I kinda need advice. Bad times.

[ono]

I'm going to offer a bit of alternative advice and go with this...

[ono]

This is rapidly becoming one of Saddo's most legendary girl threads.

We've had El Gamo getting a girl pregnant through a dry hump, Ono's six month quest for a kiss, my own personal favourite, namely Booze's telephoning his condolences to a girl he'd never met sympathising with the death of her father and asking if she might like a date, and now JB's panic attack because a girl stares at the back of his head whilst he's driving the bus.

Really, on reflection, Booze is the biggest man here by far, at least he took action even if it was hysterically the wrong action.

time waster. Should have just asked me.

Oh Missy you saucy devil

[superheavyrhun]

Dear Jimanuel Boogustus,

Would you like the opportunity to win a £2.50 bargain booze voucher? Do you have a few moments to take a quick survey on the quality of advice that the site has provided?

Please rate between one and five stars.

1* - Terrible
2* - Mediocre
3* - Average
4* - Good
5* - Life Changing

[Jimanuel Boogustus]

No seriously, about the bus. No, the school i'm covering for at the minute is a private school that houses a preparatory school, a secondary school and a college (or something to that effect), all mixed gender.

On the route i'm covering there are probably 6 from each, she is the only girl not in uniform.

So?

Ask for a different route. Is this how you're going to react every time you see an attractive girl/woman? Why don't you man up and dump your fat pregnant wife and run off to bedsit lounge with a school kid? That's what you want to hear?

What the fuck are thinking?

Oh Missy don't be like that... I tell you what, this is ridiculous and not exactly fair. I really expect better from you. I don't mean to be mean but are you really that dumb?

No YOU fucking wake up and listen.

Everyone on the thread has pretty much given you the same advice. Leave it alone. But you keep going on about it. So you don't want to hear 'leave it/her alone'. You want someone to say go fuck her. Then fine, I said it for you so you can take zero responsibilty for your own actions.

You don't want advice? Don't ask for it.
You don't like the advice? Tough shit. I'm not paid to hear your sob stories.

I think this is the 1st time a post has genuinely stressed me out. My god you really are that dumb. Or maybe just blinded by your own life experiences? Either way, you a sooo Barking up the wrong tree it is unbelievable! 'Leave it alone'... don't insult my integrity you sour faced lonely old hag.

[Jimanuel Boogustus]

I really regret ever thinking that a bunch of cunts could ever offer genuine advice. I hope all your children get spinal biffida... Or whatever Bilbo had. Cunts.

[ono]

I really regret ever thinking that a bunch of cunts could ever offer genuine advice. I hope all your children get spinal biffida... Or whatever Bilbo had. Cunts.

I offered you some cracking advice.

[BIG H]

I'm going to offer a bit of alternative advice and go with this...

Genius

[Memphis]

Ok this is a simple one Jim. You have three very clear options.

1. Go for it, you only live once
2. Ignore it, let it pass
3. Avoid it, get a different route/quit.

Id probably go in that order to be fair but then Im not married to your wife, if I was there would almost certainly be weirdness between us and I dont want that. I feel like I've dodged a bullet even mentioning it.

Hope this helps.

P.S : When Mick arrives and says you should tie her up, cover her in goose fat, kill her and then stuff her in the boot of your car............that isnt really an option.

[Kev]

I really regret ever thinking that a bunch of cunts could ever offer genuine advice. I hope all your children get spinal biffida... Or whatever Bilbo had. Cunts.

haha brilliant, this thread has given so much.

Actually my advice has been very sensible. Nothing is going to happen. It's ok to secretly fancy her and imagine your wife is her when you have sex. No harm done, the end.

[CFH]

I really regret ever thinking that a bunch of cunts could ever offer genuine advice. I hope all your children get spinal biffida... Or whatever Bilbo had. Cunts.

What in the fuck are you mad about? Literally everyone in this thread gave you genuine advice.

