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Thread: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

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    Default "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    "Woke Coke"

    by Gandalf


    The unicorns and empathetic
    All lined up to be magnetic
    And though the Coca-Cola poured so bubbly
    One of them keeps talking of jubbly

    Yet he was instrumental for the fun
    To frolick in the noonday sun
    And throw me down a tin mine on my ass
    And accuse me of flirting with a 14 year old lass
    When he knows damn well anything under 18 I take a pass!

    Well he is back and I think of David Bowie
    So he may post fast or even a little slowie
    Or talk Bitcoin or Burroughs or Jordan Peterson or Alice Cooper
    While Tito waits for poems about a pooper

    Now Walrus will crack open some champagne
    And Lyle just the same
    WHile others should all welcome the Returned Wizard
    And be thankful they avoided the blizzard

    Welcome back, you well-dressed fellow
    The forum missed you, and all say hellow

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    A traitor to the queen by fins berry humperdink

    Miles turned his back on her majesty
    Always saying to independent England it’s a travesty
    To have a monarchy
    Even though seems to me
    The British be
    More caught up in trump
    Than what a mess there country tis of thee
    That ain’t no liberty
    That’s jive talk hustle
    Punks couldn’t cut here for half a day
    In the concrete jungle
    They be saying pip pip tally hoo
    While me and my boys knife them to the ground like fools
    What’s a drive by in London ?
    Someone sayin boo?
    Out here homey don’t play that
    So keep talkin Trump you fools
    So Gandalf is a sovereign of her majesty
    To deny it is a travesty
    Her majesty
    Is a pretty nice girl but she doesn’t have a lot to say
    Her majesty is a pretty nice girl but she change from day to day
    I wanna tell her that I love her a lot but I gotta get a belly full of wine
    Her majesty is a pretty nice girls some day I’m gonna make her mine
    So miles better drop the rock
    Smoke that crack
    You get whacked
    Livin in Asia
    That shit Fantasia
    I ain’t no beast of burden
    It’s just my feet are hurtin
    I ain’t building no igloo
    That shit be cold
    But free of mold
    So what’s the whack
    Is miles back
    Or is Brock talkin shit
    Like selling those kits
    Of salad mix
    And Mexico kicks
    They ain’t cages they shelters the times said so
    So don’t you go
    Gettin it twisted
    It was trump who ruined all this shit
    All the presidents before him were perfect and shit
    So bring back miles
    The forum will be smiles
    Soros broke the pound
    But my mind is sound
    I been mining that bitcoin
    Since it’s been around
    Lambos coke and hookers for me
    Not for thee
    There I said you see

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Sitting in an English garden waiting for the sun, if the sun don’t come you get your tan from standing in the English rain
    I am the eggman
    They are the eggman
    I am the Walrus
    Goo goo ga joob


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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf



    @Gandalf is this what you meant ??

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    can anybody on this forum who is left-leaning please state that this is crazy? yes or no. simply state it.


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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Quote Originally Posted by NoSavingByTheBell View Post
    can anybody on this forum who is left-leaning please state that this is crazy? yes or no. simply state it.



    NO it is not crazy.

    YES he is crazy.

    YES you are crazy.

    State it?

    IT.

    Is that what you were after?


    First you have to ask why an Armenian/Italian/American living down in Texas is so worried about a 'PROPOSED' bill of law in California being presented as though it were news (Last March) by an Australian ex Football player who I assume does not live in California either.

    Even more bizarre is how this Mainstream Murdock outrage addicted muppet is being presented as the voice of sanity when he has devoted a whole section on his show to what he calls 'Woke News'.

    Over here in the UK most Toy shops are not divided into boys and girls toys anyway. They are put into groups so that you may have an aisle of dolls and another of board games and another of pushbikes etc and they are not separated by gender at all. It is a bit odd that supposedly in America they are. Most girls will choose to play with baby dolls and most boys will choose to play with action figures but actually there has always been a massive crossover and most kids will play with their other siblings toys regardless of gender.

    The actress thing again is a classic case of him being desperate to virtue signal his own broflake credentials. He seems to be saying that an actress suggesting that the interviewers vacuous questions were a bit stupid was a perfect example of her being somehow offensive. It is so massively dishonest of him because there he was rolling his eyes at the same stupid questions, as though it were the actress' fault they were being asked. That was demonstrated he said, by her suggesting that to ask what she looks for in a man assumes her sexuality. Which it does.

    He then caps off a whole section in which he has virtue signaled his own misogyny and basic untruthfulness by describing her as "A Shelia you have never heard of". Despite him saying she was an elite movie star? Which again sums up the section. Here is stuff nobody cares about but i want to use as an excuse to virtue signal my outrage.

