only Male is all of God.
That is repressive judgmental and the false image worshiped in both the two major religions.How could God get the bodies design wrong so that these men make a rule to remove their womens clitorises? :mad: Control again.
Both are man induced fallacies to keep people judgmental and trapped mentally away from real love God energy, God isnt a male only being, isnt just male energy, God is all things microscopic and macro-cosmic.
Why would all of everything bigger than a million universes expanding be concerned with your dick?
What is the concern is that you will live for your dick and become mentally attached to the habitual side of life and blow all your life energy on it totally.
That is consequential, not punishable.
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Andre
Tell him not to worry just stay in control. Instead of ancient scripture being read as warnings and guidelines as they were intended, so that people would be heartfelt beings instead of heartless beings and lost in the mind and mental world.
People (Rome) changed the structure in scriptures to mean rules and punishments combined so that the group involved is put under control to not mix their genes up with others and so could remain pure blooded and out grow other groups by not cross breeding. It was planned by Men, look at the two religions with the most children and the most income = the most Earthly power. They also demonized women in each of their religions and the Ying or Female energy of God and took 'Made in His own image' (Creator male image, male Yang energy) to mean that only Male is all of God.
That is repressive judgmental and the false image worshiped in both the two major religions.How could God get the bodies design wrong so that these men make a rule to remove their womens clitorises? :mad: Control again.
Both are man induced fallacies to keep people judgmental and trapped mentally away from real love God energy, God isnt a male only being, isnt just male energy, God is all things microscopic and macro-cosmic.
Why would all of everything bigger than a million universes expanding be concerned with your dick?
What is the concern is that you will live for your dick and become mentally attached to the habitual side of life and blow all your life energy on it totally.
That is consequential, not punishable.
I often refer to the holy babble, as the old and new testicle, because it's almost entirely about "men", women in the bible, especially the OT, are pretty much treated like chattel, personal property, and/or breeding livestock.
P.S. What God doesn't seem to understand is a man's penis has a mind of it's own, you may be absolute ruler of the universe, but you have no control over what my dick does. ;)
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mars_ax
They say that God has a purpose for his creations, this is confirmed every-time you get a stiff one, fact!
Seriously, I was talking to a christian friend of mine a few weeks back who said he felt guilty when he masturbated. (but apparently couldn't help himself) Because the "sex" wasn't with his wife, and therefore God wouldn't approve of it. (I'm not making this up)
I don't know if he listened, but I told him that it was his tallywacker , not "God's" and he could do anything he damn well pleased with it, including jacking-off 10 times a day, without feeling any "guilt".
Thoughts?
It is strange that a omnipotent God should create a body so imperfect for the roles he wished it to fulfil. The Talmudic tradition of referring to spilled seed as the murder of unborn generations and the creation of demons has at it's heart the story of Onan. He was the son of Judah and when his brother Er died his dad Judah told him to go and srvice his sister in law Tamar and give her some offspring. So Onan went and had a portion but withdrew before the last chorus and spilled his little soldiers onto the earth. He did this because according to Jewish law any child he created with Tamar would not be considered his heir. God being such an all loving forgiving type chap made sure he was rewarded with an early death.
Many Christians take this to mean that masturbation is forbidden. Which is strange as he was not masturbating and other crazy old testament mitzvahs, or commandments, like circumcision, have been sensibly rejected by Christians. The repercussions of such beliefs continue to echo today. Catholics like strict Orthodox Jews still wont use condoms because weirdly they think that counts as ejaculation outside of the vagina and results in destruction of the seed. Millions die in abject poverty and starvation but at least their parents did not use a condom:-\
In theory your friend should be fine cracking one off as long as he can hold off ejaculating until he finds a welcoming minge.Which probably has to be his wifes.
Anyway back to my original point. Why would God create a penis that during adolescence would involuntarily waste seed outside of a vagina in a horny teenagers sleep? Why let the unmarried get hardons before they can ritualistically dispose of them with their wives in the allowed way? Is he so obsessed with testing us? Why is there nothing in the Torah or Bible against women masturbating? Why is the human foot made up of so many bones and pretty poorly designed for walking upright? An ostrich foot is better. OUR feet were great for climbing as monkeys but give us back, shin and ankle problems because as bipedal hairless monkeys they are inefficient.
And yes you are right it is his Tallywacker. It reminds me of an Old Jethro Joke.
"Son, you didn't ought to be doing that you'll go blind you know"
"I'm over here Dad"
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
your friend is going to hell i'm afraid.... but who wants to be allowed somewhere where he is judged for enjoying something that isn't harming anyone :cool:
A man goes to the doctors and says " every time I sneeze i get a hard on"
the doctor asks if he is taking anything for it.
the man says... "pepper"
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Greenbeanz
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mars_ax
They say that God has a purpose for his creations, this is confirmed every-time you get a stiff one, fact!
Seriously, I was talking to a christian friend of mine a few weeks back who said he felt guilty when he masturbated. (but apparently couldn't help himself) Because the "sex" wasn't with his wife, and therefore God wouldn't approve of it. (I'm not making this up)
I don't know if he listened, but I told him that it was his tallywacker , not "God's" and he could do anything he damn well pleased with it, including jacking-off 10 times a day, without feeling any "guilt".
Thoughts?
It is strange that a omnipotent God should create a body so imperfect for the roles he wished it to fulfil. The Talmudic tradition of referring to spilled seed as the murder of unborn generations and the creation of demons has at it's heart the story of Onan. He was the son of Judah and when his brother Er died his dad Judah told him to go and srvice his sister in law Tamar and give her some offspring. So Onan went and had a portion but withdrew before the last chorus and spilled his little soldiers onto the earth. He did this because according to Jewish law any child he created with Tamar would not be considered his heir. God being such an all loving forgiving type chap made sure he was rewarded with an early death.
