Okay guys, you can't lie about your manhood size anymore

[Trainer Monkey]

Im just over the 6inch mark. But seriously it is the most beautiful dick you have ever seen,i was first in line for perfection.

I once went to the doctors and laid it out on her table."She said "whats wrong with it?'
I said "nothing, its a beauty isnt it?

I have the stupidest scar on mine,I was asleep and my cat was also sleeping on the bed,I must have had a dream that made the blanket twitch somehow,cause even through two covers,well needless to say I woke up in a hurry and threw the cat off the bed

ha ha quality

Thats one of those "funny in hindsight" sort of things.
The cat used to sleep with me all the time,and he liked to play,so Id humor him by flicking my fingers under the covers and letting him pounce on them,with the logic of,hey,it hurts less then if he was hitting bare skin,and it humors the cat. I wasnt awake for most of the incident,but either I moved wrong,or was having a better class of dream,and the giant furball must have thought I was playing.
There is no alarm clock on earth that works as well as a cat claw stuck through two layers of blanket and in to that area. You wake up damned quick