Don’t assume I never took a belt or have shit happen in my childhood.Trauma is different for everyone though, and I agree with Fats that the child mind is far more delicate than anything else. If you are beaten with a belt regularly then that will have implications, my only contention was that Fats was still smart and able to work. That does not mean that he can ever just erase what he experienced and likewise with me, though I kind of used those experiences to push myself rather make excuses.Both you little pussies have no idea what trauma is. Try a few explosions and see people blown up around you. Worry about mines and snipers. Kick in some doors not knowing what’s on the other side. Take a few rounds when you are tree top flying. I’ll show you trauma. Take off your ballerina shoes and go sell crazy somewhere else I’m full up hereTotally and I get you completely. But when we are talking about money and you have lived in Korea yourself know you could save half of that paycheck and over 2 years, that is 24,000 dollars, plus severance, plus pension refund (if the school paid it), you have the choice in all the jobs you have done over 30 years or so to save that 10%, to invest it. You have worked hard, you have got an education, but you lacked nurturing like I did. However, much trauma you still think you have, you have always had it in you to get out there and get a job and the savings potential has always been there for you. You spent years overseas where you don't even pay rent most of the time. Again, loads of little perks. Trauma has not stopped you working. We knuckle down.you have to realize and it takes time to realize this I think I am still realizing it myself that the people who did it to themselves as you put it or how I think of my own parents when I say damn them that they messed up me and my sister so badly with gaslighting and blame-shifting and verbal abuse and physical belt whippings what you have to realize is that they too what damaged when they grow up they did not consciously do any of that stuff maybe or maybe they were helpless to stop themselves from reacting the way they did in certain situations because perhaps that was exactly the way they were treated and abused for so very very long. So what I'm saying is there is a very large element and its of what is beyond our control and what what we are helpless to because we are human beings we are not super beings we are limited human beings who yes should try as hard as we can but there are just certain things that are beyond our grasp. and that is why I just cannot say that all homeless people or poor people are personally to blame
What you likely saw is horrendous and awful and again something you will never be free from, but unlike the child you chose to put yourself there. The child is not free to decide whether the beating will come or the abandonment will happen or what have you. The child internalizes and typically blames themselves rather than the rotters who did it to them. It gets confused. That's why I am like a broken record with the 'If you cannot raise children properly, then do not do it' mantra.
Still, you saw horrible things that compare to the horrors of Beanz and no doubt it is something that will be with you to the end. That is certainly trauma and the side effects can often be what me and Brock speak about, but likewise, you knuckle down and get on with it all.
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