I cut my lip on a cash machine receipt

[Gandalf]

I actually started this thread as just a way of getting something said on here in response to Skel saying it is silent. It was in its own way a great comic gesture. Most of my comedy goes over most heads anyway. I need a paragraph whilst others need just a sentence.

I don't write gags, I write other things.

So you're saying you came up with something random and straight out lied to get something on this board? You're an absolute disgrace, and I will never trust a word typed by your fingers again.

And I hope your lip is afflicted with 100 ghostly papercuts every night while you sleep.

No, it was 1000 true. But as was mentioned, why not speak about a car crash instead? It was satire, but as with any satire, it had realistic foundations.