Miles,
Other than after a long night of sex I mastered the art of not missing the toilet sometime around the age of 10. If you need some help with your aim come by the house, we are currently potty training my 2 yr old.
Miles,
Other than after a long night of sex I mastered the art of not missing the toilet sometime around the age of 10. If you need some help with your aim come by the house, we are currently potty training my 2 yr old.
Most bad government has grown out of too much government. Thomas Jefferson
Are you training him to pee standing up?
If every man did his business sitting down the world would be more cleanly and peaceful. Women don't like the seat being up and I happen to agree with them. I don't have any issues with aiming myself, but why take that risk? It's like unsafe sex with a random woman, very exciting, but too much danger. Likewise with peeing whilst standing.
If others want to stand then that it their call, but I shall do what I do. It isn't hurting anyone and has its merits. This thread has simply been made to call me out and try and make me look less than manly and maybe get mocked, but I don't care. I am quite happy to sit on a nice comfortable seat and think about Peter Cook monologues whilst I urinate.
I sit down to pee. My bone marrow transplant fucked up my uerthra and it contains scarring down the tube that means urine comes out at a weird angle. Sometimes it's almost straight, other times it will come out in two or even three streams, and in any direction.
I could stand up and pee and point at the toilet and literally fire simultaneously both to the left and right of it. It's quite a trick, and a sight to behold but to save making a mess I sit down.
I could have it corrected, but it would require an electric wire stuck down my japseye and the scarring burned away so I just sit down instead.
I've become totally used to it and consider it more civilised now. Also I have no armpit hair whatsover as a result of radiotherapy which probably sounds gay too, but I most definitely would never want it back.
I pee sitting down and my armpits are smooth and fresh. I represent a more evolved and less brutish male for the 21st century.
Last edited by Kev; 08-02-2011 at 07:28 AM.
Well done Bilbo, you have proven yourself on a higher level than these other biblical period primates. What kind of man stands to pee in the 21st century? One that is gradually giving way to cuter, smarter, sophisticated men who know how to use a toilet properly.
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Do you all stand up shitting? I mean, what is the big difference? You sit down for one and yet stand for the other. It reeks of double standards and faux masculinity. Surely a real man stands up whilst he takes a dump. You people are all hypocrites. You are like bi-sexuals, you just want a bit of everything. Either stand up and do all your business or sit down. I have chosen my option and I quite like sitting down.
There is nothing gay about it at all.
You can piss standing without defecating on your legs, the same cannot be said for shitting. Also, unless your dick is minuscule and several feet away from the toilet - accuracy shouldn't be a problem, again the same can't be said for shitting whilst standing.
Shitting sitting is a necessity, pissing sitting is not... hence it is not a double standard but a personal choice.
Speaking of personal choice... to me sitting above a piss pot with your pants around your ankles is only a little more evolved that squatting over a hole in the forest.
But honestly, sitting/standing... you're excreting at the end of the day... it's a bit like arguing whether a smack head or a glue sniffer is the classier drug user... they're both scumbags.
You've really got to be clutching at straws if the way you piss is something that defines you... whether you think standing makes you the epitome of masculinity or that sitting makes you a classy gent.
So you're saying that whilst Bilbo sits down to piss... he is still a 'biblical period primate', he's just on a higher level than the others.
I'm also not sure where you're coming from by referring to people as Primates... it is 100% fact that you are indeed a Primate, whilst I'm not a Taxonomist, I am pretty sure that a preference of posture when pissing isn't one of the characteristics used to further classify the species or even family of a primate.
Stop being a Morris Minor!
Bilbo and Miles will never procreate. If they do they will be diluting their genes with either angry Korean genes or fat Jeremy Kyle fodder genes.
They are hardly pushing the species forward![]()
When God said to the both of us "Which one of you wants to be Sugar Ray?" I guess I didnt raise my hand fast enough
Charley Burley
I like my partners to piss standing, much easier to get it in my mouth
AdamGB, learn to differentiate between humourous posting and serious posting. The language and imagery I am using is intended to be both entertaining and, at the very least least slightly funny. I am in no way getting getting into a bitching contest on the merits of stand shitting or sit down shitting, we are all quite agreed that sitting down is the norm. I just happen to like pissing doing much the same whilst in the comforts of my home and more so in bars where men seem to look at my junk with wonder and perhaps more.
Either way it is no big deal for a man to sit down. As Andre rightfully points out a man touches down onto the canvas at least once a day, I just do it slightly more often as I sit for all functions. Heck I sometimes even sit on the toilet seat whilst brushing my teeth. It is a comfortable place to be.
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