    Sad.



    That is despite him claiming she was an expert on everything because of being in the Spiderman films ( something only he claimed not her) and having a title he unknowingly did not realise actually described himself perfectly

    "ELITE SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS KNOWS NO BOUNDS".

    He then rounds the section off by proving that not embracing the prescribed blue or pink based baby shower theme is enough to make the big nappy wearing prick cry and tear up his script to prove his broflake credentials.

    Not every parent wants to know the sex of their child before birth, and baby showers are just commercial bullshit anyway. Being in Taupe or any other colour than pink or blue is not going to change that. Again nobody suggested unborn babies would be offended but he wishes that people had so he could again wave his virtue signalling prescribed anti PC bullshit around.

    These guys

    Like the long haired ginger prick too

    are more embarrassing than the ultra PC fruitcakes they are trying to mock.


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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Yeah... let's dispense with the messenger and get straight to the message.

    https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/cali...180011841.html

    "This California Bill Would Require Some Retailers to Have Gender-Neutral Floor Space"


    Now... this article is a year old, so I have no idea whether or not the bill was passed.

    Still, the question begs asking... why on Earth is the California state legislation wasting taxpayers' money on such a ludicrous piece of legislation?

    Stores are stores. Clothing is clothing. Someone wants to put on a man's jacket and a woman's skirt? Go for it. Mix and match. Knock yourself out choosing your clothing style.

    Leave these poor, miserable retailers alone, FFS.

    And toys...

    What the hell is the problem with segregating them the way they've always been? Trucks go here... dolls go there... Again, pick and choose and knock yourself out.

    There must be a scarcity of real problems in California.



    Now... if the laws REQUIRES retailers to LABEL areas of the store as "gender-neutral".... OMG, that is such insufferable bullshit.

    Memo to California: Either drop the pushy agenda, or secede from the Union.

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Do they seriously have boys and girls toys sections in American toy shops?

    Is it just permanently 1950 there?

    Also it is very funny to hear all these non Californians calling out Californians for being intolerant or too tolerant?

    Ha!

    To be honest a non gender clothing section would save me a fortune in grandkids clothes when they are handed from brother to sister. Who cares what sex wellies, trainers, jeans, plain sweaters, socks etc are?

    They are not suggesting removing boys and girls clothing sections just adding a non gender section in some large stalls. What is so offensive about more choice?

    Its not a drag store ffs.

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Quote Originally Posted by NoSavingByTheBell View Post


    @Gandalf is this what you meant ??
    Yes, another company talking absolute bollocks. Stick to selling Coke you daft sods. You could imagine them in Germany 1932: 'Come on Jews, be less darn Jewish'. How is that a good idea?

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Literally woke up to the Earth shattering news that one toy maker will no longer designate a "Mr or Mrs" Potato Head ffs . Have to be real here that sounds pretty short bus. As far as toy sections a lot of these are not officially 'designated' that I'm aware of. Cloths yes but the last time I strolled through a toy aisle..for a friend of course..the frilly Barbies were just down from the action figures and model airplanes. Guarantee you'll piss the kiddos off more, and the parents, because what is the one thing a kid hates doing with parents...shopping for cloths in the first place. They want to get in and out. That bill would seem to not be directed at Mon & Pop small businesses. By definition it applies to stores with a 500 employee base per location . Walmart doesn't even have 500 employees on location. Definitely not as far as cashiers are concerned. Every State has ass backwards laws and proposals on the books. Guess we all take that into account choosing to live their. People in parts of Ca. are more outraged that it cost almost 2K in monthly rent to call a micro studio apartment home. New York restricts the size of your soft drinks. So Mississippi puts a law on the book that you cannot restrict the size of a customers soft drink. First world problems USA.
    Last edited by Spicoli; 02-26-2021 at 12:46 AM.

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    Quote Originally Posted by Gandalf View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by NoSavingByTheBell View Post


    @Gandalf is this what you meant ??
    Yes, another company talking absolute bollocks. Stick to selling Coke you daft sods. You could imagine them in Germany 1932: 'Come on Jews, be less darn Jewish'. How is that a good idea?
    Oh snap he is back. Brock wasn’t lying. Wtf how’s life. If Brock was right about you coming back I guess I must have ptsd and all that other shit. Damn, oh well I’ll just start drinking, I hear that works out pretty good

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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf


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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf


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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    @Gandalf

    How I felt when u left


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    Default Re: "Woke Coke" by Gandalf

    But @Gandalf since you left me like that I’ve grown quite close to beaner, this is the final song for you

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