What do you want us to say? No one thinks this is a big deal and it in no way jeopardizes either you job or your relationship. Be polite and professional, but distant, when interacting with the girl and accept that you're going to find other women, including ones arbitrarily deemed 'underage' or whatever, and just fucking deal with it.

Nothing bad can happen if you conduct yourself like a normal human being. Now, if the problem is that you really want to fuck her that might say something about your relationship and then you need to examine that. But if your only concern is these seemingly irrational fears, then you're just fine. The girl isn't going to make a move on you, she's not going to accuse you of acting unprofessionally, and just career and family life are both going to be fine.

Unless there is more to the story than you have told, there are no problems but those you create for yourself.

[El Kabong]

I really regret ever thinking that a bunch of cunts could ever offer genuine advice. I hope all your children get spinal biffida... Or whatever Bilbo had. Cunts.

I offered you some cracking advice.

....As did I you ungrateful bastard!

[Gandalf]

Interesting thread. Nice way to kill an office hour.

I don't really see the big deal. There is no harm in seeing someone as attractive or them making silly flirtatious moves, but as an older guy with a lot of life experience you just take it for what it is. It's nothing in the great scheme of things. I get called cute every day and some of these girls are hot, but it's nothing more than a young girl saying something and in an innocent kind of way, but even if it wasn't, I wouldn't spend too much time considering it. I take it for what it is. I do my work and then outside of work forget about it. What you seem to be doing is taking it far too seriously and are thus building up some kind of complex or issue out of it.

You have your life and what you know is right, you are making a bit of a mountain out of a molehill here. Missy has been harsh, but bang on the money IMO. Might as well call a spade a spade.

[ono]

Interesting thread. Nice way to kill an office hour.

I don't really see the big deal. There is no harm in seeing someone as attractive or them making silly flirtatious moves, but as an older guy with a lot of life experience you just take it for what it is. It's nothing in the great scheme of things. I get called cute every day and some of these girls are hot, but it's nothing more than a young girl saying something and in an innocent kind of way, but even if it wasn't, I wouldn't spend too much time considering it. I take it for what it is. I do my work and then outside of work forget about it. What you seem to be doing is taking it far too seriously and are thus building up some kind of complex or issue out of it.

You have your life and what you know is right, you are making a bit of a mountain out of a molehill here. Missy has been harsh, but bang on the money IMO. Might as well call a spade a spade.

Exactly, all in a day's work for Miles.

I'm still not understanding why he's feeling guilty about fancying a 17 year old. Lou from Neighbours was tapping Libby and there was about a 60 year age gap. Nobody cared.

[Gandalf]

Interesting thread. Nice way to kill an office hour.

I don't really see the big deal. There is no harm in seeing someone as attractive or them making silly flirtatious moves, but as an older guy with a lot of life experience you just take it for what it is. It's nothing in the great scheme of things. I get called cute every day and some of these girls are hot, but it's nothing more than a young girl saying something and in an innocent kind of way, but even if it wasn't, I wouldn't spend too much time considering it. I take it for what it is. I do my work and then outside of work forget about it. What you seem to be doing is taking it far too seriously and are thus building up some kind of complex or issue out of it.

You have your life and what you know is right, you are making a bit of a mountain out of a molehill here. Missy has been harsh, but bang on the money IMO. Might as well call a spade a spade.

Exactly, all in a day's work for Miles.

I'm still not understanding why he's feeling guilty about fancying a 17 year old. Lou from Neighbours was tapping Libby and there was about a 60 year age gap. Nobody cared.

Totally, now if he was banging this 17 year old, then the guilt should kick in, but to be having an over dramatic fantasy it isn't hurting anyone unless he starts blabbing too everyone he knows.

Entertaining thread, but a bit over my head really. I don't get it.

[Howlin Mad Missy]

Jim, call me what you like. I'm not the one getting cold feet about how my life will change forever when a nipper comes along.

Why don't you tell us what advice you would like to hear. Go fuck her or ignore her.

Miles, some people need a dose of harsh to cut through the BS.