Cleaning Question - Exciting, I know...

This is kind of gross, but does anyone know how to clean the yellow piss (I assume its piss) stains off the bottom of a toilet seat? I've been cleaning for about 45 mins and making very little headway. My girlfriend is a bit of a hippie (not the hairy armpit, "I won't suck a dick because its degrading" kind, but a bit of a hippie nonetheless), so she gets all our cleaning products from a place called the Soap Exchange where all the stuff they sell is biodegradable etc., so maybe the stuff I'm using isn't heavy-duty enough, I don't know, though it has corrosive warning symbols all over it. Should I just give up and buy a new seat?

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Originally Posted by CFH

This is kind of gross, but does anyone know how to clean the yellow piss (I assume its piss) stains off the bottom of a toilet seat? I've been cleaning for about 45 mins and making very little headway. My girlfriend is a bit of a hippie (not the hairy armpit, "I won't suck a dick because its degrading" kind, but a bit of a hippie nonetheless), so she gets all our cleaning products from a place called the Soap Exchange where all the stuff they sell is biodegradable etc., so maybe the stuff I'm using isn't heavy-duty enough, I don't know, though it has corrosive warning symbols all over it. Should I just give up and buy a new seat?

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wait.. so.. she does give blowjobs then?

Steel whool And Bleach...........Or white paint Lol

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Originally Posted by RP33

wait.. so.. she does give blowjobs then?

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lmao ;D Yes, yes she does. When I allow her the privilege.

Ok maybe I'm being a little clueless here but how is it even possible to piss on the underside of a toilet seat?

You do know you are supposed to aim down into the bowl right?

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Originally Posted by CFH

lmao ;D Yes, yes she does. When I allow her the privilege.

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good to hear haha..

i'd just go with a new seat if that stuff doesn't work.. i would've stopped after 5 minutes..

can't you like, do the dishes and make her clean the bathroom? that usually works for me.

Get a new one. Sounds like its been corroded by piss. Piss corrodes everything.

Learn how to aim your pecker too

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Originally Posted by bilbo

Ok maybe I'm being a little clueless here but how is it even possible to piss on the underside of a toilet seat?

You do know you are supposed to aim down into the bowl right?

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I didn't piss on the underside goddamnit, its from when you flush the toilet, it sprays upwards.

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Originally Posted by RP33

good to hear haha..

i'd just go with a new seat if that stuff doesn't work.. i would've stopped after 5 minutes..

can't you like, do the dishes and make her clean the bathroom? that usually works for me.

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To be perfectally honest, she does probably about 80% of the cleaning, maybe more. I was trying to do something nice for her by cleaning the bathroom.

There are five people reading a thread about cleaning piss off a toilet seat. :)

OMG, I am so glad I decided to read this thread, after working an 11 hour day, it was great to find a thread that made me laugh so much. I needed this, thanks guys!!

Oh by the way, try bleach, if that doesn't work, spend the $15 and get a new one.

Oh, and I'm glad to hear that your girl takes care of you. ;) :splurt:

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Originally Posted by DGs_Diane

OMG, I am so glad I decided to read this thread, after working an 11 hour day, it was great to find a thread that made me laugh so much. I needed this, thanks guys!!

Oh by the way, try bleach, if that doesn't work, spend the $15 and get a new one.

Oh, and I'm glad to hear that your girl takes care of you. ;) :splurt:

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Well, she wouldn't be much of a girlfriend if she didn't.

I've pretty much given up cleaning the bottom of the seat at this point, in a few days there's probably going to be a thread on here from a frusterated CFH asking how to attach a new seat.

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Originally Posted by Kirkland Laing

There are five people reading a thread about cleaning piss off a toilet seat. :)

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haha you actually made me snort with laughter then.:D

Ajax and Bleach will do the trick. ;)

There needs to be a laughing smilie option.

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Originally Posted by RP33

wait.. so.. she does give blowjobs then?

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lmfao! ;D

That's fuckin' funny.

Buy a new seat man, damn!

Try pissing on a rag and using that, CFH.

Sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.

Funny thread.

