Originally Posted by
DGs_Diane
Ahhhh teenage love, oh how I remember that so well. My high school love and I were together for almost 5 years, and during that time we only got into 1, yes only 1 fight. Everybody thought that we were the perfect couple. We were talking about getting engaged, we were looking at rings, when BAM, he met this bitch that worked by him, and that was all she wrote. I was devastated, I couldn't eat, sleep, and I cried constantly. And what made it worse, is that he would not be honest with me, and come out and tell me that he met someone else, to which 6 months later he proposed to her, 4 months later they were married, and 1 month later she was pregnant. Talk about rubbing salt into my wound!
I know that everyone says this, and they say it because it's true, but time does heal all wounds. It took some time for me to get over him, but I did, I allowed myself time to get through the emotional stuff, and then slowly but surely, I started to go out with my friends, and tried to meet new people.
You said that this is her last year of school, I know that a lot of girls, and guys, start to get that itch of freedom in their senior year, and feel like they just don't want to be tied down to just one person. If she is going off to college, that can play a major roll in her decision as well.
I have to ask you, does she seem as heartbroken as you? If not, then that right there should tell you that her feelings weren't as deep as yours. And if that is the case, would you really want to get back with someone that doesn't love you? If after a year, she doesn't love you the same way as you do her, the chances are, she never will, and if you were able to get back with her, more than likely the result will be the same, only this time you will be even more heartbroken than the first time.
My advice to you - move on. You are only 19, and you have the best years ahead of you, so why would you want to be tied down, when you should be out having fun with your friends, and trying to meet new people? You should be taking the time to do things in your life that will help you grow as a person. Whether that is continuing your education, travel, participating in sports, or just going out and having fun with your friends. Just live life!!!!
Trust me, you will find that one person who loves you for your heart one day, but until then, don't let this girl continue to hold you back from enjoying your life. It is obvious that you have a great heart, otherwise you would not be feeling this way, and as a woman, I respect that you, and the other guys here, are sharing your feelings so publicly, not many guys would, so I commend you guys for being so open.
The biggest hurdle for you right now, is understanding the why, especially since it seems that she really hasn't given enough of a reason. When it happened to me, that was the hardest part to deal with, not knowing why. So, I would ask her to please at least have enough respect for you, and for what you shared for a year, to be honest with you about her reasons. Tell her that you respect her wanting to break-up, but you just want to be able to understand why. Hopefully she will be honest with you, if not, again, would you want to be with someone that doesn't respect you enough to be honest?
The don'ts.
Your emotions are in high gear right now, so don't try to do things like follow her, or constantly call her, or try to get her friends to help you, or any possilbe immature stunt to try and win her back. They don't work!! And later on, you will look back and think, boy was I being pathetic!! Trust me on this one, because I did it all, and I regret how stupid I was.
Don't let her use you. At certain times she will feel that itch of feeling lonely, and wanting someone, and she may call upon you. Don't fall for it. Teenage girls are not emotionally mature, and will play games with you and your heart. And once she realizes that she got what she wanted, it will be buh bye for you again, only to leave you hurt once again. So stay strong, and don't give in to that urge, and the thought of the possibility.
Don't try to date another girl to either make her jealous, or to help you get over her, that doesn't work either. Oh she may feel a twinge of jealousy, and might ask you guys to get together, but again, that is just an emotional game for her. And for you, it won't help heal your wound any faster, and in the process you can hurt the girl you are using.
So basically, just give yourself some time to get through all the emotions. Start to go out with your friends, and meet new people, without trying to meet that someone special, at least for now. Enjoy being single, have fun, and one day, love will find you again.
If you happen to look to music for inspiration during certain times in your life, keep listening to "Goodbye" by Gravity Kills, that will put you into a strong break-up mode.
Good luck, stay strong, and don't worry, you will find that true special girl.
And I'm giving you rep for having the courage to share your feelings, not many would. Believe it or not, but women really do appreciate guys that can share their feelings, because it shows that you are strong, and confident in yourself.
