Asian/Indian BT scam callers?

**Primo Carnera** · 05-06-2017 11:32 AM

Fuck 'em! I've got loads of different tactics depending on my mood and whether I can be bothered.
1. "Have you had a car accident that wasn't your fault?"
Me - "yes I did!"
They get so shocked they put you through to someone higher up! They ask me the same and tell me I can claim blah,blah.
Me - "it's ok, I've decided I don't want to claim because my injury was only a lacerated penis and I don't use it much anyway!"
2. "Do you want to save money on your Electric?"
Me- no thank you.
"You don't want to save money?"
Me - no, I like paying more!
3. "We've noticed serious viruses on your computer"
Me - I don't have a computer! In fact I don't have electricity or gas! (I also use this for no.2.)
4. "Are you interested in Double Glazing?"
Me - sorry, I don't have any Windows.
"Are you sure you don't have any Windows?"
Me - are you calling me a liar?
Finally, if I can't be fucked to do that ,
5. "Are you interested in double Glazing?"
Me - Yes I am actually.
"They start their spiel, and I say "oh yes" like I'm interested! They then start talking, and I leave the phone on the Side and carry on doing what I was doing. 15 minutes later I go back and put the phone back on the hook.
I got caught out once as the guy was still on the phone when I went back, he gave me a shitload of abuse and I pissed myself.

**Batman** · 05-06-2017 07:45 PM

I had one just yesterday

Caller: we believe you was in an accident recently
Me: yes that's correct, I was an innocent passenger in my friends vehicle, someone hit him in the rear whilst we were stationary at traffic lights
C: do you want to make a claim
M: damn right I do, I wasn't actually injured and they were only travelling 3mph but I'm happy to make money out of it, do you think I should tell them that I suffered from pain to my neck back and shoulders along with whiplash related headaches and a fear and travel?
C: yes that would be great
M: ok then, so what is the process? I'm guessing that you will send me some forms and you will want me to sign a form of authority which states everything be made payable to you, then you will send me to an independent medical examiner, I will try to make out that my injuries are relatively simple because I don't want the claim to be inflated because we don't want it to fall out of the ministry of justice process now do we.
C: ........eeeerrrrrrmmmm well......
M: wait a minute you do know about the MOJ process don't you?
C: eerrrrrmmmm we are a very reputable company and have been working with injury claims for nearly 8 years
M: hmmm that's interesting because I've been working in bodily injury claims for a few years now and I've never had to deal with a claim from yourselves before
C: eeerrrrmmmm
M: actually now that you come to mention it, you have taken all these details from me but you haven't actually asked for my name or the registration numbers of the vehicles involved
C: ok thankyou for wasting my time

**Memphis** · 05-09-2017 05:08 AM

I was pissing about doing next to nothing when I was about 18 or so, a mate said to me want to work in town, air con office, wear what you like, all you got to do is make a few phone calls. I was in like Flynn.

Obviously it turned out to be a shitty call center setup. It wasn't scamming, it was a legit council (business rates) tax rebate service for which they took a slice. They'd routinely wind people up, the ones that specifically said dont bother calling me again. It was grubby and cheap but that didnt stop some of them thinking they were Jordan Belfort.

I use the Primo method. Leave them talking to thin air for a while, go along with it for as long as you can.

My mum used to get shit loads of calls asking for this one particular person, always from the same company. One day I saw the Sean Lock wrong number sketch. Went round her house and put it into practice. Great fun.