I kinda need advice. Bad times.

[superheavyrhun]

...edit... Sorry, had to stop posting, wife was at the door without her key and i was on the shitter!!

I suspect this is the bit Missy was referring to.

I once knew a girl from Leeds.......... she ate a packet of seeds,
Within the hour her bum was a flower and her fanny a bed full of weeds.
hope this helps.

Well, at least he'll know not to take her to a garden centre.