Many Christians take this to mean that masturbation is forbidden. Which is strange as he was not masturbating and other crazy old testament mitzvahs, or commandments, like circumcision, have been sensibly rejected by Christians. The repercussions of such beliefs continue to echo today. Catholics like strict Orthodox Jews still wont use condoms because weirdly they think that counts as ejaculation outside of the vagina and results in destruction of the seed. Millions die in abject poverty and starvation but at least their parents did not use a condom:-\
In theory your friend should be fine cracking one off as long as he can hold off ejaculating until he finds a welcoming minge.Which probably has to be his wifes.
Anyway back to my original point. Why would God create a penis that during adolescence would involuntarily waste seed outside of a vagina in a horny teenagers sleep? Why let the unmarried get hardons before they can ritualistically dispose of them with their wives in the allowed way? Is he so obsessed with testing us? Why is there nothing in the Torah or Bible against women masturbating? Why is the human foot made up of so many bones and pretty poorly designed for walking upright? An ostrich foot is better. OUR feet were great for climbing as monkeys but give us back, shin and ankle problems because as bipedal hairless monkeys they are inefficient.
And yes you are right it is his Tallywacker. It reminds me of an Old Jethro Joke.
"Son, you didn't ought to be doing that you'll go blind you know"
"I'm over here Dad"
(The truth will set you free).
The rules are mens doing. Free will is your greatest gift along with life and the big religions would steal both from you, if you allow them to.
Look at celibacy within the church ... Ok Ill empty one up an alter boy instead >:D
Mary Magdalene, never was a prostitute.
Removing womens clitoris is a whimps attempt at keeping women to themselves,how dare they say God got that body part wrong and make an in house law to remove it. They are just as insane as the celibate Catholic priests.
Maybe the Greek translators got Celibate life and celebrate life mixed up :-\.
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
There is no God and you make your own decisions. If someone is so absurd as to think God will be on their case for having a wank then God help them. Religion like most forms of control is based upon nothing more than unsubstantiated fear. It is a deplorable concept that reduces otherwise fairly decent people.
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Saddo
your friend is going to hell i'm afraid.... but who wants to be allowed somewhere where he is judged for enjoying something that isn't harming anyone :cool:
A man goes to the doctors and says " every time I sneeze i get a hard on"
the doctor asks if he is taking anything for it.
the man says... "pepper"
Yup, i'm afraid my friend is going to be crispy fried for an eternity, he just can't keep his hands off of his Johnson. I believe there's an extra hot place in hell reserved for masturbaters. :o (I didn't have the heart to tell him)
Funny stuff, I did actually go to my doctor for a prostate exam again last year, I hate the fucking exam, (let's just say my Dr. has a weird sense of humor) but hey it's better knowing that you don't have cancer or nipping it in the bud if you do. Every-time I go he offers to write me a prescription for, Viagra, Cialis, et al, so this time I said WTF, write me some with a few refills.
A little later an RN had me come into her office, the first thing she tells me, is that i'll probably have a heart attack if I use the viagra/cialis, say what? Then she tells me a story about how Viagra was discovered, it seems the ingredients use to be used as an experimental blood pressure medication, until it started causing some people to have heart attacks, and it was recalled. It had also been given to a group of 5 men and 5 women who were asked to return it to their Dr. All the women complied, but none of the men would because they were getting erections, some who hadn't had any in years.
So that's how Viagra was born, as well as all the other hard-on meds, which have the same basic ingredients. :cool:
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Gandalf
There is no God and you make your own decisions. If someone is so absurd as to think God will be on their case for having a wank then God help them. Religion like most forms of control is based upon nothing more than unsubstantiated fear. It is a deplorable concept that reduces otherwise fairly decent people.
I'm a hardcore atheist, and a cynic when it comes to religion, but I still can understand why many people benefit from it, even if in reality it's just the placebo effect. I can handle the stark reality that there is no god or jesus like the one's described in the bible, and no heaven or hell except for the one we may experience here on earth. For many however, illusions can be comforting, and who am I to say they can't believe what they want, no-matter how ridiculous it may be.
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Mars and Gandalf I've sat in your chair and know the feeling 100%. I think only people who have astral traveled know what is above and below this the third dimension. To a material brain anything else all would seem to be imagination.
Until you solve a crime with it or take someone physically where you have been in spirit and explain it to them in detail before you both arrive can the material mind even begin to comprehend eltro magnetic energy co-existing outside the physical realm.
You believe 100% you are your thoughts and when your brain dies you die. You are more than your own thoughts but until you learn how to not think and learn how to put it in neutral, you wont be able to experience even the first % of it.
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
I'd imagine God has enough two legged dicks and assholes in need of a lightning strike to worry about the one in me pants, but if he made it his business it wouldn't be the first time some Diva cock blocked me :-X
The question is that if God gets the dicks...whos in charge of all the pussy ??? :bowdown: We need to TALK!!!!
Re: Does God have a purpose for your penis?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mars_ax
They say that God has a purpose for his creations, this is confirmed every-time you get a stiff one, fact!
Seriously, I was talking to a christian friend of mine a few weeks back who said he felt guilty when he masturbated. (but apparently couldn't help himself) Because the "sex" wasn't with his wife, and therefore God wouldn't approve of it. (I'm not making this up)
I don't know if he listened, but I told him that it was his tallywacker , not "God's" and he could do anything he damn well pleased with it, including jacking-off 10 times a day, without feeling any "guilt".
Thoughts?
only purpose ever was was stickin it into a cunt and having babies.