For the seat you are better off getting a new one. But for the bowl you should get a pumice stone. Especially if you are trying to use biodegradable products. A pumice stone will get the hardwater stains off and there isn't a bio cleaning product that will. Get it from a pool supply store. It will last years.

pumice you idiot will just scratch the surface and make it more porous.:rolleyes:

why are you all saying use bleach if his woman won't use it? You all just read 'blow job' and that was the end of the thread:cool:

1. Try cleaning it more often so you don't get build up.:-\
2. Change the seat and start again.

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Originally Posted by Missy

pumice you idiot will just scratch the surface and make it more porous.:rolleyes:

why are you all saying use bleach if his woman won't use it? You all just read 'blow job' and that was the end of the thread:cool:

1. Try cleaning it more often so you don't get build up.:-\
2. Change the seat and start again.

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...or better yet, just replace the whole toilet bowl.;D

1) Just rip off the seat and dont replace it, sure it might be cold and lower to use but at least you dont have to worry about cleaning off the piss anymore;)

2) replace it with a yellow seat and never worry about the pesky piss stains anymore:cool:

Somebody just can't aim it good.:( Have you try the cheerio target thing? 'Works with my 3 year old boy.;D

Again, you illiterate bastards, it has nothing to do with aim. It's caused by flushing the toilet, which sprays small amounts of water upwards, over time this accumulates on the bottom of the seat.
Mythbusters did an episode on it once.

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Originally Posted by Missy

why are you all saying use bleach if his woman won't use it? You all just read 'blow job' and that was the end of the thread:cool:

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(Reads 'blow job' ONLY)
(Ziiiiiip)
(Un-zips pants)

"I'm ready Missy" :D

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Originally Posted by JT Rock

2) replace it with a yellow seat and never worry about the pesky piss stains anymore:cool:

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I like your thinking 'Pinky' :)

Fuk It, Go retro and start sporting some diapers :-X

Just a matter of time for all of us anyways as we get to be ancient and leaky ;D

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Originally Posted by Spicoli surfs 'Nawlins

Fuk It, Go retro and start sporting some diapers :-X

Just a matter of time for all of us anyways as we get to be ancient and leaky ;D

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you ever see that movie Idiocracy? They have toilets built into recliners.. so you can watch tv and do your biz at the same time.. classic.

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Originally Posted by Spicoli surfs 'Nawlins

Fuk It, Go retro and start sporting some diapers :-X

Just a matter of time for all of us anyways as we get to be ancient and leaky ;D

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Man, I work with old people, and some of them genuinely do not give a fuck about pissing or shitting themselves infront of people. Sometimes they don't even notice. It's kinda fucked.
I hope I have the pressence of mind to off myself if I'm ever in that situation.

This thread rules.

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Originally Posted by Kirkland Laing

There are five people reading a thread about cleaning piss off a toilet seat. :)

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and then going off to check the underside of thier toilet for piss stains



if you haven't brought a new seat yet mix sugar and fresh squeezed lemon juice put in on like a paste leave it for a while then scrub thats nice and new age too


oh and by the way if u went with the bleach all that has done is stain the piss white not take it off sorry lollollololololololololol hahahaha

Cuttle fish off the beach ,remove the shell, the soft part removes most stuff without harsh scratching, you can dip in bleach.
This even gets paint spots off soft marble without scratching and cleans and polishes burnt steel pots too.
(ITs an old stonemasons proceedure).

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Originally Posted by Andre

Cuttle fish off the beach ,remove the shell, the soft part removes most stuff without harsh scratching, you can dip in bleach.
This even gets paint spots off soft marble without scratching and cleans and polishes burnt steel pots too.
(ITs an old stonemasons proceedure).

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lol you definitely earnt some rep for the best and most bizarre solution yet!

Some might feel that a trip to the beach, the hiring of a boat and the hours required to catch one might mean it would be easier to just buy a new seat but full marks for ingenuity :cool:

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Originally Posted by Bilbo

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Originally Posted by Andre

Cuttle fish off the beach ,remove the shell, the soft part removes most stuff without harsh scratching, you can dip in bleach.
This even gets paint spots off soft marble without scratching and cleans and polishes burnt steel pots too.
(ITs an old stonemasons proceedure).

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lol you definitely earnt some rep for the best and most bizarre solution yet!

Some might feel that a trip to the beach, the hiring of a boat and the hours required to catch one might mean it would be easier to just buy a new seat but full marks for ingenuity :cool:

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;D lmao

Dont hundreds of dead ones float up your beaches like they do here?