how have you aged?

[Primo Carnera]

I didn't really mean physical functions, for instance, my bladders gone, I piss about 30 times a day where as 10/15 years ago id have 1 big piss a day and that's all I needed


I meant how you look


do you think you could still pull in a nightclub?

Mate , that's not just about looks. I mean , no offence, but you're Ginger and that wouldn't have changed in the last 15 years.
no, it's about the patter, the lines. And as for pulling in a nightclub, I'm not being funny , but nowadays it is so much easier.
In my day, you had to work hard for a ride. First the chat up, then buy them a drink, then dance with them, poxy little snog , get their number , grovel like fuck, go on a few dates getting a bit more each time, before sealing the deal!
Now, the birds want it just as much, even more. they don't give a fuck the dirty little minxes!!
With things like tinder and shit, if you are a young guy today, if you wanted to, you could fuck a different bird every night quite easily I reckon.

I tell you what mate, i'm gutted about that


I was about 10 years too old, id be the fella shagging a different bird every night


my mate is single and I keep urging him to get on tinder and get his end away on a regular bases but for some reason he wont


my other mate, middle to late 40s, reckons its very easy and hes shagging young birds all the time


hes a bit of a bullshitter mind so I only kind of half believe him

This is what it sounds like to me, putting my psycho-analytical head on.
1. your single mate is single cos he's a bit of a woos and he's a bit scared he won't get it up or come too quick.
2. your other mate is the polar opposite , full of himself, but also full of bullshit. he only shags all them young birds if he's minted or if he pays for them.
3. then comes you , Slap bang in the middle of them . if you were 10 years younger , you would be dripping in pussy juice!